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what's the point anymore

spacedogspacedog Posts: 1,149 Wise Owl
in Health & Wellbeing
whats the point in trying if i just get thrown around the mental health system who don't give one fuck, they just look at me as if im just some disposable kid whom it would be easier if he were just dead. i dont know what the point is anymore, i dont see how this can get any better. any time i got to a and e, phone up my psychiatrist or even talk to my parents they all just think im overreacting and ill somehow get magically better - 6 fucking months ive had to put up with this and i dont see how it can improve any time soon. i know ill just be told the same stuff im always told - you can wait a wee bit longer, your problems are completley valid, things will get better but its the same stuff ive always been told. the worst 6 months of my life and i get treated like shit, pushed around as if its my fault and left with nothing and im just supposed to put up with it, i dont know how much more i can take, or how much longer i want to deal with i dont know anymore

Comments

  • spacedogspacedog Posts: 1,149 Wise Owl
    i'm fine
  • spacedogspacedog Posts: 1,149 Wise Owl
    i dont want to die
  • support_squad23support_squad23 Posts: 113 The Mix Convert
    Hi @IainJammyboy

    It seems like things are becoming really impossibly difficult for you at the moment. When the pain and struggle does not ease, and your hear the same comments from your support network time and time again, this can become incredibly frustrating. It's understandable that you so desperately wish for things to change now. You are worthy and deserving of reaching a point where this is more manageable. The fact that this transition might not be instant can be so tough to accept. A moment of reprieve can feel out of reach when you feel this low. Pushing through can become exhausting and draining.

    May I ask what has been particularly difficult about this day or week? I'm here to listen, if you'd like to share.

    Take care
  • spacedogspacedog Posts: 1,149 Wise Owl
    @support_squad23 I just had a complete breakdown last night and is still going through to today where I just keep on thinking about my last suicide attempt and how I really want to go through with it again. Nothings happened for the past 2 months for me but it's like my own brain is torturing me, I don't understand but with it getting so much worse I can't take it anymore
  • support_squad23support_squad23 Posts: 113 The Mix Convert
    Hi @IainJammyboy

    Thank you for sharing this with me, I appreciate your openness and willingness to be vulnerable here. It seems like it's all getting to be too much at the moment, I can see how difficult and painful these times are for you right now. Suicidal thoughts can feel inescapable, it looks like they feel relentless currently. You deserve to have support and care. May I ask whether you've been able to share how you've been feeling this week with a trusted adult or medical professional? You shouldn't have to face this alone.

    I am going to attach some services which provide specialist support for suicidal ideation. It might be a good next step to go through these, if they feel accessible to you:
    https://www.thecalmzone.net/
    https://www.spuk.org.uk/national-suicide-prevention-helpline-uk/
    https://www.papyrus-uk.org/

    Let us know how you get on.
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