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My journey in reconnecting with my real family
Rose113
Community Champion Posts: 2,380 Boards Champion
TW// mentions of; abuse, alcohol, social services
Short story
2006
I was born in 2006 and my birth parent struggled to look after us and when they got stressed they would drink and drink resulting in social services getting involved at this time I was the 5th child in the family. Between 2006-2009 we had been put into foster care 2 times.
2009
In 2009 we got removed fully this was after 2 other children had been born, the 2 newborns were put into care together and then me and one of my brothers who is a year older than me were placed into a foster home together and my 3 other brothers were placed together.
2009- start of 2011
At this time our parents had lost full custody of us despite the 3rd time we went into care they had requested the help from social services. Whilst me and my brother were in a foster home together we both were abused and we witnessed/heared each other being harmed. During this time as well the 8th child was born and she was adopted and removed at birth
Middle of 2011
At this time I got adopted and so my brother was left at that home in which then social services decided to move him to where my other 3 brothers were living but after I left he never fully recovered and it hit him hard
This was the last time I’d ever saw them all…
2021
At this time I was 15 and was thinking more and more about making contact again but the parent I was adopted to made it clear that I’d be alone if I did that and she wouldn’t want shit to do with it and even said that if she wasn’t good enough for me to the point I wanted to speak to my real parents then for all she cared I could go and live with them because she wouldn’t care
3rd of November 2024
Prior to this I had been thinking about taking that step into making the contact and it was getting stronger and stronger on my mind so the 3rd of November came and I was speaking to a community member about it and they were keen on helping me. We started with just one brother but he hadn’t answered so we tried another brother and he answered. The member that reached out to him helped me every step of the way with doing it and set up a group because I was too scared and then after I’d been talking to my brothers for awhile they told me that they’d told our mum and at this point I wasn’t going to make contact with her but I ended up doing so and honestly it’s been the best thing I could of ever done.
Conclusion
Since doing this I’ve become to feel like I belong in this world and that I’m actually loved and cared about. Mum has told me more I love yous than my current parent ever has. I’ve become to know what I was like when I was little, and see more pictures of what I looked like.
What I was like as a child
I was a feral child
my Favourite word was shit and when I was feeling extra cheeky I’d say big shit apparently I had an devious laugh
Short story
2006
I was born in 2006 and my birth parent struggled to look after us and when they got stressed they would drink and drink resulting in social services getting involved at this time I was the 5th child in the family. Between 2006-2009 we had been put into foster care 2 times.
2009
In 2009 we got removed fully this was after 2 other children had been born, the 2 newborns were put into care together and then me and one of my brothers who is a year older than me were placed into a foster home together and my 3 other brothers were placed together.
2009- start of 2011
At this time our parents had lost full custody of us despite the 3rd time we went into care they had requested the help from social services. Whilst me and my brother were in a foster home together we both were abused and we witnessed/heared each other being harmed. During this time as well the 8th child was born and she was adopted and removed at birth
Middle of 2011
At this time I got adopted and so my brother was left at that home in which then social services decided to move him to where my other 3 brothers were living but after I left he never fully recovered and it hit him hard
This was the last time I’d ever saw them all…
2021
At this time I was 15 and was thinking more and more about making contact again but the parent I was adopted to made it clear that I’d be alone if I did that and she wouldn’t want shit to do with it and even said that if she wasn’t good enough for me to the point I wanted to speak to my real parents then for all she cared I could go and live with them because she wouldn’t care
3rd of November 2024
Prior to this I had been thinking about taking that step into making the contact and it was getting stronger and stronger on my mind so the 3rd of November came and I was speaking to a community member about it and they were keen on helping me. We started with just one brother but he hadn’t answered so we tried another brother and he answered. The member that reached out to him helped me every step of the way with doing it and set up a group because I was too scared and then after I’d been talking to my brothers for awhile they told me that they’d told our mum and at this point I wasn’t going to make contact with her but I ended up doing so and honestly it’s been the best thing I could of ever done.
Conclusion
Since doing this I’ve become to feel like I belong in this world and that I’m actually loved and cared about. Mum has told me more I love yous than my current parent ever has. I’ve become to know what I was like when I was little, and see more pictures of what I looked like.
What I was like as a child
I was a feral child
my Favourite word was shit and when I was feeling extra cheeky I’d say big shit apparently I had an devious laugh Profile picture made by @Chloe234
Want to hurt me… go ahead
Wish to bully me…I’m used to it
Want to talk crap about me…go on then
Want to make me cry…feel free
Want to hurt me… go ahead
Wish to bully me…I’m used to it
Want to talk crap about me…go on then
Want to make me cry…feel free
1
Comments
It's so nice to hear that despite how scared you were that you pushed yourself and reconnected with your family and it's great to hear that you got support with reaching out to them. We're all super proud of you its so lovely that you're sharing your journey with us here