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Stretched in all directions
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hi, Basically i'm stuck with what to do, i have this female friend who people suspect has a crush on me due to how she acts around me (giggling, remarks etc).
But i get on with this girl, nothing would never happen but i enjoy her company and would like to continue being her friend.
Problem is though that my gf is getting bit 'funny' (understandably) with some other girl flirting with me and wants me to stop seein her, or when i do she says "well i aint going out then, if she there"
I understand her feelings but i don't see why i should lose a friend due to her. In essence, i enjoy talking to this girl but then i hate the backlash from the gf who's view i can see. I'm a 3rd yr business student who just wants a easy life
Advice?
But i get on with this girl, nothing would never happen but i enjoy her company and would like to continue being her friend.
Problem is though that my gf is getting bit 'funny' (understandably) with some other girl flirting with me and wants me to stop seein her, or when i do she says "well i aint going out then, if she there"
I understand her feelings but i don't see why i should lose a friend due to her. In essence, i enjoy talking to this girl but then i hate the backlash from the gf who's view i can see. I'm a 3rd yr business student who just wants a easy life
Advice?
0
Comments
It may give her the incentive to stop!
My advice be strong n don't let her dictate where you go and who you spend time with, aslong as you keep your nob in your pants then you aren't doing anything wrong.
But i think maybe you should talk to both girls (this sounds like your a teacher in the playground in junior school!!) tell your girlfriend there is nothing to worry about and go anyway - if she sulks then let her because she will soon see there is nothing between you and your mate
hope it goes ok
In essence i'm starting to see that it'll blow over, but its just difficult when they both together and them both expecting something totally oppisite from me. It often seems like a choice of being offish with the friend to satisfy the gf...or vice versa but i've made the right decision to just carry on being friends with the girl and letting the gf deal with it :yeees:
What you need to do is take the 'threat factor' out of the equation. If you're girlfriend is able to be at ease around this girl and even make a new friend, then she is unlikely to feel 'funny' about your friendship with her.
If you do what Lickalotapuss said, your girlfriend won't feel reassured, will be more arsy about the whole situation, and you'll get pissed off as well and feel more torn. Alhough you don't have the intention of fancying your friend atm, you may end up doing so, because she will seem the more attractive proposition compared to your gf who's annoyed at you.
I've lost quite a few lass mates through the years because of jealous gf's and am telling you when it all goes tits up you begin thinking "why did i fuck my mate off??". I'm not sure how old they are or how long they've being going out but losing mates for a relationship should never happen, birds/boyfs come and go, your mates are there for life.
Oh noes.
She shouldn't be a paranoid clingy fool then, should she?
If your girlfriend doesn't trust you, then its her problem not yours. Sure, reassure her, but why on earth should you stop seeing a good friend just because your bird is the jealous sort? IT's ludicrous.
Part of being with you is having her as your friend. If she can't take that deal, then its her tough luck.
It's a problem that concerns both of you, not just her jealousy. She must be jealous for a reason. So I wouldn't stop seeing your good friend, just stress to your gf that nothing is going to happen. If she continues being jealous, then you've done all you can and it is her being paranoid now.
Lickalotapuss is right that you don't want to lose friends because of gfs/bfs, although question whether your friend is only being overly nice because she has a crush on you, which you say other people have pointed out to you already.
Yeah.
It'll be her nature. Some girls are just clingy and paranoid, usually because of ex-boyfriends or an abject lack of self-esteem.
The fact that the OP hasn't gone off to bonk this other girl should give her all the reassurance she needs.
i just told her how it going to be and not going to put up with her controlling who i see and dont see. she's agreed and apologised so mostly its sorted except for the bit of arkwardness between the two girls but nothing I cant deal with. :wave:
Now that stress is hopefully out the way i can concentrate on my business course instead of bitching girls