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Community Check-In šŸ’›

ellaella Community Manager Posts: 359 Listening Ear
edited January 18 in Community Announcements
Hi everyone,

We understand that the previous thread about some new safeguarding policies generated a lot of strong emotions, including confusion, worry, and frustration. We want to honour these feelings let you you know they are valid- we know change can feel so overwhelming. We wanted to open up this thread so we can have some constructive conversations together about some of the worries that were raised this morning :)

A few important reminders:

Community Guidelines: It's not okay to post private Direct Messages (DMs) in public spaces.

Public Forum: Please remember that our community boards are public spaces. Sharing details about private, live, and ongoing safeguarding cases in a public setting is not safe so please be mindful about what you choose to share.

ā€”

We know that there's been a lot of change at The Mix, including team changes and the merger with MHI. These changes havenā€™t been easy and have led some of you to feel uncertain or anxious about the service. We want to assure you that we're navigating these changes alongside youā€” this period of transition has been tricky for our team as well. With so many staff changes, we're all adjusting to new roles and responsibilities and only want to do whatsā€™s best for you all. It's all of us versus these challenges, not us versus each other <3

We hear your confusion around the current safeguarding policies and take accountability for the absence of communication around this. In light of this, we're organising a Safeguarding Q&A where you'll have the opportunity to "meet" The Mix and MHI safeguarding officers on the boards and ask them your questions directly.

To help our officers prepare, you can also pre-submit anonymous questions via this form: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSciKHfwEGmqXevpHmhHvsZaVTDgtqYf7K8HoOn9YPEgeXM91A/viewform

Weā€™ll also be setting up a Safeguarding Glossary thread which will hopefully provide clear definitions of key terms and processes, such as "Position of Trust" and the procedures for contacting non-emergency and emergency services to avoid any confusion moving forward.

ā€”

We want to emphasise that we encourage you to ask any questions you may have. While the previous thread was closed in line with our community guidelines, this was not intended to shut down the conversation or disempower anyone. We understand that there's a lot of panic and confusion, and we know that it can be especially difficult to navigate these issues when you're also dealing with other things outside of this forum. We truly want to listen to your opinions and welcome all your questions in this space.

We know there have been a lot of recent changes for all of us to process ā€“ staff changes, merging with MHI, and shifts in Safeguarding. It's a lot to take in, and it can feel unsettling.

We hear you, and you deserve clarity.

ā€”

We hope this thread has been helpful in opening up a space for open and honest conversation. We value your presence on the community and will work together to create a safe, supportive and trusting space for everyone.

If you have questions about your own personal, ongoing safeguarding case, please DM us. We're working with the safeguarding team to get answers for you and will reply as quickly as possible.

:star:

Comments

  • Rose113Rose113 Community Champion Posts: 2,818 Boards Guru
    Thank you @ella <3
    Want to hurt meā€¦ go ahead
    Wish to bully meā€¦Iā€™m used to it
    Want to talk crap about meā€¦go on then
    Want to make me cryā€¦feel free
  • Sian321Sian321 Community Manager Posts: 271 The Mix Regular
    Thank you very much for this post, @ella . I echo everything you have shared. Ella and I are here all day today to support you all <3
  • shannon_164shannon_164 Posts: 540 Incredible Poster
    thank you for this @ella - as much as the many changes have been super hard and sometimes a bit confusing, itā€™s understandable that it hasnā€™t been ā€˜perfectā€™ toošŸ™‚

    iā€™m so grateful for the support that use provide us all with - all the staff and mods are amazingšŸ©·
  • Summerjune15Summerjune15 Posts: 99 Budding Regular
    @ella thank you and @Sian321 thank you too and I am sorry Iā€™m just freaking out about the situation but personally I donā€™t think the police will need to get in contact with me it was 4 years ago and thereā€™s no evidence I donā€™t remember the police officers appearance name etc so Iā€™m not going to stress because an investigation is not happening over something that happened along time ago with no evidence or donā€™t know the male officer etc
  • Lili5BetLili5Bet Posts: 48 Boards Initiate
    Thank you @ella <3
  • FaolanFaolan Posts: 124 The Mix Convert
    This will be helpful. Thank you for organising it
  • independent_independent_ Community Champion Posts: 9,080 Supreme Poster
    edited January 18
    I got back to the original thread in time before it gets deleted, but with the edits I am still somewhat confused. I understand why the mix might need to call police in some circumstances but I feel communication on this needs to be really, really clear. AKA, we have called 101 because of x reason, and this is what might happen next.

    People are rightfully scared of police and the impact a police call will have. If the mix keep any form of notes on individual people, they might know the reasons why - Iā€™m sure you know my own reasons for distrusting police. Itā€™s a shame that police, rather than healthcare professionals, are who all of these services (not just the mix but shout and others too) have to turn to - most arenā€™t trained in any of this mental health stuff (appreciate itā€™s different for safeguarding).

    Edited to say that it does raise questions around the mixā€™s role in historical abuse cases. Iā€™m not talking about ongoing abuse here, but someone who is now an adult disclosing that they were abused in childhood. This is not an emergency if theyā€™re out of the situation and many will feel uncomfortable reporting it for whatever reason, and putting pressure on these people to report can push them away from accessing support.
    ā€œSometimes the people around you wonā€™t understand your journey. They donā€™t need to, itā€™s not for them.ā€
  • Summerjune15Summerjune15 Posts: 99 Budding Regular
    @independent_ hi so basically 4 years ago a police officer said I deserve a beating cause of my behaviour but it was just my mental health at the time and I do have behavioural issues but anyway someone was talking about police in the support group chat and I shared my experience to let that person know I understand but because it was someone of trust like police they had to report it but I donā€™t know whatā€™s going to happen next and thatā€™s why Iā€™m so annoyed and panicking but Iā€™m not going to worry about it If the police get in contact with me or turn up to my house Iā€™ve been on edge for 3 days and my friend is coming over so Iā€™m just going to have a good time
  • independent_independent_ Community Champion Posts: 9,080 Supreme Poster
    @independent_ hi so basically 4 years ago a police officer said I deserve a beating cause of my behaviour but it was just my mental health at the time and I do have behavioural issues but anyway someone was talking about police in the support group chat and I shared my experience to let that person know I understand but because it was someone of trust like police they had to report it but I donā€™t know whatā€™s going to happen next and thatā€™s why Iā€™m so annoyed and panicking but Iā€™m not going to worry about it If the police get in contact with me or turn up to my house Iā€™ve been on edge for 3 days and my friend is coming over so Iā€™m just going to have a good time

    @Summerjune15 that might have been myself you were talking to about it. I do remember now so thanks for reminding me.
    ā€œSometimes the people around you wonā€™t understand your journey. They donā€™t need to, itā€™s not for them.ā€
  • Summerjune15Summerjune15 Posts: 99 Budding Regular
    @eylah absolutely hate the police thatā€™s why I freaked when they said they calling 101 but thank you for earlieršŸ’•
  • eylaheylah Posts: 5,826 Part of The Furniture
    @eylah absolutely hate the police thatā€™s why I freaked when they said they calling 101 but thank you for earlieršŸ’•

    sending you hugs you can always msg me if you need anything <3
    keep your face always toward the sunshine and shadows will fall behind you. šŸ¤

    pfp made by @Chloe234 ā¤ļø
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,719 Skive's The Limit
    edited January 19
    I just think some things you donā€™t take control out of someone. If someone has open up about something I believe it is our job to give them a place they feel safe to share and they are in control and you donā€™t take that power away from them. If they want something reporting you ask them , say maybe this is wrong. Would you feel comfortable reporting it- not completely go behind them and reporting something. I donā€™t want to read the rules tbh cause I fear this is just respect. If someone comes up to me and tells me something concerning but none emergency - as much as Iā€™d want to report it - that would just break trust. Iā€™d highlight why is concerning and ask if theyā€™d report it and let them be in control of that. Iā€™d not just listen say nothing and then go behind there back and report it. Theyā€™d never speak to me again and i thought that is where online annoymous communities were good in terms of it being confidential and safe place. These what seem like new rules goes completely against what the mix was made for and thatā€™s really disappointing cause a lot of people are not going to speak up about a lot of things now incase you break confidentiality and wonā€™t trust this place. When thatā€™s how you can get opinions on if a situation is concerning or not without the control being taken away from you but get given opinions upon the situation and have the control yourself. I think youā€™re completely misunderstanding our capacity to make decisions for ourselves and not understanding how distressing it is when a place youā€™ve trusted just completely make it not anonymous

    The site is annoymous and it should stay that way unless In life threatening 999 situation

    ā€œAnd when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.ā€ ~ Kirsten Corley
  • shannon_164shannon_164 Posts: 540 Incredible Poster
    @Siena services such as the mix are legally obligated to report safeguarding concerns in the same way it would have to be reported if it was disclosed to a social worker for example.

    i know you said youā€™re donā€™t want to read the rules, however the confidentiality policy will clearly outline for you situations in which the mix will be required to tell someone what you have shared.
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,719 Skive's The Limit
    Then they can not call it an annoymous service anymore. I donā€™t think itā€™s a legal thing. A lot of places wonā€™t ring the police for these things, unless the law has changed.
    ā€œAnd when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.ā€ ~ Kirsten Corley
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,719 Skive's The Limit
    edited January 19
    The amount of things Iā€™ve said here over the years of how people have treated me in current or in the past.and Iā€™ve seen many been shared of how they treated someone and now regret. Is a rediculous amount and if theyā€™re ringing police over one comment that was made 4 years ago. They will be making a lot of 101 phone calls that I literally think the police would start to question on if this is morally right for them to keep doing without consent and using a lot of time for investigations that the initial person doesnā€™t want to be made and therefore will not go much further if said user doesnā€™t want to give evidence or engage or give consent - it can be a massive waste of police time
    ā€œAnd when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.ā€ ~ Kirsten Corley
  • FaolanFaolan Posts: 124 The Mix Convert
    edited January 19
    I couldnā€™t agree with ye anymore @siena . Itā€™s disempowering and actually quite insulting that decisions are made without our consent. Some of the staff are younger than the service users so why would they think they donā€™t have the capacity to report none emergencies themselves, if they wanted to. And if they canā€™t reach out to services like these without trusting that it will go no further, where can they talk? Is this not a step back in digital mental health services rather than a step forward ?

    It was never the law before the merger. You could speak freely with the confidence that nothing would be shared unless in immediate danger. Now, issues are suppressed rather than talked about.

    Itā€™s not about the law. Itā€™s about taking on SHOUTs confidentiality policy . A service which has absolutely terrible reviews. Itā€™s sad.

  • shannon_164shannon_164 Posts: 540 Incredible Poster
    @Faolan shout has a different confidentiality policy to the mix - non emergencies do not get reported by shout, and i know that from my own experience of being a current volunteer with them.

    youā€™re completely entitled to your own opinion ofc but like all services, shout has both positive and negative reviews - the mix, childline, samaritans, lifeline and all the rest ALL have both positive and negative reviews.
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,719 Skive's The Limit
    edited January 19
    I was about to say that it canā€™t be cause of shout. They have very relaxed rules compared to the mix. Even before these rules. So if anything I thought the rules would get a lot more relaxed with the merge not the complete end

    So it canā€™t be a law thing if shout donā€™t
    ā€œAnd when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.ā€ ~ Kirsten Corley
  • FaolanFaolan Posts: 124 The Mix Convert
    edited January 19
    @Faolan shout has a different confidentiality policy to the mix - non emergencies do not get reported by shout, and i know that from my own experience of being a current volunteer with them.

    youā€™re completely entitled to your own opinion ofc but like all services, shout has both positive and negative reviews - the mix, childline, samaritans, lifeline and all the rest ALL have both positive and negative reviews.


    I appreciate you saying that my friend but V himself said that they are taking on the same confidentiality policy as shout. I specifically asked him. As they are now the same charity. So unless thatā€™s changed šŸ¤·šŸ¼ā€ā™‚ļø

    That was not my opinion and I appreciate that all charities have positive and negative reviews. Iā€™ve never used shout and never will. Reviews are easily accessed online and a lot are 1 star due to confidentiality being broken in situations they deemed unnecessary.
  • shannon_164shannon_164 Posts: 540 Incredible Poster
    edited January 19
    @Faolan i was only saying that i know from my experience as a shout volunteer that it is very much not the same as the mixā€™s policy re non emergencies - sometimes shout will complete a safeguarding report for internal use only however non emergencies do not get reported as far as iā€™m aware from experience etc.

    directly from the shout website it says: ā€œWe take your confidentiality very seriously and your Shout conversations are confidential, unless we are concerned about your safety. If we think you or someone else is in immediate physical danger or that you or someone elseā€™s life is at imminent risk, we will try to work with you to form a safety plan. If this is not possible or if we think you are at risk of what are called ā€˜safeguarding issuesā€™ (for example abuse or neglect), a Clinician (a qualified mental health professional) may share your details with the emergency services or appropriate authorities, including police, ambulance/medical and social services, in order to keep you (or anyone else) safe and as necessary to protect your vital interestsā€

    i know in situations where i have had confidentiality broken, in that moment ive been scared, anxious and upset, i 9 out of 10 times have said there was absolutely no need for it to happen it was just silly but whenever time has went in and im in a better headspace i can see most the time why it happened and that there was actually a reason for it - im not saying thats how it is everytime, but realistically, there are people who have wrote reviews for shout, and other places that have maybe not been in the right headspace and as a result do not see it as a necessary response.

    edit: added in directly from shout websitešŸ™‚
    Post edited by shannon_164 on
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,719 Skive's The Limit
    Most of their 101 reports would get closed straight away because if the user doesnā€™t want to engage then itā€™s hard to get evidence and pointless. Especially if they are reporting something years ago and without consent then the cases will not get much investigation. And if they make a lot of reports which I am assuming they will as what has happened so far with such small things then I think even the police will question their policy and whatā€™s morally right for an ā€œannoymous serviceā€ and doing reports without consent. A lot of unnecessary police time.

    And I think when the mix realises they are doing more harm than good with this rule theyll soon switch it up
    ā€œAnd when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.ā€ ~ Kirsten Corley
  • FaolanFaolan Posts: 124 The Mix Convert
    Thatā€™s interesting to know, cheers @shannon_164 šŸ‘šŸ» It mustā€™ve changed since V told me that because he definitely said theyā€™re changing their confidentiality policy so that it matches SHOUTS. I read through everything and asked tonnes of questions.

    Iā€™ll be interested to hear more about how itā€™s all going to work going forwards with the safeguarding people.
  • Chloe234Chloe234 Community Champion Posts: 3,813 Community Veteran
    edited January 19
    I'm gonna put the FAQ that V answered here that I took directly from the confidentiality post as I feel it answers a fair bit of what is being said here:
    Why do you have to report non-emergencies?
    Mostly legal reasons - there's some new legislation coming into effect now which puts more responsibility on institutions (like us) to report more safeguarding concerns.

    The field of safeguarding has also moved on quite a bit from where our confidentiality policy was previously, so there's some wider change in our sector too.

    Does this mean The Mix will report things more lightly?
    Not necessarily. It's a funny one - there will probably be more situations where we escalate something as a non-emergency, but less situations where we escalate as an emergency.

    So the total number of reports we make will likely go up, but the number of emergencies should go down.

    Is your policy the same as Shout's now?
    Yes, Shout and The Mix now operate under one policy.

    Does this only apply to things posted after the merger?
    Yes, that's correct.

    There are a couple of reasons for that. 1) there's simply no way we could go through old posts, and 2) the information and safeguarding risk presented in old posts would be out of date.

    When we're conducting risk assessments, we need the information we're using to be new and current for it to be a useful process for the person involved.

    What happens in a non emergency? Will it just take police longer to come out?
    So, there are a huge number of possibilities and it depends on the services involved. The honest answer is we don't know - and they may not tell us what they decide to do.

    Our role in that situation is to pass the information on to the services involved, and they don't always keep us informed on what decisions they make with that information.

    It might be that the police just keep that information on file in case more reports come in in the future, it may be that someone reaches out to you (like your social worker), it may be that someone comes out to you in person. I realise that's quite vague, though!

    The key thing is that we'll always be transparent about our actions with you, and we'll communicate any information we have at the time.

    Are there any non-emergency situations that apply to adults?
    If someone is an adult (not an adult at risk of harm) there are no instances where we would escalate something as a non-emergency. The only time we weigh in with that age group is when there is an immediate threat to life involved - a bit like our old policy.
    šŸ¦†šŸ’œšŸ¦†šŸ’œšŸ¦†
  • independent_independent_ Community Champion Posts: 9,080 Supreme Poster
    edited January 20
    As a former shout volunteer, I think there were some situations where it would be reported as a non emergency. The safeguarding report isnā€™t just for internal use, itā€™s passed on to relevant organisations. Sure it goes to their internal safeguarding team first, but it is passed on outside of the organisation. Most of these situations would involve minors or adults at risk.

    That said though, former is the key word here - I havenā€™t been a volunteer since the merger and shout are asking all current volunteers to do further training, so I do appreciate that this may have changed.

    Edited to add that the policies do now look mostly the same. I donā€™t have access to the system anymore, but from my (admittedly very poor) memory and asking the mix, things appear to be the same between the 2 services.
    ā€œSometimes the people around you wonā€™t understand your journey. They donā€™t need to, itā€™s not for them.ā€
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