Don't wanna go on holidays

Redemption

I’ve decided not to go on a holiday right now because I want to focus on getting a job first, which I’m actively working toward. It’s not that I don’t want fun experiences, I do, but holidays with my family have often been boring for me. We usually do football, gym, dull excursions, and eat at restaurants, which is okay but expensive. Hotels and all-inclusive trips feel tedious, with queues, security checks, and a lot of effort for something I don’t enjoy. It feels like they want me to go but will not budge on things I actually like, such as hiring a car, going on a cruise, getting room service, or picking destinations. Maybe they would budge a bit, like going on a cruise excursion or a boat trip, but that would probably be boring too. I went on one in Greece once, and it was so boring. Often I would have to pay or lend money for things I do not even enjoy. Some of the best experiences I have had were simple things, like riding electric scooters, which can even be done locally. I genuinely want experiences that feel exciting, like a cruise, or maybe visiting countries like America one day, but I want to wait until I can properly enjoy them.

I do not want to sound boring. I do have interests, just different ones from what others enjoy. Sitting at home is not perfect, but it is better than forcing myself into something I will not enjoy. Being without a job is my biggest fear, but I am determined to get into work first so that when I do spend money, I can enjoy it on my own terms and do things that truly excite me. I also do not want to sound ungrateful. I know people are having proper issues, and I am just complaining about a family holiday. I know some people cannot go abroad, and if I could, I would probably give my place to someone who really wants to go. I just feel a bit behind in life with this, seeing people going abroad with their friends and partners while I have not had that yet and am still going with family. I often fail to grasp that it is part of my own journey.

sinead276

I know it's a challenging time, especially with the way the job market is at the moment, but you will get there i'm sure of it. your determination and commitment is clear to see, even from just the posts you make on here. so if you keep going that little bit day by day, things will eventually start to look up (which i know may seem miles away at the moment)

as for the holiday side of the post, i think it is perfectly reasonable to have your own boundaries/preferences on whether you want to go away on holiday or not. you are completely entitled to have the view that you'd rather wait until you were in a job to go away. if you'd rather spend the time at home focused on the job hunt instead of being away in a hotel, then that is perfectly okay and understandable. and like you said, you don't have to spend money on something that won't add happiness to your life.

it's clear you're doing everything you can to find the right job for you, and that is all anyone can ask for, so remember to be kind to yourself in the process and do things that do bring you that extra dose of happiness. we are all here for you, cheering you on