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Failing to quit AGAIN!

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hi all, I've been reading some of your posts, and you all seem to be pretty sound! So I've worked up the courage to ask for advice!

I have been trying to limit my drink/drug use as I know I've lost control, I'm not sure when I became addicted, but I'm using more and more drugs to get by, making excuses not to see friends and family so I can use instead.

The thing is when I try to quit or even reduce what I take, I may be strong for half hour to an hour then I can't stop thinking about getting high, I try to distract myself, but even if I could be strong for 23 hours and 50 minutes a day it is no use as that 10 minuets I let myself down & use again, or phone my dealer, I'm the kind of person that will use it till it's gone, swear I'm not gonna buy more, then get panicky as my 'safety net' is gone, so I buy more. I know I'm out of control and it's effecting the rest of my life, I know I make excuses not to quit, I'm weak and I despise that about me, when did I become such a desperate pathetic person who can't control herself for even a day.
Any advice?

Damn if only willpower was as easy to by as drugs!

Oh by the way, I really like the little inspirational message you lot have added! Great site, great support, and sorry I've been replying to do many posts, I've been trying to stay busy so ax not to take anymore speed tonight - helping others is helping me, so sorry if I've gone on a bit x

Comments

  • Danny!Danny! mod Posts: 560 The answer to life, the universe, and everything
    It's really good you're asking for help. Quitting is a big thing, and it's really good that you recognise there's something wrong, and that you're trying and want to get help.

    I think it's really important that you find support. It's a big thing to do cutting down on drugs, and while the drive has to come from you, people tend to really benefit from some support, especially from people who have been through addiction and some level of recovery. So, keep talking. But I think some specific support would be good too.

    Just to add to JavaKrypt's suggestions (all good ones): Talk to Frank provides online information and run a freephone information service on 0800 77 66 00 (open 24 hours every day). They also have text, live chat (from2pm-6pm) and email services. They could help you with finding services in your local area.

    It might be worth considering Narcotics Anonymous (NA) as well.


  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks, I'll have a look at those!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    What drugs are you doing and are you experiencing withdrawals?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    First of all let me say, you are anything but weak. It takes a great deal of strength to realize you have a problem and even more to ask for help with it. In my lifetime I have quit cocaine, cigarettes and drinking. And the best advice I ever got was after I'd quit smoking for the 5th or 6th time. I'd made it 5 weeks and thought "this time I have it beat!!". But, like you, it was all I could think about. One of the biggest things that was bothering me about it was the idea of telling my dad I didn't think I could make it and was going to start back up. He didn't get angry or judgemental at all. He simply said "well, I guess all I can say is if you don't make it this time, try again. just never quit quitting". Not only did that make me realize I was human, it made me realize I could do it. About a year later I did quit. That was 11 years ago. You CAN do it. And it's ok to struggle with it. After all, the struggle means you're still fighting. Way to go.
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