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Balancing support and self-care

NemuritaiNemuritai Posts: 328 The Mix Regular
in Health & Wellbeing
Hey everyone - I'm just curious to hear other people's advice and experiences on a particular matter. How do you all balance supporting other people (on the mix or otherwise) with looking after your own wellbeing?

I really try my best to provide support in this community whenever I'm able to mentally, but sometimes I'm too depleted emotionally and I guess people aren't much help when they're in that kind of state, so I was interested to know how other people here deal with that.

The topic is other particular interest to me since when I'm older, I'd love to have a job where I can support and help others, specifically children, and I think working in a nursery or a similar setting would be really healing and fulfilling.

I'd love to hear anyone's thoughts <3
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Comments

  • KatieKatie Community Manager Posts: 1,787 Extreme Poster
    Hey @Nemuritai this is a really good question and a super important topic to discuss. We actually have a few boards posts with some guidance on this:

    Our "How you can set boundaries with a friend" post includes how you can use healthy boundaries when communicating with your others, including guidance on how to support friends when they are in crisis and protecting your own wellbeing.

    We also have a "Your guide to supporting each other" post which includes some key things to keep in mind when supporting others, such as active listening, asking questions, and shared experiences. We've also included some examples of each which you can use yourself.

    Lastly, if you're not in the headspace to support others, that's totally okay. Of course we want to see as much support as possible so that the Community can be as connected as possible, but this should not come at the cost of your own well-being! Ask yourself if you have enough mental energy to support at that moment, and if you don't, then it's totally okay to take a step back.

    The Community is here for you to support others, and receive support yourself. We do not expect you to be able to do both all of the time, and you deserve support too.

    To look after your own wellbeing, you could try to come up with a little plan for yourself if you feel a bit funky or drained after helping support, perhaps having a bath or lighting candles, or anything you find calming and soothing. I personally find putting on one of my comfort tv shows can help me decompress and ground myself!

    Remember to be kind to yourself with the demand of supporting others, it can get exhausting and it’s okay not to be able to sometimes.
  • NemuritaiNemuritai Posts: 328 The Mix Regular
    Katie wrote: »
    Hey @Nemuritai this is a really good question and a super important topic to discuss. We actually have a few boards posts with some guidance on this:

    Our "How you can set boundaries with a friend" post includes how you can use healthy boundaries when communicating with your others, including guidance on how to support friends when they are in crisis and protecting your own wellbeing.

    We also have a "Your guide to supporting each other" post which includes some key things to keep in mind when supporting others, such as active listening, asking questions, and shared experiences. We've also included some examples of each which you can use yourself.

    Lastly, if you're not in the headspace to support others, that's totally okay. Of course we want to see as much support as possible so that the Community can be as connected as possible, but this should not come at the cost of your own well-being! Ask yourself if you have enough mental energy to support at that moment, and if you don't, then it's totally okay to take a step back.

    The Community is here for you to support others, and receive support yourself. We do not expect you to be able to do both all of the time, and you deserve support too.

    To look after your own wellbeing, you could try to come up with a little plan for yourself if you feel a bit funky or drained after helping support, perhaps having a bath or lighting candles, or anything you find calming and soothing. I personally find putting on one of my comfort tv shows can help me decompress and ground myself!

    Remember to be kind to yourself with the demand of supporting others, it can get exhausting and it’s okay not to be able to sometimes.

    Thank you very much @Katie for the information and links, that's very helpful. I'll definitely take your advice :heart:
  • sinead276sinead276 Posts: 2,229 Boards Champion
    I think the links and advice Katie has sent are really good.

    For me, I've been on here supporting people (trying to at least) for over 3 years now and for me, it's all about the headspace I'm in. If i can feel it in myself that I'm in a good headspace to offer other people support, comfort or advice, then I'll log on here and reply to posts etc. And if i'm not in the right mindset, or I'm busy or whatever else, I know there is no pressure for me to log on etc.

    As for supporting the people I know in my personal life, I think i balance it by always making time to just relax and take time for myself too. As our own mental health matters just as much as everyone elses :3
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