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My mum keeps staying round

SienaSiena Posts: 15,495 Skive's The Limit
in Home, Law & Money
Since christmas shes been here. I cant stand her. She sleeps on the sofa, stinks like shit and making the whole house feel trampy. She never washes.
(She doesnt live with us cause she negoected us in the other house so we left- shes some sort of hoarder & the house she lived in isnt safe so we left while she still lives there)
i just really hope its only because it was christmas and new year cause i cant stand her and i swear i feel like killing myself even more when shes here. She shouts. No stops speaks. And watches tv and go look "look shaunie look at how fat she is no wonder the nhs is in crisis" "look shaunie hes ginger" "oh its cause hes gay" "gingers are always horrible" " of corse hes ginger" "how is she still alive shes so fat". She moans about all these people yet shes fat herself snd lives i a massive shit whole. Like shes any better or healthier. Shes so deluded and i cant stand listening to her another day. I cant stay in bed all day cause for one it really hurts my body and 2 they call me anti social and shout it i do. 
She can speak about literally anything. No stop and all i is yeah "hm" "yeah" i can listen to no stop speaking all the time

but she is the only person who has asked me where i go every thursday (counselling. No one has ever asked me who  my appointment is with, til today). But then she starts talking about other peopke have it worse lol cant stand it
“And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley

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    JustVJustV Community Manager Posts: 5,306 Part of The Furniture
    God, this sounds exhausting. I can totally understand why this is getting to you, especially considering the history you have with your mum and the neglect. Not a nice situation to be in. :confused:

    Sorry if this is an obvious thing you've already done, but have you asked her how long she plans to be there? Also, who are you living with atm? Did your mum turn up and stay of her own volition or was she invited by someone?

    but she is the only person who has asked me where i go every thursday (counselling. No one has ever asked me who  my appointment is with, til today). But then she starts talking about other peopke have it worse lol cant stand it

    This stood out to me. Although it doesn't sound like that conversation ended very well, is her asking something you appreciated?

    Sorry, lots of questions! Hope that's okay :)
    All behaviour is a need trying to be met.
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    SienaSiena Posts: 15,495 Skive's The Limit
    Mike said:
    God, this sounds exhausting. I can totally understand why this is getting to you, especially considering the history you have with your mum and the neglect. Not a nice situation to be in. :confused:

    Sorry if this is an obvious thing you've already done, but have you asked her how long she plans to be there? Also, who are you living with atm? Did your mum turn up and stay of her own volition or was she invited by someone?

    but she is the only person who has asked me where i go every thursday (counselling. No one has ever asked me who  my appointment is with, til today). But then she starts talking about other peopke have it worse lol cant stand it

    This stood out to me. Although it doesn't sound like that conversation ended very well, is her asking something you appreciated?

    Sorry, lots of questions! Hope that's okay :)
    Thank you @Mike She has finally left. Which is good cause i started getting into an argument with one of her comments that was on the tv. They said to keep trying after you fail. My mum was like "i dont believe in that quote - if you fail. You need to leave it". So went into massive rant about how people successed failed many times ect ect and she was like "no you shouldnt try again it will knock your confidence more - if you fail you cant do it". So that explains why she stays at home and has no life. Cant stand her negativey. Her most common one is about overweight people while shes sitting in front of the tv only ever eating junk food. Deluded. 

    But glad shes gone. I don’t know when she will be back. She comes some days and thats normal. Comes for a few hours then goes. But im just hoping that she hasnt got into a habit of sleeping here now cause omg will cry. Its hard to listen to my own head as well as someone speaking none stop- plus when its all negative too. Its like trying to listen to two negative convos i just cant

    I never invite her. My dad does cause theyre still married just dont live with each other cause of how she lives. My dad is obsessed with her and only cares about her - more than his own kids. Even tho shes a trap. I just live with one of my sister, my dad and teddy. Tho thats even stressful cause my sister calls me lazy sooooo many times in just one day. 

    I did appecate her asking. Just shit how she said that after. I think she thought it was helpful. I think im her favourate child cause i get the less irrated by her. Cause im just beyond it - it only causes more arguments. My sisters get aggitated just as me but they still dont realise theres no point reacting cause shes so deluded and set in her ways. Clearly mentally something wrong. Think its normal to not wash. 

    And omggg. Because was christmas and alll. My older sister's husband was round when my mum was and lol even he doesnt like her cause of the things she comes out with and hes hardly spent any time with her. But omg he told my sister after wards that she smelt like a homeless person. Which is proper awkward because he doesnt know how we all lived (very neglected) and doesnt know why shes is like that

    . Which to me in itself is odd. - hiding from your husband about your past when it something that comes out- like never knew where we used to live even  was living there when they got together. And he doesnt understand things like why she lives alone. Its like - youre married why cant you speak about that to him. It wasnt your fault to live like that and you cant help who your mum is. Is that normal? Its like some massive secret that cant tell anyone but who lived there. I mean like i told people. Like they would hate me even if they found out i told my counsellor
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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    SienaSiena Posts: 15,495 Skive's The Limit
    Fucking hell. She is making a habit of it. Shes staying round the whole weekend. Been here since friday. Omg i fee like dying. I cant take her. The weekends, well every other two weekend, is the only time i have home alone and it feels really peaceful. Shes fucking ruining it for me and i just want to literally die now
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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