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Essential support for under 25s
Essential support for under 25s
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you were basically saying 'because my friends are allowed, i should be allowed too'. where's the logic in this?!
well because the age of consent is 16. perhaps i'm just old fashioned!
but seeing as im 16 i should be allowed anyway....
:eek2:
we haven't really been together for a offical amount of time anyway
i think it matters. my bf wasn't allowed to stay over till i'd been going out with him for just under 2 months. it was much longer with my elder sisters. so if you're not together i'm not surprised they don't let you stay over!
care to elaborate?
In answer to the original question, if you're living under your parents' roof as a dependent then stick to their rules and make a point of proving your maturity to them. It will help if your boyfriend gets to know them better too, as their ability to trust him is as much of an issue as trusting you.
The "my friends are allowed" approach never works with parents...only gets the "if so-and-so jumped off a bridge" reply. Pointless.
my parents aren't particularly strict or old fashioned in any sense, they just like to know a boyfriend before they let him stay at their house.
When my boyfriend (26yrs old) first stayed over at mine we slept in different rooms as my parents said that he could sleep in my brothers room. It was the first time they had meet him and we had only been going out for about 4 months. He was quite happy to abide by their rules. I was 20 at the time, but the youngest child and their only daughter, parents just seem to be a little more protective of their daughts.
It was strange though as I had been staying round his house at the weekend for about 3 months in his room, well I suppose his parents could not really stop him at his age. But when he stayed over about 3 months ago we were told that "we" could sleep in my brothers room. As my parents had got to know him really well over the summer.
yeh, i was always allowed to stay at his house (though his mum didn't allow it..my mum would have let me stay there!). but i think it was a 'not under my roof' sorta thing. so we just stayed at my uni house!
I remember getting that reply, and also "if so and so jumped under a bus....."
Parents sometimes forget that there little girl is growing up, in their eyes you are still their little girl.
Let them get to know your boyfriend first, if you're living under your parents' roof as a dependent, it really is best to stick to their rules. It shows maturity, as you are not trying to under mind them by going behind their backs.
Molly-coddling serves no purpose but to relieve the generally misplaced anxieities of over-protective parents. It's counter-productive.
Learning the ways of life at an early age is character-building and important for a lot of people's self-development. By impeding someone's individual path through life, you're hurting their self-development.
Maybe they are in a relationship where sex is required for the continuance of that relationship, or to take it to a higher level. Maybe they're ready to have sex, want to have sex, and need to have sex in order to fit socially and mature in-line with their friends?
That's all highly likely with 16 year olds.
And what happens if parents try to prevent that someone from having sex, or doing whatever? Arguments, resentment and social problems.
Yes, I hear that along with animal abuse and wetting the bed, not crashing with your boyfriend before you are even old enough to drive yourself over there is one of the similarties in serial killers.
Or...they pout and cry and act like a 16 year old. Then realise in hindsight (like, 6 months down the line) that their parents only have their best interests at heart (often when so-and-so has gone and shat on them from a great height) and that not being allowed to go to their boyfriend's for rumpy pumpy didn't actually "impede their individual path through life" (paraphrased
Then in that case they are going out with a dickhead and shouldn't be allowed to stay round their house.
It's not. I know girls who had over-protective parents and have some sexual problems which translate into social problems...feeling guilt and thinking about what their parents said etc prevents them from fully engaging in the joys of sex.
Remember parents are older than us. There's a generation difference at work.
Asking?!?! At 16 you shouldn't ask - you should do.
If your parents would be worried by it or cause problems then you stay out under a false pretext.
Aye, right!
At 16 if a guy is wanting to have sex and his g/f isn't, then he isn't a "dickhead" for ending the relationship. His needs just aren't being met and it's a mismatch.
If a 30 year old woman wouldn't have sex with a 30 year old man, would you still call the man a dickhead if he looked elsewhere?
I'm 16, I can do what I want, when I want, except for support myself, live on my own, drive and do the necesities of life :crying: I'll go stay with my boyfriend who also lives with his mommy and daddy *stomps off*
(by the way, age of consent is 18, you cannot even smoke till 18, voting, 18, you are legally a child until 18 true, but now remeber this is about staying at your parents and i know that this comment will have people say, yer but american rules are retarded lololololol!!!111)
ETA: I do know the age is 16 there, but its still the same, you cannot even drive at that age. Maybe you could ask the boyfriends parents to pick you up? Maybe they can make you breakfast the next morning and take you to school
but if they've been with their bf/gf for a while, the parents have met them and know them, and as long as they know they're going to be safe at their house then i don't see why they should be refused to stay over, unless of course its a school night
in the UK the age of consent for sex is 16 btw, and you can buy ciggies and play the lottery my_name :yes:
Needs, ha.
Personally i think any guy that dumps a girl because she won't sleep with him, especially if she a 15/16 year old virgin, is a bit of a dickhead. And as you well know there is a lot of difference between 30 year olds and 15 year olds so you can't really compare, but yes the 30 year old guy would still be a dickhead.
In my opinion of course.