If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. For Crisis Support (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Check out our JD Support Chats every Monday 8pm-9:30pm in partnership with the JD Foundation. They're focused around all things work, retail, fashion, sport and more.
Click here for more info!
Click here for more info!
Feeling irratable / easily fustrated
Redemption
Community Connector Posts: 5,240 Part of The Furniture
I've noticed I've been irritable during these times, especially in response to certain things that were said. I'm not aggressive; I just get a bit irritable sometimes. During the course I did in June, which focused on gaining skills and working as part of a team, it was ok. I feel like maybe on that course there was a certain person I was a bit more irritable with, but I don’t think that’s bad. Sometimes we might not get on or gel with everyone, and I feel that’s natural and okay.
At the end, we were told to put goals down. I said getting a job for however long I need it. What I meant by “however long” is getting a job, maybe in a store, warehouse, whatever, but then eventually having more of a career. In their minds, they might have thought I meant I’d get a job and quit, but I didn’t mean that and it just frustrated me. They said, “you’ll be working for the rest of your life.” I know what they mean, but I feel like that’s not even broad because most people retire. At some point, I’d like to get out of the rat race, but I don’t have it all planned out yet.
Another thing that irritated me was another goal I put down, buying a house. I feel like “buying a house” is good enough, but they were like, “be more specific,” asking “what area?” and I just thought, “I don’t fucking know.” I didn’t say it out loud. I keep my cool most of the time, but it frustrated me. I know they probably mean well and were trying to help me look at my goals in more detail, but I really don’t know what area I’d want. I think buying a house is a common goal, and I might be wrong, but I don’t think most people have a dream area. It depends on what’s available, what’s safe, affordable, etc. I just don’t know. Again, I don’t have it all planned out, and I feel like “buy a house” is good enough. It’s tough when you feel pressured, going through a tough time, job searching, and stuck in uncertainty. I barely let it out, but I might have thought “I don’t fucking know” and just tried to clarify by explaining I’d like a job until I find a more fulfilling career.
At the end, we were told to put goals down. I said getting a job for however long I need it. What I meant by “however long” is getting a job, maybe in a store, warehouse, whatever, but then eventually having more of a career. In their minds, they might have thought I meant I’d get a job and quit, but I didn’t mean that and it just frustrated me. They said, “you’ll be working for the rest of your life.” I know what they mean, but I feel like that’s not even broad because most people retire. At some point, I’d like to get out of the rat race, but I don’t have it all planned out yet.
Another thing that irritated me was another goal I put down, buying a house. I feel like “buying a house” is good enough, but they were like, “be more specific,” asking “what area?” and I just thought, “I don’t fucking know.” I didn’t say it out loud. I keep my cool most of the time, but it frustrated me. I know they probably mean well and were trying to help me look at my goals in more detail, but I really don’t know what area I’d want. I think buying a house is a common goal, and I might be wrong, but I don’t think most people have a dream area. It depends on what’s available, what’s safe, affordable, etc. I just don’t know. Again, I don’t have it all planned out, and I feel like “buy a house” is good enough. It’s tough when you feel pressured, going through a tough time, job searching, and stuck in uncertainty. I barely let it out, but I might have thought “I don’t fucking know” and just tried to clarify by explaining I’d like a job until I find a more fulfilling career.
0
Comments
You have amazing self awareness Pal. Your absolutely right, irritability I'd not bad. It is a natural emotional response.
It sounds like you handled yourself really well, even though you were frustrated inside. From what you’re describing, I think a lot of the tension comes from a mismatch between how you meant your goals and how they interpreted them.
When you said you wanted “a job for however long I need it,” you meant something reasonable, like a job to cover immediate needs while you work toward something more long-term and fulfilling. That’s actually a very common and practical goal. But because of how you worded it, they may have assumed you meant “I’ll take a job and quit whenever,” which isn’t what you meant at all. Clarifying it the way you just did—“a job for now, until I can transition into a career path that’s more aligned with my interests”—is completely valid.
As for “buying a house,” you’re absolutely right, most people don’t have it all figured out. Wanting to own a home someday is a clear and strong goal. You’re not wrong that you can’t pick an area without knowing your future job, finances, or life situation. Specificity can help, but it doesn’t make sense to force it when you don’t have the info yet.
It also makes sense that all of this would feel overwhelming. Job searching is stressful, uncertainty is stressful, and then being put on the spot to explain goals in a way that feels like you’re being judged, that is going to get to you. The fact that you stayed calm and tried to clarify shows a lot of self-control.
I do know you have a job interview so you're doing amazing Pal.
Sorry if this doesn't help at all, I'm trying my absolute best.
@Animalloverb thank you so much, this does help, you're always so helpful, I promise please don't think otherwise. This is a great response, you don't need to worry about not being much or any help, you're definitely helpful.