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Is it ever acceptable to finish someone over the phone?
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Ok so I want to finish it with my fella, but just due to the circumstances I haven’t seen him for weeks.
Today I was meant to be going to see him but the garage rang to say they could fix his bike today, last week there was another reason as there was the week before (there all real reasons, I can tell when he's lying to me).
I am sure of what I want to do and I'm sure he knows its coming, the relationship has just come to its natural end really and I think I deserve more than something that has fizzled out.
So next time I can see him it will have been a month that I have been trying to do it for. I know the answer is going to be no but do you think that telling him over the phone could be acceptable?
Today I was meant to be going to see him but the garage rang to say they could fix his bike today, last week there was another reason as there was the week before (there all real reasons, I can tell when he's lying to me).
I am sure of what I want to do and I'm sure he knows its coming, the relationship has just come to its natural end really and I think I deserve more than something that has fizzled out.
So next time I can see him it will have been a month that I have been trying to do it for. I know the answer is going to be no but do you think that telling him over the phone could be acceptable?
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Comments
if you can see him without having to stay around then do it in person
how would you like it if he did it to you?
you might not have seen him for a while but he deserves a bit more than that. can't you just go anyway even though he's getting his bike fixed?
Maybe you could call him and say that you don't think things are working out because of the distance and that you really need to see him urgently to talk it over because you'd rather do it in person. At that point he might just be happy to end it over the phone if he's feeling that same as you. If not, at least you've told him there's a problem so you've got some of it off your chest.
At Xmas he informed me that he had decided we needed a break over the phone. He rang me at my works Xmas party to tell me so I know how shit that made me feel. I wouldn’t want to make him feel that bad. But then there’s a part of me that thinks well he didn’t care enough to even wait until I wasn’t at a party let alone see me face to face so why should I? (Petty I know)
I might just turn up at his house Un-announced tomorrow, if he isn’t in then there’s nothing lost I suppose. I get the feeling that although all the reasons that he cant see me are true that its just a bit of a coincidence that something comes up every time were meant to see each other and that he is putting off seeing me as he knows what’s coming.
You drive too slow.
I think all break ups should really be done in person. But if you feel like he's consciously putting off meeting with you, I don't know. He could potentially drag it on for ages. See how your turning up unannounced plan goes I guess.
it takes me about 40-50 minutes to drive 28 miles to uni so..
Basically because i didnt give a toss about him and because i was terrified of him and it had taken me about 6months to build up the courage to do it on the phone.
Ive also had someone finish with me over the phone- and i cared about him a lot. Thing that made it harder was that therea always questions u wanna ask ans he wouldnt give me the chance.
You could always either text him or phone him saying we need to have a serious talk about where our relationship is heading (kind of thing) and then he`ll know whats coming, but you wont be actually dumping him over the phone per se.
but then he had a few days before refused to visit me after a really bad car crash coz he was playing cricket- the team was more important than comforting his GF after a near death experience on the M25
And we have finished. We didnt argue about it or anything, we both knew that it had turned into best mates more than anything else and that it was time to finish it. Its awful. I thort that i would be fine with it, i have known that this is what needs to happen for months but it still hurts like a bitch. 3 years together is such a long time to just throw away.
How do people know that when their relationship turns into a friendship and you try to get it back but you cant that they should finish? how do you know that that isnt what a relationship is? What if i have some big ideas about ever-lasting passion and love my vision doesnt exist? what if iv just thrown away the only relationship that i was ever ment to be in?
fuck. sorry to rant, i didnt expect it to hurt this much, i feel like I've lost a leg or something. im so tempted to ring him up and beg to get back together again :crying:
When I left my ex of 3 years I was very tempted to ring him up and beg him to get back together with me and it usually happened when I was drinking. Deep down though, for a long time I had wanted things to end between us. I never felt the same about him and only wanted him as a friend. However, we are no longer friends. Its for the best though.
For months and months I tried to get our relationship back on track but I quite simply didn't feel the same way he felt about me so had to end things. The relationship came to its natural end.
Of course you haven't thrown away the only relationship you were meant to be in. You will meet someone else. PM me if you wanna chat *hugs*
Hi. Sorry to hear about it I finished it with my other half on saturday as i knew, like you, that it was not meant to be. I managed to make myself look an arse by starting to cry as well, good one huh :rolleyes: But what you've just said above is a normal thought process when you've just split up with someone. I felt exactly the same thing and thought oh shit have i just got rid of the best thing i could have had. But at the end of the day if it's not been right for a while and you've tried your best to keep it going/get it back
then you have probably made the right decision. He meant a lot to you, you're going to debate whether it was the right thing. But at the end of the day it's not fair on either of you if you just cling on to a dead relationship. Only time will show you whether you've made the right call. But whatever you decide well done for doing it face to face and ending it the right way :yes:
I dont think its helping that my 3 best mates have all left uni and moved home and now i feel like i have nothing. I suppose that i just need to get myself sorted instead of sitting here feeling sorry for myself.
I was fine until he rang me before, i had gone out last night, let my hair down and stuff but now i have heard his voice im back where i started.
Poo Poo Poo :grump: