Birthday party and anxiety

Lucy_21

It's my brother's party on the 14th as one birthday is 13th and the other the 15th. It seems like we are going to a soft play place and I'm anxious about it being too loud and too many people. I usually use my bible but it means too much to me to take as it could get lost or damaged with kids drinks and stuff. Any suggestions on how to cope but still at least look like I'm paying attention to my brother's and family

Katie

Hey @Lucy_21 firstly happy birthday to both your brothers! Crazy their birthdays are so close!

I hear you when you say you're anxious about it being too loud and too many people, especially as it's a party. Do you know anyone who is going other than your family, and is there an option for you to maybe bring a friend? You might find this brings you some comfort, familiarity and something to focus on.

Lucy_21 wrote: »

I usually use my bible but it means too much to me to take as it could get lost or damaged with kids drinks and stuff. Any suggestions on how to cope but still at least look like I'm paying attention to my brother's and family

It sounds like your bible often helps ground you in situations like this. It's really great you have this tool and something to focus on, but I completely understand that it might be a bit risky to take it with you in case it gets damaged. Kids can be very clumsy! Is there anything else that helps ground you? I'm thinking maybe some sensory/fidget toys, your phone, listening to music etc. Being able to take short breaks might help as well so that you can distance yourself and have a quiet few minutes. I hear you when you say you want to look like you're paying attention to your brothers and family, so maybe you could step away for a little bit every now and again and go on your phone or listen to music What do you think?

It might also be an option to look at the bible on your phone, or do you have access to print out some of the verses? This would prevent your actual bible from being damaged, whilst still bringing you some comfort.

How do these sound Lucy?

Sunshine12

@Lucy_21 hey! it sounds like the party at the soft play would feel very overwhelming for u, which is perfectly understandable considering the noise, but i also understand that of course u wouldn't want to miss ur brother's party. I was thinking maybe u could bring some headphones if u have some and listen to some calming music/ur fav music to try and focus less on the environment ur in, even better if they're noise cancelling headphones, that way u could still look like ur paying attention (if u could hide them behind ur hair), i've also seen that u can get a bible app on ur phone which u could read from, if it helps u could also go to the toilets there and take a few moments to have a break from the party and to help u calm down, i also agree with @Katie fidget toys are a great idea cause they rrly help me in stressful environments and u can just put them in ur pocket so no one needs to see them. I hope the party goes well for u

Lucy_21

Thank you so much @Katie and @Sunshine12 for context my nana gave me the bible the night she died unexpectedly hence the sentiment and why it helps so don't think an online version will help as it's the act of actually holding it that helps but thank you for the headphones thing I will charge them all and my phone tonight for music and something to fidget with is something I've never tired but my brother's are on spectrum so use them so I could take a small one form the box to try in my pocket. Thank you for the birthday wishes Katie that's really sweet and I'll let you know how it went tomorrow. Thank you💖