Can you gaslight yourself into feeling better?

bignosegirly0

I’m getting fucking desperate at this point and thinking that maybe being delulu is the answer.

Let’s say I’m feeling insecure about people hurting me, if I just keep telling myself “I’m happy and don’t care”, would it eventually work?

Or if I’m feeling suicidal, if I keep saying “I don’t want to kill my self.” Will it work?

I just want to be in control of how I feel

Faolan

This is actually a good question lol . I don’t really know the answer but I kinda like the idea of it working.

I know some people repeat positive affirmations , which is essentially the same thing . I just did a google there to see if they work and here’s the answer -

According to research, yes, positive affirmations can work, particularly when used consistently and when they align with your existing beliefs, as they can help to improve self-esteem, reduce stress, and potentially influence behavior by creating new neural pathways in the brain; however, their effectiveness can vary depending on individual factors like self-esteem levels and the specific affirmation used.
Key points about positive affirmations:
Neuroplasticity:
Repeating positive statements can potentially rewire the brain by strengthening neural pathways associated with positive thoughts and beliefs.
Self-esteem impact:
Studies suggest that affirmations can be particularly beneficial for people with high self-esteem, while those with low self-esteem may experience negative effects from using affirmations that contradict their self-perception.
Important factors:
To be effective, affirmations should be stated in the present tense, be specific to your goals, and be believable to you.

That said, I think there’s a fine line here between trying to heal and suppressing how you really feel. If you’re feeling insecure when people hurt you, those feelings are more than valid and it’s okay for you to talk about that rather than lying to yourself .

Maybe worth try the positive affirmation thing instead of dismissing your own feelings , there’s loads online, even some based around bullying in the workplace

For example

Instead of “ I’m happy and don’t care”

Try

“I am worthy of respect, I am valuable to my workplace and I am entitled to be here”

Or something like that anyway 😅

sinead276

i completely agree with the post above. it's also like the usual saying of 'fake it till you make it' and all that. i think that in some regard if we try and be positive and have that mindset, our mood can change. like i do believe positive affirmations can work sometimes. but like the reply above says, its a fine line between getting ourselves to believe in ourselves, and supressing our true feelings to make way for these 'fake' ones if that makes sense.

but i think when done right there is no harm in a little positive affirmation and telling yourself that things will get better and you can do it.

we are here for you as always

independent_

I came here to say exactly what the others have said. I think it's a key part of therapies like CBT too, they're based around the fact that how we think directly influences how we feel and behave.

For me though, it very much depends how far I am into that cycle of depression and negative thoughts. If I'm too far into that hole (which I have been many, many times) it will never work. The negativity in my brain just takes over. However if I'm finding myself slipping back into that place, sometimes I can recognise it and try to change that thought pattern, which when paired with a good routine has helped me in the past.