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Feeling like an outsider and struggling with rumination

Past UserPast User Posts: 0 Just got here
edited May 2024 in Health & Wellbeing
The user and all related content has been deleted.
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  • Matthew_04Matthew_04 Discussion Boards Moderator Posts: 390 Listening Ear
    Hey @Creativeboy23
    Ruminating on situations that made you feel criticized and isolated must be quite upsetting and exhausting :'(
    I'm really glad you were able to post about it here though, you've always got this community to lean on and chat to about anything.
    I can totally understand it's quite tricky striking a balance between dating and doing what's right for yourself, i think it's important to try not put too much pressure on yourself in these situations too <3
    Sending lots of hugs!!
  • Past UserPast User Posts: 0 Just got here
    edited May 2024
    The user and all related content has been deleted.
    Post edited by Past User on
  • Matthew_04Matthew_04 Discussion Boards Moderator Posts: 390 Listening Ear
    Hey @Creativeboy23
    From your post, it sounded like when you didn't check your letterbox you immediately felt guilty about it. But its okay to forget things sometimes. It sounded like you were beating yourself up about it a little instead of treating yourself with compassion <3
    How are you doing now?
  • Past UserPast User Posts: 0 Just got here
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  • Matthew_04Matthew_04 Discussion Boards Moderator Posts: 390 Listening Ear
    Hi @Creativeboy23
    Creativeboy23 wrote: »

    I think it is because I was told to check my letterbox, which will make me think harder, and feel guilty when I forget to do it. I used to get punished at home when I forgot things.
    That makes sense, i understand why you'd feel guilty for forgetting things.
    Creativeboy23 wrote: »


    I have been feeling I should not acknowledge my feelings when I am being unkind to myself because we are meant to show self-compassion.

    I have been doubtful about my feelings due to experiences of invalidation.

    I'm sorry if i wasn't clear previously <3
    I was not criticising you for feeling guilty but I can understand why you felt that way.
    What I meant by compassion was to acknowledge how you are feeling and instead of ruminating about similar experiences, to accept the situation for what it is and try move on or improve for next time. As you mentioned ruminating I thought this might help but if I've misread the situation and that isn't helpful to you, that's okay.

    You're always welcome to share how you feel here without judgement, apologies again if my response wasn't helpful.
    Let me know how you get on <3

  • Past UserPast User Posts: 0 Just got here
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