Grief is too much to bare.
This is kind of hard to talk about but I feel like I can't keep it inside anymore. Tonight just seemed to explode a lot of raw feelings for me and I'm not sure where to go so I figured I would come here.
I really miss my grandad. He died from Dementia 2 and a half years ago. I feel terrible. I regret every choice I made when I came home from college that day. They told me he won't make it through the night but I didn't believe them. This was said years before when he was in a coma but he made it through. I knew he was strong. Not even an hour later he was dead. I didn't see him before he died. Everyone else left but I didn't. I feel awful. I was never allowed to talk about my thoughts and feelings when we lost him. Everyone just carried on as if nothing happened. I just can't hold it in any more.
Tonight I miss him more than anything. I just want to see him again.
I don't know why I'm posting really. Advice on how to cope? Where to get support? Just to vent? I don't know.. Sorry guys.
I am made entirely of flaws, stitched together with good intentions.