Home Politics & Debate
If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Options

Rape and it's consequences.

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Please read this:

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/printFriendly/0,,1-7-1398770,00.html

Just wanted to share this story with y'all, it's so beautiful and inspiring, i don't think i could be that brave in the same situation...

Comments

  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i've heard about her. she's pretty inspiring.

    i couldn't do the same in her position though, i have to admit. i wouldn't see it as killing 'my innocent child'. i would see it as solving a problem.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    She made a private decision and good for her.

    What worries me is how the pro-life lobby will (and have) hijacked this story.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Her body, her choice, good for her.
    What worries me is how the pro-life lobby will (and have) hijacked this story.

    After all, women who are raped can't really speak for themselves; they don't know what they are doing and although rape is a violation of their body - abortion would be an even bigger violation! (Have even read people on lj stating that abortion due to rape is worse than the rape itself). :rolleyes:
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Re: Rape and it's consequences.
    Originally posted by dolly dagger
    Just wanted to share this story with y'all, it's so beautiful and inspiring, i don't think i could be that brave in the same situation...

    Personally I think making the decision to have an abortion in such a circumstance would be equally as brave.

    It is wonderful to see her husband stand by her though, many men wouldn't and I can understand why.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Re: Re: Rape and it's consequences.
    Originally posted by BumbleBee
    Personally I think making the decision to have an abortion in such a circumstance would be equally as brave.

    It is wonderful to see her husband stand by her though, many men wouldn't and I can understand why.

    True, whether you choose to have your rapists baby or an abortion, they are both imposed on you on top of the awful act of rape.

    Nevertheless, although rape and the subsequent abortion would stay with a person for the rest of their life, I think it is much braver to have the baby, and deal with the mutiple issue that arise from that, not just the act of giving birth to it, but raising it and loving it so much.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by dolly dagger
    True, whether you choose to have your rapists baby or an abortion, they are both imposed on you on top of the awful act of rape.

    Nevertheless, although rape and the subsequent abortion would stay with a person for the rest of their life, I think it is much braver to have the baby, and deal with the mutiple issue that arise from that, not just the act of giving birth to it, but raising it and loving it so much.
    I wonder if they'll tell her.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Kentish
    I wonder if they'll tell her.

    Even if they don't tell her she'll find out. The parents names are printed for all to see. If they don't tell her then I'm sure some cruel kid will do it one day.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by go_away
    Her body, her choice, good for her.



    After all, women who are raped can't really speak for themselves; they don't know what they are doing and although rape is a violation of their body - abortion would be an even bigger violation! (Have even read people on lj stating that abortion due to rape is worse than the rape itself). :rolleyes:

    having the baby, and having an abortion on a baby that itself had done nothing wrong, are both as equally harrowing choices to make

    as long as she believes in what shes doing, good for her

    pro-life people will jump on this like wildfire
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by BumbleBee
    Even if they don't tell her she'll find out. The parents names are printed for all to see. If they don't tell her then I'm sure some cruel kid will do it one day.
    I doubt she'll have the rapist's name on the birth certificate. I would've thought that the woman's husband would be the legal father.

    (Can we be sure that the rapist was the father?)
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by wheresmyplacebo
    pro-life people will jump on this like wildfire
    Do people usually jump on wildfire?
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i dont think we should even vbe having this discussion, its not as if any of us have the right to tell anyone what to do with their body, well i guess due to free speech etc we do, but most people around here have not been raped and fallen pregnant, so henceforth cant talk about it
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by MrG
    but most people around here have not been raped and fallen pregnant, so henceforth cant talk about it

    That doesn't mean other people aren't going to have opinions on the matter and speak their minds about it. It's absurd not to expect that or ask people to do otherwise.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    yes but should be be talking about rape in this manner, in the politics and debate thread where everyone has an opinion, wouldnt sex forum be better, due to the advice and/or discussion of rape been a sensitive issue and not really wanting everyones 5p for their thoughts.

    saying the wrong things, not necessarily in your eyes, but saying the wrong thing on here can potentially hurt a rape victim very much, and things get heated easily in here, plus in here there are a lot of people who *MUST BE RIGHT* and tend not to have informed opinions
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Kentish
    (Can we be sure that the rapist was the father?)

    yus.

    because the woman and her husband are both white, the rapist is black and the child is mixed race.

    and they already have told the daughter about what happened. she's only nine though. maybe a bit young to really understand...
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by kaffrin
    yus.

    because the woman and her husband are both white, the rapist is black and the child is mixed race.

    and they already have told the daughter about what happened. she's only nine though. maybe a bit young to really understand...
    Ah. Bit of a giveaway.

    I had a friend at school who was adopted and he reacted really badly when he was told - he was about 15 at the time. But being told that your father raped your mother. I can't imagine what effect being told that would have.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Kentish
    I doubt she'll have the rapist's name on the birth certificate. I would've thought that the woman's husband would be the legal father.

    (Can we be sure that the rapist was the father?)

    I have read on to discover the child already knows, but what I was suggesting is that this case has been reported and the names of the mother and (non biological) father given. With it being common knowledge surely some kid or another would tell her anyway, as kids do. Y'know, one parent lets it slip about such-and-such up at the school, a child overhears, spreads the gossip... I wasn't referring at all to a birth certificate of any kind. :confused:
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by BumbleBee
    I have read on
    Yeah, I didn't you see....that's where I went wrong.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i dont think you can ever have an real opinion on rape, its consequences and abortion after rape, until you or someone you love has been through it.

    from what i hear the consquences are veyr long lasting and come in phases, silly things can remind the victim of the situation, a person who looks like the rapist, or the setting etc etc. i dont think its something you can ever get over.

    as for the abortion side of it, you cant really know how youd feel unless put in that situation... sometimes it can scare the victim so much, it was obviously unplanned, and they may not want to bring a child into the world that reminds them of the rape, or they may be too young (they feel) to have a child etc etc

    its a tough one though.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by redstar
    i dont think you can ever have an real opinion on rape, its consequences and abortion after rape, until you or someone you love has been through it.

    Of course you can have an opinion on something like that. I'm sure most normal people are of the opinion that rape = not a good thing. Are you suggesting we can't have that opinion unless we've been through it?

    I think you're confusing 'having an opinion' with 'knowing how we'd feel'
Sign In or Register to comment.