If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Options
How long before it's classed as a relationship?
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hey :wave:
Just looking for a bit of advice really.
I've been seeing a lad since the beginning of December and we are currently on date number 7.
These dates/days out have consisted of a variety of different things from watching DVD's, to dinner with my family.
When he comes round he more than happy to lay on sofa with me, lounge around the house, holding hands, kissing etc even in front of family members.
We've had many conversations about things that I would consider "couply" such as him hoping I'm not one for keeping him under the thumb, to which I replied that I wasn't as long as he wasn't the controlling type. (A past relationship proper messed my head up with such behaviour) as well as things like sleeping arrangements for staying over each others houses and him telling me he's never met a girl like me before.
I'm just a little bit confused as to when a guy classes it as your going out? I mean we text each other every day, he rings me on his breaks, we see each other couple of times a week inbetween us both working and as far as I know he enjoys each time as much as me
I don't wanna push him and fly in there with the "So are we going out or what" question in case it all goes wrong and he see's it as me going too fast with him?
He has told his close circle of friends about me, as well as his parents, and i've done the same my end so its not like anything is behind closed doors.
My parents see our behaviour as one of a couple going out, however I would like something a bit more official like a simple question or text just so I know where I stand. Lol. Old fashioned or what?!
But any advice on what goes on in a guy's head in this kind of situation would be much appreciated.
Just looking for a bit of advice really.
I've been seeing a lad since the beginning of December and we are currently on date number 7.
These dates/days out have consisted of a variety of different things from watching DVD's, to dinner with my family.
When he comes round he more than happy to lay on sofa with me, lounge around the house, holding hands, kissing etc even in front of family members.
We've had many conversations about things that I would consider "couply" such as him hoping I'm not one for keeping him under the thumb, to which I replied that I wasn't as long as he wasn't the controlling type. (A past relationship proper messed my head up with such behaviour) as well as things like sleeping arrangements for staying over each others houses and him telling me he's never met a girl like me before.
I'm just a little bit confused as to when a guy classes it as your going out? I mean we text each other every day, he rings me on his breaks, we see each other couple of times a week inbetween us both working and as far as I know he enjoys each time as much as me
I don't wanna push him and fly in there with the "So are we going out or what" question in case it all goes wrong and he see's it as me going too fast with him?
He has told his close circle of friends about me, as well as his parents, and i've done the same my end so its not like anything is behind closed doors.
My parents see our behaviour as one of a couple going out, however I would like something a bit more official like a simple question or text just so I know where I stand. Lol. Old fashioned or what?!
But any advice on what goes on in a guy's head in this kind of situation would be much appreciated.
0
Comments
Ive had the same problem before but thankfully I was always asked (once in a rather formal yet drunk marriage proposal type 'will you be my girlfriend' and the secnd, just a text saying, i guess we're going out now)
Maybe he doesnt feel like he has to officially confirm it because as you say, everyone knows it and you dont try to hide it.
Maybe what you could do is subtely work the word 'boyfriend' or 'girlfriend' into your conversation to refer to one of you and see how he reacts, or just simply ask him
He replied that he liked me. A lot. However, wasn't prepared to change as a person to anything that he wasn't. Eg- staying in all weekend, only spending time with me, and not living life as he does now.
I explained that I didn't want that, because he wouldn't be the person I'd grown to like if he changed anything and after my last relationship I was all for going out with friends seperately and non-suffocating behaviour, as long as we spent time with each other as well, same as we have been doing for the last couple of weeks. He very happy with that so confirmed that yeah he is officially all mine now! :hyper: :yippe:
So thankyou guys, I guess it just took a lil bit of courage to work out what goes on in a lad's head!
I know how hard and nerve wracking it is to ask questions like that, but it sounds like you two and going good and strong and have the right balance of spending time together and seperately Well done and good luck with it
I'm just like :yippe: :yippe: at the moment like some kind of schoolgirl!
But it's a nice feeling, fingers crossed for it staying this way