I’ve just come out to my parents

Former Member

I don’t know how this is going to come out, but I’ve just come out to my parents.
And this is what I need to tell you
Hey everyone, I just wanted to let you know something, as some of you may be aware I’ve been struggling to come out to my mum recently and my dad, I’ve just plucked up the courage to come out to my mum by telling her that I fancied this guy, but it was a nice conversation opener, we discussed it and she is now crying about it, I don’t quite know how to take it, I now kind of feel likeB it’s the wrong decision. Is this a normal feeling to have?

ella

@malachit Thank you so much for sharing this with the community. It takes a lot of courage to come out to your parents, and it's really normal to feel unsure after, even if it started as a good conversation. You did great by being so brave!

I can relate a bit from some lived experience - I'm part of the LGBTQ+ community too, and when I came out to my mum, she cried as well. It doesn't necessarily mean it's a bad thing, but it can be confusing and make you feel really vulnerable. It may be a case of calmly asking her why she reacted in the way she did- there might be something she feeling which she's not fully communicating with you. This doesn't mean you have done anything wrong, humans (especially family members) have a funny way of communicating their needs and reactions

Remember, this is about your journey and your feelings. And it's okay if you need some time and space to process everything.

Do you have any other friends or family members in the queer community that you can relate to or talk to for support?

Sending hugs your way- you did the right thing even if it feels scary right now!

Former Member

i agree with ella - it depends on why your mother was crying . to a parent it can feel as if they have fallen short because the child didnt trust them sooner . other times it can be for selfish or ill-informed reasons, other times joy or relief ! regardless, you should never be made to feel like coming out is the wrong decision, and youre very brave for doing so . everyone deserves acceptance, anyone who makes you feel otherwise is not worth feeling bad about .
sometimes it can take loved ones a while to come around, for whatever reason, and that kind of growth is a wonderful thing . give it time, but always know there will be a place for you to be accepted as you are, related or not . i hope youre doing well and that things are going smoothly .
take care !