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From The Guardian - 13/10/2005 (364 words)
Guardian Features Pages
Stephen Moss
The press, with the exception of this BBC-friendly paper, is working itself up into a fine lather over the corporation's inflation-busting licence fee request, which, say the Beeb-haters, will mean us paying pounds 180 a year by 2013 to watch tedious rugby league (the only sport Sky doesn't want exclusively) and repeats of The Two Ronnies. But what does pounds 180 actually buy you these days? Here are some current offers; whether they match up to 12 months of Natasha Kaplinsky and John Humphrys is for you to decide.
* Flights to Dubrovnik on British Airways, New York on Air India, Cyprus on Excel Airways, a charter to the Canaries or Tunis, London-Aberdeen on BA City Express.
* A double room for one night at the Royal Park Hotel in Bayswater, an exclusive boutique-style five-star hotel.
* A fully flexible second-class return from London to Manchester on Virgin.
* Cloud Nine divan and headboard measuring 4ft 6in with upholstered base and fully sprung medium-firm mattress, hand-tufted to provide minimum wear and maximum durability, from Argos.
* Mira Sport 9kW electric shower in a white or chrome finish, with flexible hose, riser rail and soap dish, three spray patterns and limescale-resistant showerhead, also from Argos.
* Limited edition copy (with slipcase) of Julian Barnes's Arthur and George, from LMS Books of St Albans.
* Complete year's run of Picturegoer magazine - all 52 issues from 1956 or 1957 - from Ian Pedler of Paulton, near Bristol.
* Samsung e720 mobile phone, with video capture and playback, built-in mega-pixel camera, bluetooth, MP3 player, double minutes and messages.
* Second-hand Prada suit from Retro Man in Notting Hill.
* Hoover Dustmaster "pets" upright vacuum cleaner, from Littlewoods.
* Brand new Maggie Sottero dress, size 8-12, on eBay.
* Peugeot 206 alloy wheels, Nemesis 6.0 x 14, five-spoke, 3 piece, brand-new alloys, all boxed, from Loot.
* Jack Russell puppies, rare miniature, outstanding looks, temperament and marking, wormed, vet checked, loving family pet, best around, from Loot.
* A full Sky subscription for four months, one week and two days *
I get to choose whether to buy the bed from Argos. I don't have to pay Argos £180 regardless of whether I buy the bed or not.
If you are happy to be forced to pay for Natasha Kaplinksy with threat of imprisonment, then fine. But I don't think that not paying the Beeb it's disgusting and vile tax is worthy of being chucked in the slammer, or having a grand nicked out of your wage.
OMG. You need help.
Besides, I don't mind paying for her to read the news. I do mind paying for her taxi to lunch though