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BillieTheBotBillieTheBot Posts: 8,750 Bot
edited December 2024 in Health & Wellbeing
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Beep boop. I'm a bot.
Post edited by JustV on

Comments

  • Sian321Sian321 Community Manager Posts: 271 The Mix Regular
    Hey @shannonxg_ , thank you so much for this post. I'm just reading this now.

    Firstly, it's so valid that you hate this time of year. It can incredibly hard for so many people, and it's just so difficult when there are all these socially-reinforced messages about this being a time of 'cheer' and 'joy' when for so many people that's not the reality. Thank you for being honest and real about how the Holidays truly feel for you.

    It sounds like there are a quite a lot of changes coming up for you, with your counselling through The Mix ending on Friday, and your psychologist appointment on Wednesday. It makes so much sense that it feels daunting, and I hear you when you say you don't want to lose your counsellor and you miss Sarah <3 These people have meant a lot to you, and been safe spaces to talk. It can be so hard when that shifts.

    You mentioned that you're unsure whether to pretend with your psychologist or to tell them how bad you feel, and I totally see your dilemma! You said you feel really scared about what might happen if you are honest, is that right? And it makes sense that you're conflicted and unsure what would be best. Can I ask, speaking from the part of you that's wanting to pretend, whats that part of you feeling and needing? And then the bit of you that wants to open up fully, again, what are they hoping for? The decision is entirely yours, @shannonxg_ , and truly there's no right or wrong. You're allowed to navigate this however feels best and most possible right now. However, I suppose I want to say that you deserve all the support and help you're looking for. And maybe opening up about how bad things are could help someone get a fuller picture?

    I also just want to say I'm so sorry you had that experience on the Helpline, and that your feelings about your Granda were so dismissed. That doesn't feel right at all, and I was kind of wincing reading the part of your message where the person had told you, 'that's just life'. That sounds so bewildering to hear, because even though death is an aspect of life, that doesn't mean it can't feel heart-breaking, and unfair, and scary. Sometimes maybe we wish it wasn't a part of life at all because we never seem to get enough time with the people we love, and that's so, so valid. Would you like to share about your Granda here? I'm sorry to hear he's unwell. That sounds painful for you, and we're here to listen if you wish to talk more. You don't have to carry that alone.

    TW: Suicide...
    Thank you for letting us know what they said about your thoughts of suicide too. Again, that just feels so dismissive, and I'd like to assure you that thoughts of suicide without a plan are just as serious as any other form of suicidality. I myself have coped with suicidal feelings in the past, and I can honestly say it's the hardest thing I've ever been through. You're valid, and you deserved to be listened to. I can imagine it took a lot of energy to reach out in the first place, and you're working hard to keep safe.

    It sounds like you've had other positive expereinces with different Helpline staff at that particular organisation, is that right? Would they be somewhere you'd be open to trying again in the future? Or maybe you'd like us to share some possible alternatives?

    Sending hugs, @shannonxg_ <3
  • shannon_164shannon_164 Posts: 540 Incredible Poster
    edited December 2024
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  • TheNightmareTheNightmare Posts: 2,750 Boards Guru
    I'm really sorry you're feeling this way. It sounds like you're going through so much, and it’s tough when you're not getting the support you need. You deserve to be heard and understood, and it’s okay to feel how you feel. I think it’s important to open up about how you truly feel, and you don’t deserve to be dismissed. I know how tough being dismissed is, but all support is valid, and you do deserve support with it all. Reaching out for help is brave, even when you're scared. Take things one step at a time, and be kind to yourself. You matter, and you don’t have to go through this alone. We're all here for you.
  • shannon_164shannon_164 Posts: 540 Incredible Poster
    edited December 2024
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  • shannon_164shannon_164 Posts: 540 Incredible Poster
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  • Sian321Sian321 Community Manager Posts: 271 The Mix Regular
    @shannonxg_ , no rush whatsoever with your reply. Please take the time you need, and know there's no pressure to reply to each part.

    I'm so sorry to hear you've just had that experience with Papyrus again. That sounds extreamly frustrating, and more than that, hurtful. To be made to feel like you're an issue when you're proactively trying to support yourself and keep safe feels so bewildering. You deserved better, @shannonxg_ .

    I wonder how safe you're feeling this evening? May I ask what the rest of your night might look like?

    I can offer some alternative Helplines that work with similiar themes as Papyrus below:
    https://www.samaritans.org/how-we-can-help/contact-samaritan/
    https://www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team/crisis-messenger
    https://stayingsafe.net/ - super safety plan template
    https://calmharm.stem4.org.uk/
    https://nopanic.org.uk/the-no-panic-helpline/

    Keep us posted, @shannonxg_ . We're here for you, and you deserve to not have to cope with these feelings on your own.
  • Orchid059Orchid059 Moderator Posts: 342 The Mix Regular
    Hi @shannonxg_ as echoed by @Sian321 and @TheNightmare you're feelings are valid and you deserve to be recognised and not dismissed, so I am so sorry that you have had such a negative experience. Don't let this bad experience put you off reaching out for support going forward. May I ask if it is just papyrus you have used or have you tried other crisis services?

    I'll attach a few options below just in case
    Crisis Messenger (24/7) I text THEMIX to 85258
    Samartians (24/7) I call 116 123 | email jo@samaritans.org
    Supportline (hours vary) I call 01708 765 200
    Childline call 0800 11 11

    Even though it feels like you're not being taken seriously by crisis lines, just know that we see and here you. And you don't have to go through this alone as we are here every step of the way <3
  • shannon_164shannon_164 Posts: 540 Incredible Poster
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  • TheNightmareTheNightmare Posts: 2,750 Boards Guru
    Im here if you need to pm for someone to talk to
  • shannon_164shannon_164 Posts: 540 Incredible Poster
    edited December 2024
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  • TheNightmareTheNightmare Posts: 2,750 Boards Guru
    shannonxg_ wrote: »
    @TheNightmare thank you so much, i appreciate that a lot - same for you always🤍

    No problem and thanks to you too
  • shannon_164shannon_164 Posts: 540 Incredible Poster
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  • eylaheylah Posts: 5,828 Part of The Furniture
    hey @shannonxg_ im so sry noone has responded to you but i have only just seen this im so sry. its terrible how the helplines have treated you its awful bc you are deserving of having someone to talk to and listen to you and theyre treating you like utter shit. im rly sry to hear abt how samaritans spoke to you this morning im rly sry 💔 how are you now? im hoping your doing ok always here for you 🩷
    keep your face always toward the sunshine and shadows will fall behind you. 🤍

    pfp made by @Chloe234 ❤️
  • shannon_164shannon_164 Posts: 540 Incredible Poster
    edited December 2024
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  • eylaheylah Posts: 5,828 Part of The Furniture
    edited December 2024
    @shannonxg_ im rly confused abt papryus aren’t their helping there to help ppl keep safe from suicide and use the safety plan? when I called i was like im not ready etc but did they say why they was refusing? for the other helplines i don’t know why they wont support you tbh samaritans are awful ( never had gd experiences with them!) shout theyre ok ( depending who i get) papryus idk last time i spoke to them they called police so i hate them also 😅 but its shocking bc your deserving of support no matter how many times you contact them you deserve support. im so sry you feel like a inconvenience but your not! you are trying your best to keep safe from your thoughts and your doing the right thing. its the helplines that are failing you massively and im rly sry to hear this. i see how resilient your being by carrying on even when things are rly shitty and you are being let down your doing rly well by continuing to fight even when you feel like giving up. is there any helpline that’s helped before? have you ever heard of hub of hope? its a helpline finder ( and location help finder) to find help on your local area i was recommended it by someone idk who though but it rly is so helpful bc you can put in what your needing help with and it gives helplines for it aka ( sh ) ( ptsd ) ( anxiety ) etc etc. hugs 🫂 im here for you your not being a inconvenience to anyone! everyone at the mix rly appreciate your kindness and support to everyone and you deserve that support back keep going Shanon bc your time is not up you have so much to offer to this world your a beautiful human being and you are so precious to me and everyone at the mix 🩷 keep going xx im so incredibly proud of you xx
    keep your face always toward the sunshine and shadows will fall behind you. 🤍

    pfp made by @Chloe234 ❤️
  • shannon_164shannon_164 Posts: 540 Incredible Poster
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  • shannon_164shannon_164 Posts: 540 Incredible Poster
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  • shannon_164shannon_164 Posts: 540 Incredible Poster
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  • shannon_164shannon_164 Posts: 540 Incredible Poster
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  • TheNightmareTheNightmare Posts: 2,750 Boards Guru
    We are all listening and here to help
  • shannon_164shannon_164 Posts: 540 Incredible Poster
    edited December 2024
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  • shannon_164shannon_164 Posts: 540 Incredible Poster
    edited December 2024
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  • shannon_164shannon_164 Posts: 540 Incredible Poster
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  • Orchid059Orchid059 Moderator Posts: 342 The Mix Regular
    shannonxg_ wrote: »
    another update i do apologise!!

    the appointment with the psychologist went really well compared to what i expected so i am relieved🙂

    So glad to hear this @shannonxg_ you deserve to the best support. Keep us updated with how it is going <3
  • eylaheylah Posts: 5,828 Part of The Furniture
    shannonxg_ wrote: »
    another update i do apologise!!

    the appointment with the psychologist went really well compared to what i expected so i am relieved🙂

    yay! how are things now? so glad things went well with your psychologist! you deserve the best in this world and im so glad ppl are starting to see you deserve and need support!!! ❤️ keep going shannon ❤️
    keep your face always toward the sunshine and shadows will fall behind you. 🤍

    pfp made by @Chloe234 ❤️
  • shannon_164shannon_164 Posts: 540 Incredible Poster
    edited December 2024
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