If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Options
chatting up a lady
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
hey guys, new to the site. reasonably long thread so bear with me read around and there seems to be a fair bit of really good advice. im likin the vibe.. its another repetitive type question, so im sorry, but basically im nearly 20, at uni and i find it really difficult talking to girls in bars/clubs. at uni i find it ridiculously easy to talk to girls and make friends with them etc, however when it comes to a girl i like/find attractive my mind goes blank for some reason. :chin:
when im out i seem to get signals from girls but i fail to act on them because i dont really know what to do/say. ill give you an example that happened last week. was in a bar with a mate playing pool. this girl comes over, hovers for a minute or so and then she asks if she can play next - whilst at the same time being really forward with her body languag. i obliged. about a minute later im about to take a shot and she grabs my arse and my mind goes blank...wtf?:eek2: i didnt know wt to do..so i just kinda..ignored it and then later felt like a complete dick :banghead:
any ideas?
:thumb:
when im out i seem to get signals from girls but i fail to act on them because i dont really know what to do/say. ill give you an example that happened last week. was in a bar with a mate playing pool. this girl comes over, hovers for a minute or so and then she asks if she can play next - whilst at the same time being really forward with her body languag. i obliged. about a minute later im about to take a shot and she grabs my arse and my mind goes blank...wtf?:eek2: i didnt know wt to do..so i just kinda..ignored it and then later felt like a complete dick :banghead:
any ideas?
:thumb:
0
Comments
In that situation, when she grabbed your arse, why not say summat like
"Cheeky!! Tell you what lets make the game more interesting, you win you can do it again, I win I'll get you back"
It's hardly pick up line of the year, nor Shakespeare but just a roll off the tongue comment and as shes obviously interested the conversation will flow from there.
Just do a similar thing, but obviously offer to buy them a drink instead - it all depends on the situation - you can really have a 'one size fits all situations' malarkey!
Just remember that 9 out of 10 times if you don't ask you don't get. Just put the work in, what do you have to lose by putting yourself out there? (other than pride, but that grows back so don't worry about it! )
i know what your saying. but you cant go straight up to a girl in a bar/club, tell them your name, ask them theirs and then say can i buy you a drink? theres no panache to it. how can i be witty without being given something to work with, unless your saying that that would happen once we start talking?? :chin:
From this you can either stick around and chat for a bit or make your excuses and leave with the promise to call her.
On the flip side of this if you get rejected, most girls are really nice about it and the nasty ones are not worth your time anyway.
It's all about confidence - getting rejected in a club is nothing, and it's also better than wondering what if.
yeah do girls understand how difficult approaching a girl actually is? if so it would soften the blow a bit. cheers for your input so far guys
www.topdatingtips.com
There is more than enough panache in just going straight up to a girl. Also, if you get rejected by a girl just go under the theory that "It's her loss",don't even consider that it may have been your problem, it's hers. She is missing out on the opportunity to get to know a perfectly nice guy.