struggling worse than ever !!tw!!

struggling0_0

hi. i’m in a worse headspace than ever. i simply don’t want to be here anymore. i’m so so tired of life. everything just feels worse. sh urges are bad, ed thoughts are bad. i’m tired. so so tired. i feel like the only option is to not be here anymore. nobody cares about me anyways. i just want to lock myself away in a dark room alone forever.

*im safe. i have no plans. i have no intentions*

Sian321

Hi @struggling0_0 , thank you so much for making this post. It sounds like things have gotten to a point now where they're very overwhelming and life is totally exhausting you. I hear you saying you just don't want to be here anymore. You want everything to stop. And you're feeling so uncared for and isolated. We hear you.

Can I ask, when you say that the ED thoughts are getting bad, would you feel safe to share a little bit more about what this looks like for you?

In terms of those SH urges too, how else might you be able to express your feelings right now more safely? I wonder if there are any coping tools that have felt supportive in the past for you? I can imagine those urges might feel really all-consuming and again, that sounds really distressing for you right now. I can see how things are bubbling up and over and its so much to cope with.

Thank you for letting us know you're physically safe, though I recognise that doesn't take away from the severity of what you're dealing with and how serious these feelings are.

Can I ask, how are you practically staying safe right now? What is helping you to do so?

Making this post is such a positive step and we're here for you, as our SHOUT, our 24/7 1:1 crisis text service.,

struggling0_0

hi @Sian321 ed thoughts are telling me to stop eating, just the bare minimum to function through work. sh is the only way my brain can actually get a break from how i feel, physical pain in the body quietens the mental pain in the head. i will be safe, dw. just gonna sleep to avoid being awake. i did reach out to shout and they just closed the convo on me. yay. i give up reaching out tbh.

Redemption

struggling0_0 wrote: »

hi. i’m in a worse headspace than ever. i simply don’t want to be here anymore. i’m so so tired of life. everything just feels worse. sh urges are bad, ed thoughts are bad. i’m tired. so so tired. i feel like the only option is to not be here anymore. nobody cares about me anyways. i just want to lock myself away in a dark room alone forever.

*im safe. i have no plans. i have no intentions*

@struggling0_0 I'm so sorry to hear this, we are all here for you, not matter what, is there anything we can do to help? You aren't alone, we're here 24/7 on boards ❤️.