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Problems with a teacher

Chloe234Chloe234 Community Champion Posts: 3,577 Community Veteran
edited March 27 in Work & Study
I don't know if this is the right place for this but it's school related.

My English teacher basically told me I have no hope with my gcses, she's Marking a test that we did too and it's one where she stood infront of the class and said "oh if you didn't get that then you've basically got no hope" and proceeded to go to my friend who was right next to me and go " did you hear that a couple people wrote less than half a page" in such a disgusted voice (I'm 99% sure she knew I was one of them/she had already looked) so that upset me a bit.

I'm also not doing good on any of my tests because there's so much on my mind. Had a breakdown last week friday bc the english teacher saying what she did just pulled my last string. I can't keep up.

On Thursday we had another test in her class and we were getting handed lined paper and she gave everyone multiple however then she gave me only one and said infront of the whole class "you'll obviously only need one" what upset me. She then also wouldn't stop staring at me while we were doing the test so I couldn't concentrate and ended up going to one of my fav teachers crying because of her and I was all stressed out etc

So yesterday my friend had decided she had had enough and was going to confront her at break. (which already screams a warning sign) so my friend disappeared at break bit we thought she was joking so didn't stop her and I just went to lesson what was with the English teacher what went fine but as I was walking out to go to 4th lesson she asked me to come with her because she was going to have a little chat to me. So I was thinking "okay..."

So she took me to pastoral and my friend was in there crying so I just thought "oh god, she hasnt" but then Mrs told me that my friend had come up to her at break saying that she had done things and stuff and asked me what it was about.

So I said about the things she did (at this point I was in tears) but she was just denying it all saying "no no no that was just a joke and when I said about the half a page thing I just meant that some people needs to learn to write quicker, I wouldn't aim it at you" and she was basically making it look like i was lying and she was all innocent altho she couldve just said sorry

So I was just sat there crying still with my friend next to me when i just burst and said how i feel like im doing way worse than everyone else in lessons, im struggling to keep up bc ive just got so much going on in my home life and im so stressed and they asked a few more questions ect but then the pastoral lady said that she thinks that i need some support but i said i didnt know bc i didnt want dad to know that im struggling and she asked that if i meant by struggling, did i mean mentally and i just nodded so she then asked if I talk to anyone in school what I told the truth and said no so then the she said that it sounds like I've got no confidence in myself and a very low self esteem, she said that I've been holding it in for so long and I need someone to talk to about it because its not good for me to keep it in, she said that im quite a quiet and sensitive person who seems to hide alot and she asked if she could get me some help asap and I just nodded because I've just reached it with my mental health.

My English teacher then gave me some revision books and sent me back to class but now I feel so drained and low

It doesn't feel right getting support, I'm so used to keeping it in and if I say 1 thing wrong they'll tell my dad and I really don't want that. Idk I'm scared to get help especially from school and I can't get my English teacher out of my head
🦆💜🦆💜🦆
Post edited by JustV on

Comments

  • This content has been removed.
  • Chloe234Chloe234 Community Champion Posts: 3,577 Community Veteran
    edited September 18
    Past User wrote: »
    @Chloe234 I would just like to say, im so proud of you for taking that step and reaching out for help, you've done so well.

    I think your English teacher will be nicer towards you now if she was in the room and if she wasn't she will have most likely got an email from the pastoral lady. <3

    Thankyou morgy❤️
    Post edited by TheMix on
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  • Former MemberFormer Member Moderator Posts: 197 Trailblazer
    edited January 2023
    Hey @Chloe234,
    It sounds like a lot has been going on in your life lately and I can personally empathise a lot with the feeling of helplessness that comes with being mistreated by a teacher. It also seems to me that all of it unfolding so fast (your friend talking to the teacher, you feeling pressured to talk about your struggles, etc.) could be very overwhelming. No one has the right to make you feel less than or humiliated. I also want to acknowledge how frustrating it must have been not to have been taken seriously when trying to address the teacher's behaviour. Would it be possible for you to talk to your school's dean about it?

    You describe your mental health as deteriorating and reaching a sort of limit and I'm very sorry you've been struggling with it. You've also mentioned feeling like communicating your struggles and seeking support might be wrong and you've talked about keeping everything to yourself, can you tell me a bit more about your struggles when it comes to asking and receiving support? Do you feel like there could be a way for you to receive the support you need that would make you feel more at ease?
    I understand that you may not feel ready, or want to, disclose how you're feeling to your parents, or father in particular. You shouldn't feel pressured to talk to anyone and you deserve to feel control over the circumstances in which you decide to open up and seek help. While talking to someone at school may be indeed helpful, it seems to me you might be afraid that your father may find out. If you choose not to go through your school, here are some other resources you might want to look into:

    -Kooth: One option is an organisation called Kooth, which provides emotional support and online counselling to young people aged 10-19. They also offer a range of articles and resources, discussion boards and a daily journal space on their website. Their webchat service is open Monday-Friday 12pm-10pm and Saturday and Sunday 6pm-10pm. You can find out more here: https://kooth.com/

    Youth Access: There is an organisation called Youth Access which has a database of free youth advice and counselling throughout England and Wales. You can visit their website at www.youthaccess.org.uk to look for local options.

    Connect Counselling: Connect Counselling is a service offering help, support and counselling to individuals, couples and families experiencing a range of problems, such as anxiety, depression, an inability to cope, relationships, bereavement and more. They can offer a regular, weekly 50 minute sessions with an appropriate counsellor for as many times as needed. There is no fixed charge for their counselling, but they do ask for a voluntary monetary donation for each session, if possible, but they will never turn anyone away through lack of funds. Sessions can be delivered face to face in Surrey or remotely via Zoom or telephone, Monday-Friday in the daytime or evening. If you want to book in a session, phone 01276 24210 between Monday and Friday from 9:30am. Their website is https://www.connectcounselling.org.uk/


    Since you've mentioned how your mental health has been affecting your grades in school, Student Minds might also be a place for you to find support and talk to peers about struggles and get advice
    -Student Minds: There is an organisation called Student Minds. They are a mental health charity specifically for students. They empower students and members of the community to look after their own mental health, support others and create change. They also have a blog dedicated to student mental heath and university life. This is a space where you can connect in with other students to share your tips and advice and get some tips too. You can visit their website at www.studentminds.org.uk
  • Chloe234Chloe234 Community Champion Posts: 3,577 Community Veteran
    Thankyou so much @genderless_fungi 🤍
    Would it be possible for you to talk to your school's dean about it?
    Not really. She is also deputy head so anything I tell the headteacher she will say isn't true and play innocent and then the headteacher will just believe her
    can you tell me a bit more about your struggles when it comes to asking and receiving support? Do you feel like there could be a way for you to receive the support you need that would make you feel more at ease?
    Well I've not had the best childhood and it was always us being surrounded by social workers and other people. And I guess now I'm kinda just scared to talk 1-1 to people because of what I've been through and it just reminds me of moments when I had to talk 1-1 with people because of stuff that had happened and I don't really want a repeat of that/to be reminded. I guess I'm just scared to talk to someone as well because I'm so used to hiding it and although I'm the youngest, I'm my family's rock.
    I understand that you may not feel ready, or want to, disclose how you're feeling to your parents, or father in particular.
    i dont talk to my mum anymore and we lost my stepmom to a carcrash in march.
    I'll definitely take a look at those support suggestions, thankyou
    🦆💜🦆💜🦆
  • This content has been removed.
  • Chloe234Chloe234 Community Champion Posts: 3,577 Community Veteran
    edited September 18
    Past User wrote: »
    I can understand how hard that can be but maybe that might get easier once you get used to opening up a bit more. You could always imagine your talking to whoever you trust deeply.

    Your doing so well chlo <3

    Thankyou so much morgy ❤️
    Post edited by TheMix on
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  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 287 The Mix Regular
    Hi Chloe,

    I’m so sorry you’re going through such a shit time, you don’t deserve to have go through this. I’m so sorry that your teacher is being so horrible to you, I’m here for you, I know you don’t know me but I know how difficult things can get so wanted to let you know that I’m here for you,

    Take care,

    Libby/libs
  • Chloe234Chloe234 Community Champion Posts: 3,577 Community Veteran
    Libby_ wrote: »
    Hi Chloe,

    I’m so sorry you’re going through such a shit time, you don’t deserve to have go through this. I’m so sorry that your teacher is being so horrible to you, I’m here for you, I know you don’t know me but I know how difficult things can get so wanted to let you know that I’m here for you,

    Take care,

    Libby/libs

    Thankyou so much libby! I really appreciate it :)
    🦆💜🦆💜🦆
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 287 The Mix Regular
    Chloe234 wrote: »
    Libby_ wrote: »
    Hi Chloe,

    I’m so sorry you’re going through such a shit time, you don’t deserve to have go through this. I’m so sorry that your teacher is being so horrible to you, I’m here for you, I know you don’t know me but I know how difficult things can get so wanted to let you know that I’m here for you,

    Take care,

    Libby/libs

    Thankyou so much libby! I really appreciate it :)

    I’m here for you Chloe, you’re not alone ❤️
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