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temporary, super unofficial, community support thread (for those looking for support after GC's)

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Comments

  • AnimalloverbAnimalloverb Posts: 316 The Mix Regular
    @Cutelivejazz
    Hey not a problem, I care about you.
    And your not at all bothering me, you deserve support.

    I totally understand that, starting education, especially like six form can be really scary.
    I am so sorry all of that has happened to you, you didn't deserve any of that. Social side of things can always be tricky, people stay with their groups and just don't seem to let anyone else join. Hopefully you will make some Friends that deserve you, there is no point wasting time on people who Don't appreciate anything about you.

    And with the academic side of things, that's totally understandable. A levels are more tricky to what you are used to learning, and they may feel like more pressure. But trust me you are smart. And it's okay if you do fail, non of your grades define your worth. I know someone who failed history a few times and they really wanted to become a history teacher and they eventually made it and now they are doing really well and have gotten a job as a history teacher.
    It's okay for grades to drop, you are able to pick them back up again, loads of my grades dropped and I failed quite a few things but I put in the work and effort and I eventually managed to pass.

    If people judge you for grades then that says so much more about them then it does you.

    You know all you can do is your best, and that's all that matters.
  • CutelivejazzCutelivejazz Posts: 107 The Mix Convert
    @Animalloverb thanks for trying to help. It's not that simple tho and in the politest kindest way possible you don't really get it. Im really sorry if im coming off as rude I don't mean it in a rude way im just trying to be honest it's not just grades it's all the effort the waking up at 5am every morning going to bed at 1am pulling all nighters draining myself I put in so much effort for those grades I worked myself to exhaustion and with the social aspect its not just about the bulling or making friends its also the effort I put in like if I know my friend isn't okay I drop everything I stay online I won't go to sleep if they need to talk ill do anything to help them but other people just don't like ill ask if we can talk and they'll say they're tired but half an hour later they'll be on a video game and when I text them they only respond in the morning saying they were asleep that hurts. I just feel like im too much sometimes people ask me why I care so much and to be honest it's because I know what it feels like to think no one cares so if I can be one person who cares about them then im happy
  • AnimalloverbAnimalloverb Posts: 316 The Mix Regular
    edited 11:47AM
    @Cutelivejazz
    Your not being rude at all, and I am so sorry if I'm not helping. You deserve someone who can give you the right support and understand you. I am sorry I am not that person for you. Hopefully somebody else here will be able to help you better then I can. You don't have to be sorry. I am so proud of you for speaking up, that's a really brave thing to do.

    It does sound exhausting. And I am so sorry that you are putting in all this effort and feel like your getting nowhere, that must be really difficult.
    I can't really help with how exhausting it is for you pulling all nighters as I never really sleep and I get up to 4 hours max when I do sleep so I can't relate to that, so I am sorry I am unable to give you any support with that.

    I have been there, if a friend ever needs me I am right there no matter what I am doing, a few years ago now, I had a friend and she was really struggling with her mental health and I was on high alert 24/7 incase she ever needed me, day and night, I was always there. I ignored my own mental health and my own problems to be there for her, and doing that can be so exhausting and can affect how much studying you do. Unfortunately though she did pass away as I didn't get to her quick enough and that has stuck with me, so even now I still turn up for people no matter what time it is that is why I am not always active on here on an evening when you need the most support because I have other people needing my help that I am trying to support.

    It is awful the way that you do all that for others and when you want to talk they never show up for you and lie and say they are tired or were sleeping when you know they weren't at all.

    I am so sorry you are going through all of this and I do apologise that I am not much help for you. You deserve so much more. Thank you for opening up though, you are doing great.
  • CutelivejazzCutelivejazz Posts: 107 The Mix Convert
    edited 2:42PM
    @Animalloverb im sorry to bother you again but im really struggling can we chat if you aren't busy
  • AnimalloverbAnimalloverb Posts: 316 The Mix Regular
    Yes of course @Cutelivejazz
    I can chat for now, but if I do start taking longer to respond I do apologise.
  • CutelivejazzCutelivejazz Posts: 107 The Mix Convert
    edited 3:03PM
    @Animalloverb don't worry about taking long to reply thats fine. I'm struggling and im feeling really anxious like I have that tight feeling in my chest it doesn't help that school start tomorrow so I have to be up at 7:30 at the latest. Im still sick i barely have any energy to function so I feel exhausted. I got my period on Monday and im having really bad cramps its happens all the time for me but its hard for me to stand without feeling like im dying im also feeling dizzy and feel faint every time I stand up everything starts spinning. When I got a blood test I was told my iron was slightly below normal so ive been taken supplements but nothings really changed im just so fucking tired of dealing with this and at this point it's not a cycle its whenever my body fucking feels like it and it's been affecting my mental health its a pain living in the constant anxiety of getting my period and ive missed school because of it I've had to be sent home and now im stuck waiting for an ultrasound appointment that I got when I was on holiday so had to reschedule and they said it was a 20 week wait which sucks and i can't keep dealing with this pain it's affecting my day to day life and its like pain is like down my legs and back and chest and I lose my appetite so I always get forced to eat I just don't know what im going to do tomorrow at school guess I just have to keep dying. Im sorry for talking about it but its unbareable at this point and nothings working not even prescription painkillers and its also affecting my mood and mental health like I feel down and just worse.
  • CutelivejazzCutelivejazz Posts: 107 The Mix Convert
    @Animalloverb I know it sounds silly and like stupid especially since most people experience worse and actually pass out (thankfully I have never) but as I mentioned its negative affected my quality of life and mental health too. And sometimes I get comments which just makes me want to punch a wall haha
  • AnimalloverbAnimalloverb Posts: 316 The Mix Regular
    @Cutelivejazz
    I hear how much you’re going through right now. It sounds incredibly overwhelming. Dealing with pain, exhaustion, anxiety, and the pressure of school starting tomorrow all at once. I want you to know that it is okay to let it all out here and you do not need to apologize for talking about what you’re going through.

    The severe pain and dizziness/faintness really doesn't sound good at all and it sounds quite scary to be experiencing. It is quite concerning that standing makes you dizzy and makes you feel like everything spins, especially with your history of low iron. I have also got a history of low iron and the supplements I was given helped, but it can be scary.

    The Pain that is spreading to your back, legs, and chest sounds so awful for you and it must be so annoying that the prescription painkillers not helping and personally to me that suggests this isn’t just “normal cramps.” I would recommend trying to get another opinion on that.

    These things Impacting on daily life and mental health  missing school, losing appetite, and feeling hopeless is such a heavy load to carry. And I am so sorry that you are experiencing and going through all of this.

    Because your symptoms are this intense and aren’t improving, I would recommend you to see a docto or even try and go to a&e if you’re struggling to stand, feeling faint, or your pain is unbearable. You shouldn’t have to wait 20 weeks in this state as that just isn't fair. I know it may not be possible though, I know how awful are healthcare systems can be sometimes.

    If your chest tightness gets worse, or if you faint, can’t breathe properly, or the pain becomes unbearable I would say call emergency services.

    For school tomorrow: If you’re too unwell, it might be best to let the school know and not force yourself they may not be happy with it but your health has to come first. Even one more day of rest might make a difference. If that's not possible I totally understand but please look after yourself.

    Keep hydrating and eating small, foods like soups, smoothies, rice, crackers are things you could try and eat if full meals feel impossible. Low iron plus blood loss can worsen dizziness.

    For cramps, sometimes combining heat so maybe a heating pad or hot water bottle on your abdomen/back with gentle stretching can help alongside the medication though I know you have tried so much already.

    And about your mental health, feeling like this constantly can wear anyone down. You don’t have to go through it alone. If you ever feel like you can’t cope or like you don’t want to keep going, please reach out right away whether that’s calling a crisis line, talking to a trusted friend/family member, or letting a teacher know what’s happening. You don't deserve to be alone. There are services you can call. And you have us here.

    You are not weak for struggling with this, your body is putting you through an enormous amount, and it makes total sense you’re feeling the way you do.
  • AnimalloverbAnimalloverb Posts: 316 The Mix Regular
    I may take a little while to reply but please Don't be scared to keep posting as much as you feel the need to I will respond as soon as I possibly can. I'm here for you
  • CutelivejazzCutelivejazz Posts: 107 The Mix Convert
    @Animalloverb thanks. Yeah ive tried heat therapy and other things that are usally recommended but bc im only 16 the doctors usally assume that im overreacting or just have a low pain tolerance and a&e won't do shit when I told my doctor I bled a lot she asked if my mom had checked which I felt like was a super invasive question as if I can't tell what a lot of blood is I have to sleep paranoid of bleeding through and using the overnight pads just as protection. Im just exhausted of constantly having to explain to doctors and them not taking it seriously like I assumed bc the doctors were female they'd understand or have some empathy but they were just acting as if I was a nuisance it felt like they weren't looking for a n underlying cause just treating the pain the most recent doctor i went to was nice she genuinely really tried she put me on birth control and I had breakthrough bleeding which pissed me off sm bc I was told it was basically guaranteed to not happen so I was basically lied to and I just feel like this isn't treated as seriously as it should be it already took me 4 years to convince my mom I shouldnt have to convince doctors that this isn't normal but oh well 🫠
  • AnimalloverbAnimalloverb Posts: 316 The Mix Regular
    @Cutelivejazz
    Doctors can be like that unfortunately, it shouldn't be like that but it is the way our broken system is. From my opinion I would keep fighting with them, it may feel awful to do but it will help you get somewhere as I have had to do it for so many different reasons, like for example I have epilepsy but they weren't even going to look into anything when I started having seizures, they told me it was stress or trauma induced but I fought back and ended up having epilepsy and being diagnosed with severe epilepsy.

    I know someone who is having a similar problem to you regarding the bleeding and they actually have a condition and she had to fight for so many years for them to even put her on the waiting list to get checked. It's awful.

    It does sound really fustrating and I am so sorry about that. I do really hope things get sorted for you though.
  • CutelivejazzCutelivejazz Posts: 107 The Mix Convert
    edited 3:52PM
    @Animalloverb yeah your right. It's just annoying if you don't have a condition that's easy to diagnose they just assume it's normal (sorry you had to deal with all that). Im nervous because the most recent doctor mentioned having to refer me to an OBYGN if nothing comes of the ultrasound which im actually kinda terrified of but I mean it's something.
  • AnimalloverbAnimalloverb Posts: 316 The Mix Regular
    It's okay to be scared but it's a step in a direction to figuring out what is going on.
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