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Question about self harm
Rose113
Community Champion Posts: 2,519 Boards Guru
is it possible that someone self harms because they look up to there older sibling? It got me thinking about something that my younger sister parents said
Want to hurt me… go ahead
Wish to bully me…I’m used to it
Want to talk crap about me…go on then
Want to make me cry…feel free
Wish to bully me…I’m used to it
Want to talk crap about me…go on then
Want to make me cry…feel free
2
Comments
I suppose there will be many reasons why a person self-harms, and these reasons could differ for everyone. And it can be hard to say what kind of influence siblings might have on each other and their mental health or ways of coping. Do you feel that maybe you look up to an older sibling, or that one of your siblings looks up to you? (My appologies if I'm not up to speed yet with the dynamics between you and your siblings, and thank you for helping me get to know you here on Boards ).
I'm here for you, and around on Boards today so would love to reply to you more if you wanted to share. I'm mindful self-harm can be a really emotionally loaded expereince, esspecially when there are feelings attached to it around our siblings or influence on family members. So I'm sending you a hug, @Rose113
You might find the following places helpful:
https://www.nshn.co.uk/
https://www.recoveryourlife.com/
https://www.selfharm.co.uk/
https://harmless.org.uk/
You can also check out our articles on our website: https://www.themix.org.uk/search/self+harm
Wish to bully me…I’m used to it
Want to talk crap about me…go on then
Want to make me cry…feel free
That's a really heavy thing to be told, and I feel frustrated on your behalf that you have recieved blame for this. That's really upsetting, esspecially when you yourself have been struggling and trying to cope as best you can. You are allowed to have your own struggles.
Because humans are social creatures, it's true that we might influence those around us (particularly within our families). But we can't necessarily know or control what that influence might be. And while it sounds as though your younger sister might be coping with mental health struggles, these will be unique and seperate from your own.
It sounds as though your younger sister's parents have drawn conclusions and made assumptions here which may not necessarily be true, and I hear it's causing you a lot of worry.
How did their suggestion make you feel, @Rose113 ? And how are you taking care of yourself at this time?
That's a lot to hold alongside your own struggles too. I'm sending you the biggest hug
Wish to bully me…I’m used to it
Want to talk crap about me…go on then
Want to make me cry…feel free
I wonder whether you've been able to speak with anyone else about the guilt your feeling?
You are allowed to struggle, and it's okay not to be okay. Even if those struggles touch the lives of those around us. That's the beauty and the challenge of us being so interconnected as humans.
You're doing your very best to cope, and are so deserving of understanding and kindness here.
Thank you for opening up about this, and please know this is a judgement-free zone
No I’ve kinda always kept it too myself tbh
Wish to bully me…I’m used to it
Want to talk crap about me…go on then
Want to make me cry…feel free
Feeling guilty or ashamed can be such an all-consuming feeling sometimes, and I can relate to how guilt can really gnaw away at you .
How does it feel opening up about this here on Boards? It sounds like you've had to keep a lot of this bottled up inside, so I really just want to celebrate the fact that you're opening up and allowing us to hold this with you.
You really do deserve so much kindness, @Rose113