Flirting

Former Member · February 2001

Originally posted by Quicksilver:
What do u ppl think about flirting whilst in a relationship??
I've got a g/f with whom i am perfectly happy with, but her younger sister and her best mate fancy me as well, i quite like them too but i wouldnt leave my current g/f for either of them, however i do flirt with them quite alot by making suggestive comments, puttting my arm around them etc, the trouble is i dont know what my g/f thinks about this, its all harmless fun but do u think its possible it could ruin our relationship, especially seeing as its her sister?
What do u think about it in general?

In general i reverse the roles. Would I be happy if my gf was flirting with my brother and his best mate (who i know or suspect fancy her)? The answer is no I wouldnt and because of that I wouldnt do it if i was thinking of doing it.

"Is sex dirty? Only if its done right."
- Woody Allen

Former Member · February 2001

I reckon its wrong for you to flirt.I think knowing that you've got admirers has given you an ego boost and you dont want them to lose interst therefore yr kinda leading them on.you wabt them to carry on thinking yr a great man.I dont think yr girlfriend would be happy.Only those kind of suggestive movements should be made towards her.I certainly wouldnt be happy if my boyfriend does what you do.I'm not having a go at you but I think you shouldnt flirt but I can understand why you do.It doesnt matter if they dont lose interest-you've got yr girlfriend and plus if you lead the girls on it may lead to many things-confusion,rejection,revenge and maybe cheating.Just be careful and stop.

Former Member · February 2001

You shouldn't flirt with these girls, i don't know their ages but they are probably young and impressionable and could easily get the wrong idea. You could hurt them and ur girlfriend. It's ok as a bit of fun, but they mite b takin it more seriously than you.

Also, i wouldn't like it if the roles were reversed like city_boy sed. Flirting can b fun, just make sure you don't hurt anyone!

Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road. Time grabs you by the wrist, directs you where to go.

Former Member · February 2001

Cheers 4 the advice peeps, I can c what city boy means, adn after thinking about it 4 a while i decided that it wasnt really fair on my g/f, so i guess ill stop, except there tends to be another prob, its usually them that make the first move, usually just by stroking my arm or sommit, but i guess i'll just ignor it eh?

Who the hell am i?

Former Member · February 2001

Yup i think you should definately ignore it! I don't think your girlfriend would be very pleased if she knew you were flirting with other girls, especially if you're flirting with her sister and best mate! You just don't do that! Mind you, it doesn't say much about her sister and best mate if they flirt with you!
Well good luck with ignoring your admirers <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif">

Former Member · February 2001

If they start flirting with you say to them something like "shouldnt you be finding your own bf?","no thanks, im taken" or "try finding someone your own age" but keeping it in a jokey manner. See if this stops them.

"Is sex dirty? Only if its done right."
- Woody Allen

Former Member · February 2001

Originally posted by city_boy:
If they start flirting with you say to them something like "shouldnt you be finding your own bf?","no thanks, im taken" or "try finding someone your own age" but keeping it in a jokey manner. See if this stops them.

Alternitavely, take them aside when they do and just ask them nicely "listen, my gf is getting a bit upset by you seeming to get close to me. it would be nice if you maybe just kept your distance for the time being."

summin like that. i'll look in the morning to see if there's anythign more worthwhile to put. probably not, hmmm...i wonder if this makes sesne, since i typed it all with my eyes closed.

I don't live to work, I work to live and I live at the weekends. I'm the last of the big time drinkers.

Former Member · February 2001

Originally posted by city_boy:
If they start flirting with you say to them something like "shouldnt you be finding your own bf?","no thanks, im taken" or "try finding someone your own age" but keeping it in a jokey manner. See if this stops them.

Defintiely keep it in a jokey manner otherwise u cud really piss them off. But if they still keep doin it then i guess you'd just have to tell them outright!

Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road. Time grabs you by the wrist, directs you where to go.

Former Member · February 2001

Originally posted by Drifter:
Defintiely keep it in a jokey manner otherwise u cud really piss them off. But if they still keep doin it then i guess you'd just have to tell them outright!

But if it's in a jokey manner, they may not get what you're trying to say. Talk to them seriously, and just ask them to back off. Why would they get pissed off? If they like you - and if they are some sort of friend - they will respect your wishes and back off.

I don't live to work, I work to live and I live at the weekends. I'm the last of the big time drinkers.

Former Member · February 2001

i don't see that there is anything wrong with flirting when you're in a relationship. i do it all the time. but then i cheat on men all the time too, i think its my feminist revenge for all the years of women putting up with shit from men.

i'm not denying that women are stupid; God made us to match the men.

Former Member · February 2001

Im Daniels mate, and he thinks that everyone loves him!

Dont judge me, LOVE ME!

Former Member · February 2001

Originally posted by whizzygirl:
i don't see that there is anything wrong with flirting when you're in a relationship. i do it all the time. but then i cheat on men all the time too, i think its my feminist revenge for all the years of women putting up with shit from men.

interesting philosophy, whizzy. question though, how is it really revenge when while one man does suffer, another is getting what he wants? wouldn't make more sense not to sleep with any of them if you wanted to get back at them?

not making fun or anything, just curious as to how u decided that constant cheating is a form of revenge.

Former Member · February 2001

Ignor that nobend, HES the one who thinks every one loves him!

(but they dont)

Who the hell am i?

Former Member · February 2001

OK, lets take a vote on this. Who likes me more than Dan?

Dont judge me, LOVE ME!

Former Member · February 2001

Shut up prick...

Who the hell am i?

Former Member · February 2001

It always seems okay when ur the one doing the flirting, cause then it's "harmless."

But it's not so okay when ur significant other is doing it, is it?

So if you're doing it "harmlessly", ask your love one how they feel about and if it does bother them, then maybe you should put an end to it, if you love them.

And if you see it happen from your loved one, you gotta let them know it bothers you, otherwise a lot of resentment is going to build up.

I guess my advice is just to be cognizant of what you are doing all the time because everything has an effect on your relationship, whether it's "harmless" or not.

Former Member · February 2001

Flirting is harmless!!!

its fun..
its easy..
its even better wen ur bf doesnt find out..

from past experience..
ive got a boyfrend! weve been 2gether 4 about 5 months, i still flirt wen im not with him. im sure he does it aswell.
I just make sure it doesnt go further than flirting. coz i love him!!

Flirting

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