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When I was younger I would keep photos of exes but that was only because I wasn't over them. I have stumbled across them years after and thought "why do I want that?" and just thrown them away. I've never regretted it, don't think I will.
With my last ex I got rid of everything straight away and that really helped me. I look back at our relationship and have fairly happy memories, but I never wish I had the photos, cards etc. back.
I guess everyone is different, but for me there is no good that comes from keeping these things. Also makes things easier when I meet someone new.
trying not to contact her because I think it'll make things worse in the long run... I understand what you mean about not being able to be freinds. I dont think I can be freinds with my ex, I love her too much
but I think you're on the right track, dont stay in touch with her. but dont throw away the memories, in the future you'll be able to remember the good times without the heart ache
I have 3 things left in my room. 2 dragon statues and a small toy tiger.
It has been 4 months and I have not seen him, yet he is supposed to contact me in feb. Well febs nearly over. I'm starting to think maybe it is for the best *shrug*
Its up to you, and how you feel on whether you wanna keep things, or whether or not you wanna talk in a few months, years etc.
Thanks for the replies everyone. I haven't looked in the box under my bed since I put it there about a year ago and I don't intend to until I am 100% over her.
You guys are right, I am who I am today because of her - and to be honest, if it wasn't for her, I wouldn't be where I am today. It was because of her that I pushed myself hard in my career (wanting to impress her I guess, she's a trainee lawyer!) and because of that I'm in a great position today!
I think I'm at the stage now where I can move on, I can actually see myself being with someone else and being just as happy again... hopefully even happier!
It's funny how things appear with hindsight. I always thought me and my ex were proper loved up, we both did until maybe a month before the end! But now I look back on it, maybe we wasn't..... We definately were for the first year (we were together 2 1/2 years), but after that things are never as exciting I guess, people get into routines.
I'm looking forward to one day feeling that excitment again that you get a the start of a relationship!
Replicant - I'm feeling your pain, brother :yes:. You probably are already going through the good day/bad day thing. It will get easier pal.
Anyway, for the time being I'm just enjoying my youth. Working hard, playing hard. I can't complain, I've had my fair share of good fortune, I suppose nature had to even the keel for me!
yeah, I still haven't quite decided if I even want to get over her yet :chin: first relationship and all, everything's rather confusing.
still, I'm sure we'll muddle through some how!
Bloody first r/ships *mumble* :grump:
I know how you feel, luckily my ex was never the give you stuff type, or there would have been a very big fire in my back garden at Bonfires last year.
well at least I'm not alone in my confusion. it's mad... I dont hate her, I still want her. makes it all the harder to leave behind when I dont know that I want to leave it behind.
Like I've said, I dont feel that I could be freinds with her, I love her too much.
I'm exactly the same fella. I still love her and that's why I can't be friends with her, or see her, or even communicate by email with her.
You're best to have absolutely no contact with her and just sit it out mate. You'll be OK, it will take a long time to get fully over her, but you will.
Just remember that people break-up everyday. Some have been married for 20 or 30 years. Some seem so happy and you wouldn't bet on them breaking up (like me and my ex).... but they do. That's just society today.
When I broke up with my ex, I didn't expect my parents to understand. My mum was 18 when she married my Dad and they have been married for 26 Years!
But, I got mates who have been through it and they have helped me through it.
Good luck pal.
It's a pain cos I think she feels the same way about me too, which makes it harder.
Yeah mate, I know exactly what you mean. When I split up with the ex, she was always texting and phoning me - I thought that maybe she wanted me back but was too "proud" to say it.
I wanted her back so much, but I didnt say anything... I just stopped repling to her calls and texts and.... I wanted her to want me and for her to tell me she wanted me... but at the same time, I didn't. I knew if we ever had got back together it wouldn't have been the same again and there would always be a doubt there.
I just had a dream about her last night and now i'm missing her again like crazy... But I am dreaming about the girl I used to know, I haven't got a clue what she's up to now... I have changed so much in the last year and I guess she has too.
Back in September, after I saw her with another bloke, I felt like shit for weeks. I went to see a doctor to try and get something to help me deal with it, but she wouldn't give me anything. She said I should drink less and get some exercise!
Well I haven't been drinking less and I'm still not getting enough exercise.... but I've stopped feeling so sorry for myself (well not as much as I did before)!!! It's a cliche, but time is the best healer!!!
In terms of getting over it, it's just about the passage of time. Ride it out, I know it can take a long time to get over the first one......... take care
But I think you cutting off all ties was the smartest thing to do really.
If it was me, I would get rid of the stuff. Or possibly pass it on to a friend, with a note saying "this isn't an action of malice, just a way to move forward" that way she'll know you don't hate her, but you're still not ready for minro relationships (by that I mean friendship)
I really hope it all works out ok