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I don't need friends like these
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
It was my birthday yesterday, most people didn't remember, I spent the day with one person though. She wanted me to go someones party in the evening, but seeing as I felt miserable I said I didn't want to go, to which she called me a jerk (on my birthday) - for some reason this made me start the waterworks lol.
Anyway, ex-girlfriend stepped in and got me a cake and watched dvds and stuff, maybe not the most sensible course of action seeing as she did cheat on me and things, but hey, it was that or be on my own and cry. So today asked my ex-friend if she had a good time, she said yea, said she'd been sending naked pictures of herself to one guy, and trying to grope another, (I think to try and make me jealous as we've been flirting a little recently), then I said I felt bad but the party organiser didn't mind, she said it was good I felt bad, at this point I was pissed off at her since she made me cry on my birthday so I said sarcastically 'yea, it was great that i felt like a shit on my birthday' and then she started to lay into me about how i was being shallow and i think ive got it tough..
at which point I stopped talking to her. I know she stalks me on the net and will come on here and read this (ages ago I posted a link to here on my lj, and she comes on periodically to read everything I write, I don't think she knows I know though, and whenever she 'found out' things about my ex, she said it was from someone at school, but it was actually from her stalking me on here).
Seriously, I really can pick them can't I??? I don't have any bad feeling to my friends who kinda forgot lol.. I mean I did feel a bit unspecial but you know. I just cant abide by people who are going to lay into me for being selfish on my birthday!
Ah fuck it. At least I've got a year til the next one. Thanks for fuck all, Em, if you're reading this.
Anyway, ex-girlfriend stepped in and got me a cake and watched dvds and stuff, maybe not the most sensible course of action seeing as she did cheat on me and things, but hey, it was that or be on my own and cry. So today asked my ex-friend if she had a good time, she said yea, said she'd been sending naked pictures of herself to one guy, and trying to grope another, (I think to try and make me jealous as we've been flirting a little recently), then I said I felt bad but the party organiser didn't mind, she said it was good I felt bad, at this point I was pissed off at her since she made me cry on my birthday so I said sarcastically 'yea, it was great that i felt like a shit on my birthday' and then she started to lay into me about how i was being shallow and i think ive got it tough..
at which point I stopped talking to her. I know she stalks me on the net and will come on here and read this (ages ago I posted a link to here on my lj, and she comes on periodically to read everything I write, I don't think she knows I know though, and whenever she 'found out' things about my ex, she said it was from someone at school, but it was actually from her stalking me on here).
Seriously, I really can pick them can't I??? I don't have any bad feeling to my friends who kinda forgot lol.. I mean I did feel a bit unspecial but you know. I just cant abide by people who are going to lay into me for being selfish on my birthday!
Ah fuck it. At least I've got a year til the next one. Thanks for fuck all, Em, if you're reading this.
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Comments
I DO need those friends! you hear that stalking girl??
anyway, yea.. Fuck them, the fact that she stalks you is actually evidence of incapacity, since she's calling you shallow and tries "not to care about you". Fuck her, you are not her doormat, she'll regret being a dick earlier and more than you will.
And about the birthday thing. Don't mind, I can't tell you the one of my father precisely, my grandma precisely, and from some friends neither. I don't mind if someone forgets my birthday. Many blokes just are like that, even a lof of girls I know.
Make big birthday plans and invite people and don't sit there and wallow around in "oh nobody is thinking of me."
It surely is not guilt... Nobody is perfect, but she does not sound like a utter cunt.
Indeed they do. Nearly everyone forgot mine this year. says me who has forgot my friend's birthday for 2 years in a row; even though I did ask him when it was
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but yeah it does suck and i feel for you. Your mates seem like dicks and your right you dont need people like that
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I think it's the soap effect. As in soap operas. On a soap, someone can die and a week later it's like they never existed.
i wouldn't have shed any tears over it. :no:
found out some of the private stuff I've been posting to my livejournal she has been gossiping with everyone, even people I don't know. I never bothered making it friends only as I trusted the people who knew it, but it's kind of daisychained.
What is wrong with some people? How could she have called me her friend??
Yea, uni soon
One thing that got to me a bit, is that I wrote unflattering things about some people due to circumstances - and to be fair in that light they were justified - but now thats in the past, yet she'd been sending the links to people I didn't know, but who knew the other people, and they got all arsey with me, and I had random people, not insulting on me, but kind of.. bullying... in a small way.
Like one guy asked me if my house was smelly. I said no, he then said 'oh, is it minging then?', I said no, then he said 'scaggy?'. I could have punched him. But that's because he thinks I'm an arsehole for writing stuff on my livejournal, but to be honest it was never his business in the first place, none of the stuff I put on there was untruthful, it was all fact, and the reason I put it on there was to vent and to get support from my friends as I was going through a tough time.
So to bring it up weeks later and start having a go at me about it, because my 'friend' thought it was funny / gossip / wanted to make this other girl suffer, is just, arghh. I mean, I cant really defend myself because if you say mean things about someone then you cant say 'its ok', but given the circumstances (heck, even the girl I said about understands and doesn't blame me) it's understandable, and its infuriating that people I dont know are criticising me for something they're not involved in and don't have any business sticking their noses in, like they know best.
I said to the girl (who i said mean things about) that if he's pissed off at me then we could sort it out the old fashioned way, but she laughed and said I'd snap him in half, lol. I cant be doing with men who bitch 10x worse than women, and hide behind them too.
Sorry, I keep ranting, things are going better now anyway haven't spoken to the shit stirrer and don't really want to.
yeah, but in that issue it's your fault.
It always intrigued me, how people could write, "I FCUECKED BRAD'S GALFRIEND LOL UP THE POOPER!" on their LJ and wonder the next day, why brad is breaking their nosebone. If you don't want it to get read, don't fucking post it online, or at least make it private.
In my case it was more like 'I found out xxx was cheating on me with xxx today. How shit. We broke up.' Kind of thing.. of course it was more drawn out etc. but that's what it was about. I didn't have an issue with it being read, don't you see? I wanted to get it off my chest. The problem is, this was 2 months ago or so now, and its kind of in the past, and then loads of people who werent / arent involved are sent the link by my 'friend' and all start gossiping about it amongst themselves and saying bad things about me, because they dont know what happened and some of them thing I was making crap up to stir shit (but, it wrote it for myself, not for some idiots to go on so they could slag off their friend) and some of them - incredibly - have just been slagging my ex girlfriend off, i.e. their friend.
They never would have known about my journal if it wasnt for my crap friend sending them all the link.
It's like saying someone who leaves their car unlocked that it's their fault for having it nicked. It's partly their fault, but you cant insinuate they deserved it. Some people (and they are a rarity these days) believe in trust.
I don't know, for me there are only two people:
1) who make their LJ private
2) who set it out to have their LJ read.
and maybe
3) those who don't care, but make it private after some bad experience.
Things like that HAPPEN ALL THE TIME... Jesus, I am PhD in Internet for several years now, and there is ALWAYS someone to find some private shit of you and spread it.
My worst experience is a girl I had feelings for who printed chatlogs of our convo and read it out aloud in the breaks when I wasn't around. You just ask for problems if you write bad stuff (JUSTIFIED OR NOT) about people online.
and yea, if I don't lock my car and it gets stolen it's totally my fault. Sorry, I don't leave my car unlocked unless I live in a town with 10 inhabitants where I know everyone. If you leave your car open on purpose then you are stupid! period.
There's two different arguments, one of security - in that, yes, its my fault, because I dont privacy protect it etc., but also one of trust in that it's not my fault, because I placed trust in my friend (and I had actually told her not to go on talking about the stuff to other people, this particular friend, because I was worried it would upset people) and she not only betrayed it, but shit on it.
Depressing but it seems more true these days. Post of the week?
Thing with me, I donit know why, but I always tend to trust people, invest my hope and feelings in people, and a lot of the time they let me down. But I find my being risky and giving out a lot of love, you're more likely to get more back. Of course, there's also all the pitfalls of people screwing you pretty badly...
I see some similarities here.
I have, in the past trusted people way too much. I was in a relationship for over 6 months but it was more like 6 months for hell. I had fallen in love, a mature love where has he stated he loved me but his actions were selfish and immature. That maybe the caomparision between you and your friends. You're probably more mature and grown up than them.
Like with me and my ex, we used to argue over stpid things, but they were caused by him and hurt me a great deal. After a blazing night of rows, i ask him to lets sort it out next day and make a clean slate. He doesn't see the point in that. Or if he did agree, he would say all the same shite again like he's sorry (sometimes he didn't even say that) and I would believe him (well deep inside I didn't but I was desperate for it to work).
I went through hell and back. He tried to give me an overdose, he locked me outside his out for around 12 hours where it rained all night and I was so cold. Still haven't got over that one. He has hit me many times, let me hurt my self as I believed it were my ault. He kisses my friends. He has let his friends come up to me and wack me or hit me for no reason then he would give them blind support. Ah I could go on.
I needed someone to turn too. Turn to my family? No way, it was a gay relationship, my mum doesn't agree with them. Turn to my friends? I tried.
But they were no back bone. They treated my ex as though he was a saint and left me there to cry every night for months. I was really depressed. I had no one. I had no faith in anyone. I was even begging for it but I didn't even get that! I went on depression tablets and had to see someone but they still didn't care! The depression tablets led me to commit suicide, they still didn't care!
Now I don't trust any of them and have got rid of the lot of them. I don't have many friends now. I'm starting to make new ones and I tell them of my experiences and they do seem to have a back bone for me. i mean, they would stick up for me and support me. Which i really need. I go uni next week so that is gonna be a fresh start for me. I've got rid of all the bastards in mjy life. It's been very very hard. being lonely 24/7 is not fun but it has to be done for the sake of your self.
Now only my interests come first. i come first. I may open up and be in a relationship one day and I may have a chose friend/s. But not for a long time.
Absolutely. Trust no one. I have learnt that from bitch so called "friends". I trust a sacred few. Look after yourself mate