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dont read cos apparently im just an attention seeker (helplines words)
River
Community Connector Posts: 4,520 The Mix Elder
CPTSD - my body constantly hurts because im always tense and on edge, my mind always feels like its spinning 70mph and i hallucinate alot, my head has been so cloudy and echoey and like im stuck in a camera watching myself
Sometimes when the people most like you don't love you, it is a hurt that can cause the greatest pain, and this pain can lead you to hate everything.
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@River it's as if half the helplines are filled with the most devious bastards of the general population who are trained to give completely shit advice and comments. You're not the first person they've said this too, and they are truly utter pricks for saying it to somebody else. You've been through horrific amounts that no person should ever have to face. That you survived, is a sheer miracle, and shows just how strong of a person you are River.
CPTSD is a serious and grievous thing. It has severe impacts on people that are very worrying and it's normal to feel this way because of it. Some cases are so severe it's hard to even describe. That you not only survived, but reached out for help is a testament to your strength, and you should be proud of that. And the utter prick who said that when you reached out should be utterly ashamed.
I can relate to being in fight or flight mode constantly, haven't been diagnosed but likely will with CPTSD, and i can promise, you asking for help is not attention seeking, it's a bloody disgrace you weren't given it from day one. Please don't let these complete and utter pricks stop you from reaching out again, they aren't worth a damn thing, you are. You are entitled and deserve help. Don't stop fighting the pricks until you get it.
It was KellysHeroes
@River KellysZero's more like given there cooking up that bullshit for people reaching out. i've heard mixed good and bad from them, from other people on here who used them.
Then I said well you clearly agree with her so I’ll go and die instead and he said “I can’t comment on that I’m afraid”
@River utterly useless bastards they are
ive had a shit experience on there with anthony! they wasn’t supportive of me at all. is there anyway you can put in a complaint?
I used to have Caroline as my counsellor however she said she needed alcohol after a session with me then I get swapped to have a counsellor tell me I attention seeker 🤧
@River i know you promised your safe, and i haven't forgot that, but i'm gonna need a pinky promise please.
Counsellors can be utterly shit at times, and there's always a chance they get things wrong. I've had to ask for different counsellors before, and most places have procedures to change counsellors to reflect that fact, as they do get things wrong. That they haven't even considered that they were wrong is just angering. I remember being told by a gp once, because i've had this medical issue for so long, it doesn't need sorting. I felt anger, then just surrender for a while. It sucks to be put down like that by people who should be helping.
That they are saying this on a mental health helpline is just madness and stupidity. You are no attention seeker. You went through hell. And the issues you have because of it, are all valid, and all deserve help, to handle and overcome, and the fact that these donkeys just turned around and said that is just madness. It's bullshit, don't listen to them.
@River it's as though they are running a useless prick of the year award, and are all attempting to go for gold by the sounds of it.
On the plus side I did speak to a lovely calm worker
@River as i said... half of the helpline workers are devious bastards. Glad that you were able to find the good half. Kelly's heroes have moved away from there initial goal and have gotten sloppy with there support provided. You're not the first to complain about them and i imagine your not the last. They do still have good workers but it's no guarantee you'll get one, but always worth a try.
I'm lad you spoke to somebody nice. Are you able to get any further help from calm?
@River they are utterly useless. Samaritans I've heard the worst about. Nice for the first 15 minutes, then cold, sometimes mean, which i think you might have said before.
@River i know it's not a lot, but i'm here for you friend. It must feel like a civil war going on in your head, thought against thought. No matter what, i'm always here for you (assuming the mix don't nuke me into out of space in the morning 😂 😭 )
@River which is perfectly understandable to feel. I don't know how hard that struggle is, but i do know it is a battle for you and a half. I'm gonna beg and plead for you not to relapse, but i know it isn't as easy as that for you. Whatever happens, i'm here for you, i care about you, and i'm proud of you for putting up so much of a fight for so long with it, and i'm always here regardless. Please try and hold out just a little longer if you can.
@River NO not at all. That can give you Tetanus. Please don't do it.
@River oh thank god. Tetanus is unexpected and that's what gets people.
@River thank you so much. Please just give yourself a hug from me. I got a little panicked there. Tetanus is heavily associated with rust, and can be fatal, even just a small wound with it. Best case scenario, you lose a limb, worst case, your life. It's terrifying which is why It's one of the most important vaccinations you can get.