If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Options
Threesome?
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I started sort of seeing a guy about three months ago, he made all the moves and I liked him so decided to just see what happens. He started asking questions about what I wnat to do with my life, past relationships - seemed like he was trying to suss out what sort of girl I am.Basically I've had 1 serious relationship and aren't that fussed about either casual sex or serious relationship. If I meet someone I like I'll go for it but not get too involved til I know it's going somewhere (or not). He's got kids and seems quite family orientated. But, a couple of weeks ago he came to see me with his mate, another man (I knew him a bit already) and the guy (I thought I sort of was seeing wanted a threesome). I was a bit surprised. Anyone got any ideas why a guy would go to such great lengths to suss out what type of person i am (literally every other conversation we've had alone since meeting), then do this?
0
Comments
No. I got questions about how many boyfriends I'd had. Oddly enough he seemed to like the not many response I gave. I'm not a very flirtatious person, so that's made the whole thing more confusing. Not ruling out the possibilty he is just out to be manipulative. I guess I don't know him well enough and it's not like I've asked him to explain his actions yet, so suppose that is the next step. He may just be a bit apprhensive about getting involved with someone and I don't give much away about what I'm thinking...but yeh, not really up for seeing two guys at the same time and definitely NOT AT THE SAME TIME, haha.
Errr... Not every guy is like this. I couldn't give a monkey's how many people my girl has slept with. It's not important at all, neither is it important how many people I have slept with.
Admittedly, my girl was a bit shocked when she asked how many people I had been with. But she wanted to know, so I told her.
I can't say it bothers me how many people a potential partner has been with. Although I'm sure I've not said anything that is likely to be interpreted as I would be up for a threesome, I guess the topic wasn't exactly mentioned and I don;t give much away about my feelings, so it's possible he thinks I'm not that interested in him, so it could be he's giving me the opportunity to go off with his mate to decide whether or not I am interested? I guess I just need to be more direct with him, find out some more about him and take it from there. I've decided I'm not bothered whether or not he was just after one thing. I liked spending time with him until things got weird, so if I can see where he's coming from and I can keep things not too heavy until I've spent more time with him I can decide whether to walk away or see how things go. I'd just like to know so I can keep some control over the situation as it's obviously got a bit conflicting since that night. His mate was asking me what was going on between us, so I may use that as a starting point...do people think that's a good idea? I've never been great at initiating these sorts of conversations, so advice is welcome!