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Friendships😣

Former MemberFormer Member Keep being you<3Posts: 1,489 Wise Owl
Hi guys
So I’m having a problem with friendships and stuff recently I have these too girls in my class one of them is my ex best friend and one of them is supposed to be my best friend. She’s been talking rubbish about my ex best friend and recently she’s been all up close to her posting pictures on Facebook saying she’s my close friend and etc when she’s been talking crap about her.

Like I think I’ve lost my trust in her I don’t know who to trust anymore to be honest she just picks and choosing each day who she wants to be close with.

Another thing is I have this boy in my class we had an argument ages ago and his holding a grudge on me saying I don’t want to be friends anymore. It was that long that I forgot what it was about to be honest.

All this is stressing me out I have more things which I might put on a different discussion x

Comments

  • kaiikaii Posts: 510 Incredible Poster
    edited May 2022
    Hey @_Tech_Addict_Girl ,

    Thank you so much for reaching out, I'm sorry that you're dealing with friendship problems. Friendships can be very difficult at times.

    It seems that the girl who's supposed to be your best friend does actions which contradict with each other, so I understand why you think you've lost trust in her. You must feel very upset that her behaviour is very inconsistent - since it seems like she selects different people who she wants to be close with every day. May I ask, does this friend not hang out with you anymore? And do you still want to be friends with her? Do you also have any other close friends?

    I'm sorry that a boy in your class is holding a grudge against you. Arguments are distressing yet they are also necessary when it comes to understanding people. May I ask, do you still want to be friends with that boy in your class?

    You're doing your best, so keep going :smile:

    Sending love,

    Kai <3
  • Former MemberFormer Member Keep being you<3 Posts: 1,489 Wise Owl
    @kaira_rubit Hello and welcome I don’t think I saw you before. She comes up to me and acts like she hasn’t done anything wrong and she acts all happy and all that she thinks she hasn’t done anything. Considering what she’s doing picking people to be close with all the time puts me off. When she’s not happy with something she goes to someone else. It’s not worth the stress and it’s actually stressful because they are all in the same class as me. I’m in sixth form btw.

    With that boy something is telling me I want to and something is telling me I don’t. I feel like there is always drama in my class and I want to leave the sixth form but I can’t :(
  • kaiikaii Posts: 510 Incredible Poster
    Hi @_Tech_Addict_Girl , thank you very much, it's very lovely to meet you too :smile:

    That sounds very stressful, I'm very sorry for her actions. It may help to set healthy boundaries with your friend, though I know how difficult this may be. Communicating may help, so that you can talk about this issue and your feelings. I understand how daunting this can be - especially when you don't know what she's going to say or how she's going to react. It may help to write down what you want to say to her first, and then when you feel ready, you can say these words in front of her. If you're uncomfortable with face to face interaction, then alternatively, you can text her if you have her number.

    It's understandable that you feel uncertain about wanting to be friends with that boy again. You mentioned that you feel like there's a lot of drama in your class. May I ask, do you feel uncertain because you feel like it would add to the drama in your class?

    You don't have to answer this question if you don't feel comfortable with it <3

    I hope everything gets better for you :smile:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Keep being you<3 Posts: 1,489 Wise Owl
    @kaira_rubit Hi sorry for the late reply I agree it is stressful sometimes a bit too stressful. I don’t think she is mature enough to have a adult conversation to be honest so communication is no point. Non of that will work I’m a 💯 on that one.


    It's understandable that you feel uncertain about wanting to be friends with that boy again. You mentioned that you feel like there's a lot of drama in your class. May I ask, do you feel uncertain because you feel like it would add to the drama in your class?

    What do you mean can you explain ❤️

  • kaiikaii Posts: 510 Incredible Poster
    Hi @_Tech_Addict_Girl , don't worry about the late reply ^^ it's fine by me! How have things been these past few days? Has the situation changed? I hope you're okay.

    And what you've said is understandable. It would be tiring for you to communicate to someone who isn't willing to listen and put in the effort. It's great that you're aware of this - you know the right people who are worth your time and energy. <3

    Maybe it would help to not care so much whenever she hangs out with you, so that you won't be so surprised/affected whenever she decides to hang out with other people. It can be difficult to stop caring as it doesn't happen right away - and you may feel upset since you may realise how your friendship has changed. Maybe by doing this, your relationship will change naturally. People change a lot which is perfectly normal. We gain and lose some friends along the way.

    I'm so sorry for the bad wording, I'll try and rephrase that ^^ do you feel unsure whether to be friends again with that boy because you think that it would contribute to the drama in your class? I hope this is better.
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