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Im trying, I really am but I dont know how to do this anymore, its getting too hard and I'm finding it so hard to cope. I want to be okay or even a tiny. I dont want to be like this anymore its too painful, im so drained and I've hit rock bottom completely. How am I ment to get through everything when I'm loosing everyone. So many people have decided there sick of me. Everyone's done dealing with me and my mental health, dont blame them but it hurts. Why cant I have one person at least stick by me. No one even bothers to stay in my life for more than a year and it hurts. All I'm doing is tryna survive each day as it comes yet no one can even see that. Im just a pathetic disappointment. Trying to just cancel my feelings since there stupud anyway and atleast if I don't have any feelings then people don't have to deal with me. So many people make me feel like having feelings is a crime. I cant vent to anyone or nothing without fear of being abandoned. I just wish someone would stick by me or if no one will then cant people say that and warn me in advance. My mental health is slowly killing me but whatever I'm done trying to get help, im done being a burden and an issue to others. No one would even realise if I just went mute, I'd be forgotten in an instance. Everyday scares me because of the thoughts of not being able to get through each day and night without harming. I'm trying so so hard to cope in silence but nothing feels good enough, I won't ever be good enough which makes me wonder why am even carrying on...no one makes my life easier, I find that I just want to run away from everyone. I'm tired of talking to people, im tired of people getting annoyed at me. Im trying so bloody hard. My mental state is scaring me. Sorry
Slowly healing n finding the real me 🥲