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abortion
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
i dnt know if this is the right place to post this topic but here goes. what are all your views on abortion, i personally hate the idea but it seems its my only option, i feel like im being forced into it. if i dont my mum will kick me out and i really do not know what other option i have, as im goin on holiday the only chance it has 2 b dun im passed 8 weeks so i have to have the surgical one and as i see it, its being sucked out of me and thrown in the bin. does anyone have any clues to what i can do? every option seems blank. please help
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ive had an abortion before, and ive also had a baby. You need to decide what to do, but if your views on abortion are as you say, then I think you would take it hard and it might not be the right choice for you. Think carefully and dont be pressured into it if you dont want to do it. Your mum wont kill you, she might be a bit disappointed at first but that is the wrong reason for doing it.
I can understand from seeing what she went through how girls are too scared to tel their parents and quite frankly even now at nearly 23, if my mom found out I was pregnant I would be thrown out and cast out of the family. Sad but some familys are not perfect.
Firtsly blood junkie-you need to confide in someone you trust entriley-someone who isnt gonna blab to their mates because you will need someone with you if you go through with it.
I really think you shold get some counselling quickly to help to ensure you have made the right choice. My mate chose to abort straightaway and I dread it in ten years time if she regrets.
If you want anyone to have a moan/ask questions/help in any way please feel free to pm me and I'll try to help ya-I won't tell you what to do or not do!!!
sorry, I can't be arased to read all the replies and see if I'm repeating what others have said
I think abortion should be available to those who need it due to unfortunate circumstances. (I.E. If the mother/babies life is at risk/will be of very poor quality, or the baby was conceived as a result of rape). I don't however, agree with using it as a form of contraception, as this is due to irresponsible and careless behaviour. Of course, there's bound to be cases where girls of 13 become pregnant, and you need to review the situation and think "Ok, well she was in the wrong, but what type of life is she going to lead?" etc. It's had to say whether abortion is 'right' or 'wrong' as it's the type of issue where each case needs to be studied seperately to work out the best solution.
Abortion isn't the only option, as others have said. You can continue with the pregnancy and give the baby up to be adopted, or keep the baby. Have you talked to your mum about it? Perhaps she was shocked initially, but has now had the chance to calm down. She really should take the time to listen and discuss your options with you.
I was totally shocked by this number!!
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Try and be more supportive rather than slagging. Shes got to make whatever decision is right for her - not for you, because I dont see anyone here offering to adopt the baby.
Also do you really think youd be able to go through that and hand the baby over at the end of it? I dont think I could.
Theres a lot to think about here, especially since youre only 15.
this is what happened to my best mate. the used protection, noticed it was torn. then she took the morning after pill the very next day-no throwing up or dose of the trots yet she still got unlucky. It was annoying as there are many ppl who are alot more careless and get away with it-while she id everything she could to stop it.
Blood:I think you need to have a big think chuck-what you will be doing for the next 9 or so many months.
Rainbow brite-once again you're a star in this place! You should be a mod!
I never said it was. What I did say, was I think it's wrong for people to be lazy and use abortion as a form of contraception because they couldn't be bothered to use a condom etc. I didn't say it's irresponsible behaviour if the contraception fails.
I know sorry I was just suggesting.
Just wanted to agree with this, please keep this thread to advice and support or go to politics.
We have a couple of articles that may help you:
I'm pregnant, what now?
Should I have a baby?
How can I have an abortion?
Both Brook and the FPA or your GP or nearest sexual health clinic can also offer you advice and help you make an informed decision. I'd recommend you talk to one of these professionals to work out what it is that will be right for you at this moment in your life. You can then talk things through with your mum and explain maturely why you have made whatever decision you do.
Also, the very fact that you are pregnant means you could have caught an STI, so you should get tested
Have i got an STI? Visiting a GUM clinic
If you want to find out more about contraception, all our sex factsheets can be found here
British Pregnancy Advisory Service
Information and counselling on pregnancy issues, abortion and fertility.
Telephone: 0845 730 4030
Brook Advisory Centres
Advice, counselling and medical help around contraception, pregnancy, abortion and sexual health.
Telephone: 0800 0185023
Family Planning Association
Information service on family planning and all aspects of sexual health.
Helpline: 0845 3101334
Take care lovely,
Susie
good luck and take care xx
I was 18 when i had an abortion, i had nothing to give to the baby-no money, no home and no life. Would you respect me more if i had kept the child and brought it up on a council estate, sponging off the government and dragging the child up to the best of my ability? those are the people i dont have respect for. Children should be brought into this world to be given the best of life that they can, and in these circumstances that is not possible!
Why? At the end of the day it's the woman's body and life that's going through changes and shouldn't she be allowed to choose what happens?
Not to mention that bringing a child in to an insecure home, or one where it can't be provided for is not only unfair to the child itself, but may also have an impact on society.
to me it sounds like you want this baby. please dont abort it just because your mum isnt being supportive as you will regret it.
I have had an abortion and have never regretted it, so have a hell of a lot of people. Its not always the hugely traumatic event that anti abortionists would have you believe.
Some people are affected by it for longer but youve also got to take into account that statistically 15 year olds dont make great parents (some do, i know, sorry badabing) but most dont. they dont have the resources, life experience, maturity, money, family, etc to be able to give a child everything it deserves. Wanting a baby isnt always a good enough reason to have one. It will stop your education in its tracks, your chances of getting a career are greatly reduced. youre likely to never get more than a minimum wage job, therefore putting yourself in the poverty trap for a long time.
Basically the odds are stacked against you, big time. It is EXTREMELY hard work raising a child. I find it a nightmare sometimes and im 28 married with my own house and have two incomes, I also have a lot of family support and its still really hard some days. Babies dont love you back, thats a common misconception, they are extremely needy, they need feeding every few hours (at least) day and night. You wont get more than a few hours sleep at a time. Then they start becoming mobile, theyre a danger to themselves and you have to stop them injuring themselves constantly. Your body changes, you put on weight, you get saggy breasts, stretchmarks, you might even tear your vagina in childbirth. its not pretty and its not shallow to consider how this might affect you having to go through this at such a young age. having a child could certainly hinder your chances at relationships in the future.
I really feel sorry for you falling pregnant at such a young age especially since you feel so conflicted about it.
Of course having a child isnt all bad. It can also be very rewarding sometimes. My son woke up 3 or 4 times a night till he was 2 years old. I didnt mind the not being able to go out with friends, because I had the chance to do all that beforehand.
Teenage years once youve left school are so much fun. You have so many opportunities, if you become a mother, all of this goes down the pan. Think about it.
Yes its sad but nobody WANTS to have a termination, but sometimes its the only choice.
all i meant was that if she really wants this baby, then she shouldnt abort it because her mum doesnt approve. and i said it was my personal opinion. so please dont bite my head off
Theres a lot more to raising a child than just wanting a baby.
i can see where you're coming from. but i've recently met some mum's who are 15 and 16 and they are brilliant mums.
we dont know her, she could be very mature and could fully understand what she's letting herself in for.
I doubt it. I don't honestly think ANY first time mum does.
That is so true, no matter how much you think you do.
i mean as much as she, or any new mum, can