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Singles sites, and how long before you ask them out?
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
hi all,
I don't know how many of you have tried using the Singles sites. But i've been on a few of them for a few months now (mainly because i don't have time to pick someone up in a pub or club and what are the chances that you find someone compatible there), without much luck i might add. All the women on there seem to say that they want someone who has never been married before. Just because someones been married doesn't make them damaged goods.
Anyway getting back on track. I've exchanged emails with a few people but not really gone anywhere (after talking to them their more friend materail then girlfriend, future partner). But that was untill 4days ago, i read one profile and it was completely orginal not like any of the others, and it made me laugh and smile. So i paid the fee so i could email this girl.
We've now been emailing and talking on MSN since then. She sounds like all i'm looking for, we have some interests that are similar or the same, shes funny, very smart, into the theatre and arts. But due to both mine and her work loads we're both very busy people, plus shes revising for some exams to do with her work.
I'd like to ask her out somewhere we can both enjoy (drink, shopping, see a show, or art gallery). But as we've only spoken on via MSN and email for 4days would you say that its too soon? Also where would you recommend going for a first date? Its kind of a blind date but we have seen a photo of each other.
Thank you for your thoughts.
I don't know how many of you have tried using the Singles sites. But i've been on a few of them for a few months now (mainly because i don't have time to pick someone up in a pub or club and what are the chances that you find someone compatible there), without much luck i might add. All the women on there seem to say that they want someone who has never been married before. Just because someones been married doesn't make them damaged goods.
Anyway getting back on track. I've exchanged emails with a few people but not really gone anywhere (after talking to them their more friend materail then girlfriend, future partner). But that was untill 4days ago, i read one profile and it was completely orginal not like any of the others, and it made me laugh and smile. So i paid the fee so i could email this girl.
We've now been emailing and talking on MSN since then. She sounds like all i'm looking for, we have some interests that are similar or the same, shes funny, very smart, into the theatre and arts. But due to both mine and her work loads we're both very busy people, plus shes revising for some exams to do with her work.
I'd like to ask her out somewhere we can both enjoy (drink, shopping, see a show, or art gallery). But as we've only spoken on via MSN and email for 4days would you say that its too soon? Also where would you recommend going for a first date? Its kind of a blind date but we have seen a photo of each other.
Thank you for your thoughts.
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Comments
On our first date, when I got back to halls, we just decided to meet up for a couple of drinks in central London. Somewhere quiet so that we could just talk to each other and discover if we really did have as much in common as we thought. That way if it went well we could then get something to eat or ifit went wrong we could just go after the drink. Well we really hit it off, but my boyfriend had to go after a couple of drinks as some family stuff had come up during the day, but he did tell me this when he first arrived at the bar.
Like you we had only seen a photo of each other, I would recommend going somewhere where you can talk to each other such as a quiet bar that does not play loud music. As for if it is too soon only you can really answer that, by judging how you to interact over msn and via email.
But one word of warning, my boyfriend had meet up with a couple of girls before me and they where nothing like how they where in thier emails, they had a completely different personality etc. That was one of the things he liked about me, that I was just like my personality in real life was just like how I was in my emails.
How this helps, sorry I can't be more helpful about where to take her on the first date, as I don't Portsmouth.
I live about 45 minutes away from my boyfriend either by tube when I'm up in halls or by car when I'm back home, it could have been worse I had people from all over Kent and London leaving me messages, I had one person who was about 200 miles away, he seemed really nice, but as I do not currently have a car. Its not worth it as I live just round the conner from a DLR station, so I can be in central London in 15 minutes, I decided it would not be fair on him.
Yeah the Portter House and Maple leaf in covent garden are really nice. or Waxies and Waxies little sister
Obviously meet in a public place for your own safety (and that applies to men as well as women).
Also I think the disappointment will be much less when it doesn't work out if you have spent a long time building up your hopes.
Meeting place doesn't have to be a pub - if it's a nice day then a walk can be a very pleasant thing.
Would it bother any of you if you were getting to know someone and then find out they are seperated and getting a devorce. And would you thing that their damaged somehow?
But when I was looking on line for my boyfriend I must admit that I was only looking for people that had not been married, but then again I was only 20 at the time and I did not think i could handdle any exess baggage.
However if you are both say late 20 or even in your 30s people these days are more willing to expect that you may have been married before. (that was really well worded but hopefully you understand what I'm trying to say).
Theres no point pretending youre not seperated/divorcing etc. If she doesnt understand then shes not that perfect is she?
Girlsdateforfree.com
matchmeuk.com
Yahoo
Match.com
Dateline.com
but your'll find that you have to pay to send messages or read the messages from most. i registored on a few but only paid if i found someone i really want to talk to.
i think where a lot of people fail, is where they assume they "pick up people"
anyone in their right minds shouldnt think that way, just cause on the off chance a lady might find it degrading
I'm not sure how best to approach the subject though. It's a bit of an awkward one really, isn't it? I'd tell her not too soon because it could put her off but don't leave it too long either because then it could seem like you are lying to her or deliberately concealing the truth.
Avoid talking too much about your ex: Avoid bitching about her because this will make you seem bitter and avoid talking too fondly of her as it may make it seem like you still have feelings for her.
Just been reading this topic, there are some free sites out there
loopylove.com Tried got more messages when not paying :-)
Girlsdateforfree.com Didnt even sign up on this one, but Im on it :-(
matchmeuk.com Yes this is free to send and receive and Im on it
Yahoo Not tried this one yet, may do
Match.com Hehe there up at court for conning people
Dateline.com Remorgage ya house lol
I used a dating site before to meet my girlfriend, im more 50/50 but it dont hurt to try and can be a laugh
Kev
they should open up boysdatefora-fee lol
Im sticking to one
:crazyeyes
hi ppl , i'm helen,
the only singles site i use is www.matchmeuk.com
this one really is free, i've been on it for about a year now and have met loads of new people.
i have been on alledged free sites that try to charge you after you sign up, but find matchme free and easy to use
helen x
I see ya got my email, well let me welcome you to here x
Are ya gunna be in chatroom later, I fancy a chat
Kev