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Rose113
Community Champion Posts: 2,519 Boards Guru
[deleted]
Want to hurt me… go ahead
Wish to bully me…I’m used to it
Want to talk crap about me…go on then
Want to make me cry…feel free
Wish to bully me…I’m used to it
Want to talk crap about me…go on then
Want to make me cry…feel free
Post edited by JustV on
2
This discussion has been closed.
Comments
but remember to take care of yourself too and that you're mental health also matters in this situation. we are all here to support you too however we can. keep being amazing
sending hugs
I also want to mention that you may not be helping your friend in the long term if your interactions are unboundaried in that way. It may sound cold, but allowing someone to have some time or space without you there - even if they struggle - is an important part of them developing ways to manage on their own when they need to. If we never let them be alone, we rob them of their ability to build those skills for themselves. People tend to be more capable than we give them credit for and your friend will probably be okay without you for a time.
And if your friend is actively suicidal and at risk of harm or dying, the situation has already gone beyond what is safe for both of you. At that point, it's really important to involve other people to spread the responsibility for that person.
I would also encourage you to try and let go of the notion that you should (and that you can) control what other people do. You can be there for them, but when you're at the point of saying "I need to stop this person doing x" things can start to become a bit toxic.
Not to downplay your intentions @Rose113 - it's obvious you really wanna help this person, in my experience this is just a trap I've seen lots of folks fall into
Wish to bully me…I’m used to it
Want to talk crap about me…go on then
Want to make me cry…feel free
Wish to bully me…I’m used to it
Want to talk crap about me…go on then
Want to make me cry…feel free
that is so rude. they was helping them not bring them down.. thats not nice to say abt just v especially when they was only trying to help rose.
Wish to bully me…I’m used to it
Want to talk crap about me…go on then
Want to make me cry…feel free
I won't say too much on this because Rose has deleted their original post. I hear that you're trying to support them, but I'm not trying to suggest that Rose is hurting anyone (I don't think they are). There are some signs here of an unhealthy dynamic between Rose and their friend that I wanted to highlight. Supporting other community members isn't just about affirming and encouraging them - sometimes it also means challenging what they say if we think it might be helpful.
@Rose113, I am sorry if my response upset you - that wasn't my intention. I'm approaching this with experience of being that 'therapist friend', so it honestly comes without judgement and with a lot of empathy for the position you're in. That could probably have been clearer in my post.