How can I help my brother???

Former Member · January 2019

Hi,
So I think my little brother (LB) might be a ****, and I was hoping someone here would be able to give me some advice on how best to support him.
He keeps stealing my mum's and my clothes and wearing them in his room. We've both made it clear that we don't care if he wants to wear feminine clothes, just can he stop nicking ours please. We've tried to suggest shopping trips to get him some stuff of his own, but he gets really defensive about it and clams up.
I found more of my dresses in his room, so I'm going to suggest looking at online sites tonight (I think his problem with the shopping trip is what if people he knows see him?)
But how can I help him without him feeling pressured to come out and to let him know that it's okay to be himself and that we'll always support him?

Former Member · January 2019

Heyyy @Past User,

First of all it's really nice to hear he's got your support bud. It sounds to me like he's feeling pretty self-conscious about it. We unfortunately live in a society where we have all these gender-stereotypes and expectations, which def shouldn't be the case, so I understand he may be scared of judgment and possibly ashamed.

Maybe try to have an open discussion with him about it. Let him know that feminine/masculine clothing is just a construct, and that he's awesome. Try to encourage him to talk so that he can voice any confusion or concern he might be feeling, just ask "how are you feeling about this?". Just try to be casual and calm and supportive, I think that's one of the best things you can do.

I think suggesting looking at online sites is a good idea

Also just dropping in an idea, if he is feeling scared to be himself, perhaps it could be more comfortable for him to slowly start dropping feminine things into his outfits? For example, first he could wear a feminine necklace, then a more feminine top, and so on, until he feels confident enough to wear dresses or whatever he likes.

Sorry if this was no help lol, wishing you all the best either way.

Siena · January 2019

Aw you sound like a really good sister.

have you thought about maybe buying him a dress similar to yours - for him. So he gets a dress/peice of clothe that he hasnt nicked from you and its also telling him that you accept it and support him & may encorage him to be more open to you and would show that its okay and you want to support

How can I help my brother???

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