Not sure whether I should trust my friend

Verinelin

I recently told a friend something that scares me (I'm oversimplifying but basically that I'm being watched all the time and can't trust most people because they're in on it). They said that I should tell the doctor I see but I'm really not sure - the doctor is one of the people I dont think I can trust - and now I'm really worried about my friend's intentions which is frustrating because they have always been there for me. My friend is right that this really stresses me out and I've been struggling to leave my room (which i keep dark in case of cameras) for more than a few minutes at a time without getting super anxious or to think about literally anything else.

ella

Hi @Verinelin It sounds incredibly difficult to feel like you're constantly being watched and like you can't trust the people around you, including someone you previously felt close with. It's completely understandable that this would be causing you stress and anxiety, which might be leading to you not wanting to leave your room or not being able to focus on anything else.

A huge well done for sharing this fear with your friend, even though it resulted in a response that may not have felt helpful right now. It shows how much you value their support and would like to seek help from people around you. You have also been incredibly brave sharing with us here on the community💖

Even though the doctor might seem scary right now, they're actually trained to help people with these kinds of feelings. It might feel like a huge risk, but talking to someone who understands what you're going through could be a big step towards feeling safe. Also worth adding here- Is there maybe specific doctor you feel more comfortable seeing? You can usually request this when you book an appointment at the GP

On the other hand, if you're really not comfortable with the doctor, that's okay too. Maybe there's another option, like a therapist or counsellor who specialises in anxiety? The most important thing is to find someone you feel safe talking to, even if it takes a little time.

The Mix also offers free counselling, which might be worth exploring as another safe and judgement-free space to share your experiences- we are happy to answer any questions about this. I will add the link in here for you.

In the meantime, we are here for you. You can always reach out and talk about what's going on, even if it's just to vent

Please let us know how you're getting on!

- @ella and the team

Verinelin

Thank you @ella. My appointment is tomorrow (it's an appointment date I've had for a while for general mental health stuff with a psychiatrist) but I'm now really nervous about it and spent the whole day freaking out a bit. I don't mind the psychiatrist I'm seeing but she can be a little bit dismissive. I think I will tell her because my friend wouldn't suggest it if they weren't concerned, at least that's what I'm trying to tell myself. Also the anxiety is almost unbearable, I haven't been coping with it very well at all and am not sure i can continue coping with it without support, and if the doctor can help with that then maybe it's worth telling her the full truth instead of just buts of it.

ella

Hey @Verinelin, it's completely normal and okay to feel nervous before a mental health appointment, especially when you've had time to build it up in your head. It's great that you're already scheduled to see a psychiatrist, and even better that you're considering opening up about your anxiety and telling them the full extent of what is going on for you.

I hear you about your concerns about the psychiatrist's dismissive approach. Maybe you could consider writing down your key points beforehand. This can ensure you get everything out you need to say and maybe even make you feel more confident going into the appointment. If you're still feeling unsure, you could jot down some specific examples of how your anxiety has impacted your daily life. Highlighting concrete situations can help paint a clearer picture for the doctor. Ultimately, the decision of how much to share is entirely yours.

You're right, it sounds like your friend wouldn't have suggested this if they didn't genuinely care and believe seeking help is the right move for you. You deserve to feel supported, and hopefully, this appointment can be a turning point in managing your anxiety.

Just remember, you're not alone in this, and seeking help is a brilliant first step. Sending hugs and all the best for your appointment tomorrow! Please let us know how you get on💖

A gentle reminder that you can always contact our Crisis Messenger by texting THEMIX to 85258 which is open 24/7 if you need urgent support.