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Keeping going
Redemption
Posts: 3,440 Boards Guru
I’m trying to push forward and move ahead, but it’s not easy with the slow progress. I do believe I’ll get to where I’m aiming to be, and that belief keeps me going, but it’s not over yet, and the journey isn’t simple. There have been ups and downs along the way. In the summer, I got a new work coach who’s been helpful, just like my previous one. He’s given me solid advice, and my last coach even signed me up with an association that’s still supporting me today, which I’m grateful for. My current coach has also provided good advice and support. When I first got the new coach, he told me he had everything in hand, so I shouldn’t worry. But I couldn’t shake the worry that I might not find a job, and that worry hasn’t gone away. My program finishes in a few days, and I still don’t have anything lined up. The time pressure is really getting to me I’m trying to get something, but it’s just not happening, and it feels like others are finding jobs so much easier. I’ve seen people leave their jobs and land another one within days, while mine is taking much longer. It seems like others secure jobs with ease, or their journeys are just smoother, and it’s hard not to compare myself to them.
I’ve seen people from my year who are my age, and they’ve worked several jobs, built decent careers, have nice cars, and it feels like they’ve got everything figured out. I know I have my own path, and I’ve made improvements, but it’s hard not to compare. Sometimes, I just feel like I’m not good enough because I see not having a job as a failure to secure one. It makes it hard for me to recognize the progress I’ve made. When I think about it, I just see myself as still not having a proper job—like I didn’t have one a year ago or the year before, and that’s still the case. That’s one of the things that affects me. Honestly, when people mention my progress or say they’re proud of me, I often wonder, “What progress?” or think that whatever it is isn’t good enough. For instance, I’ve got a volunteering role, which wasn’t something I wanted to do months ago, but I felt like I needed to do it. Even though I know it will help, I still hesitate, and sometimes I even think about calling in sick or not showing up. It’s hard to push myself to go, but I know it’s important.
The same thing happens with my maths functional skills. I didn’t like it, and I skipped a couple of sessions, hoping it wouldn’t happen. But I passed the first stage, and I think I’m about to move on to the next. Even so, I still feel really embarrassed and self-conscious about it. I feel like I should have reached a higher level by now, and that makes me question my progress.
I’m just trying to take it one step at a time. I really want to do well in life, and the first step for me right now is to get a job. It’s been hard, but I’m hoping it happens soon. This is a big step for me, and it’s been a long process, and I’m still not done yet. I have a few options, and there’s some support available, but none of it is guaranteed. There have been times when I thought I had something lined up, but those options fell through, and nothing is certain. I’m going to keep trying, though. I know something will come, and I believe it should be soon. I try to stay positive, but I also need to be realistic about how long it’s taking and the setbacks I’ve faced.
I’ve seen people from my year who are my age, and they’ve worked several jobs, built decent careers, have nice cars, and it feels like they’ve got everything figured out. I know I have my own path, and I’ve made improvements, but it’s hard not to compare. Sometimes, I just feel like I’m not good enough because I see not having a job as a failure to secure one. It makes it hard for me to recognize the progress I’ve made. When I think about it, I just see myself as still not having a proper job—like I didn’t have one a year ago or the year before, and that’s still the case. That’s one of the things that affects me. Honestly, when people mention my progress or say they’re proud of me, I often wonder, “What progress?” or think that whatever it is isn’t good enough. For instance, I’ve got a volunteering role, which wasn’t something I wanted to do months ago, but I felt like I needed to do it. Even though I know it will help, I still hesitate, and sometimes I even think about calling in sick or not showing up. It’s hard to push myself to go, but I know it’s important.
The same thing happens with my maths functional skills. I didn’t like it, and I skipped a couple of sessions, hoping it wouldn’t happen. But I passed the first stage, and I think I’m about to move on to the next. Even so, I still feel really embarrassed and self-conscious about it. I feel like I should have reached a higher level by now, and that makes me question my progress.
I’m just trying to take it one step at a time. I really want to do well in life, and the first step for me right now is to get a job. It’s been hard, but I’m hoping it happens soon. This is a big step for me, and it’s been a long process, and I’m still not done yet. I have a few options, and there’s some support available, but none of it is guaranteed. There have been times when I thought I had something lined up, but those options fell through, and nothing is certain. I’m going to keep trying, though. I know something will come, and I believe it should be soon. I try to stay positive, but I also need to be realistic about how long it’s taking and the setbacks I’ve faced.
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Comments
I can really hear how resilient you've had to in the last couple of months- seeing with work coaches and volunteering really are steps forward. The "not good enough" feeling often clouds our perception of progress so I'm wondering if you could try to shift your focus to these accomplishments?
Anxiety is natural with deadlines and uncertainty. How would it feel to break down the job search into manageable tasks? The pressure you're feeling is valid, but remember recruitment takes a long time and you're actively working towards your goals, and which is what matters in your situation.
Keep putting one foot in front of the other, I know your motivation for good thngs will lead you to where you want to be
Hey @ella thank you so much for your reply and kind words, it really means a lot. It’s comforting to know I’m not alone in feeling this way, and I’ll definitely try to focus more on the positive steps I’ve taken, like working with coaches and volunteering. For job searching, breaking it down into smaller tasks sounds like a good idea I could start by updating my CV, then set aside time each week to apply to a few jobs and track my progress. Thanks again for the support, it’s motivating and helps me stay focused.