Sleep problems

Kate_20

I find it impossible to sleep at night because I feel left behind. Everyone else have moved on with their lives while I cannot. I am so scared of the future. I am also frustrated with myself for what I have been doing everyday. I've been doing nothing or doing things wrongly each and every day. I cannot tolerate my shameful existence.

Former Member

Hi @Kate_20

I am sorry you are feeling this way. The future is scary for a lot of people, especially when we do not have a plan for it. Even those with a plan can find it scary. What is it about the future that you find scary? Sometimes doing nothing is what is best for us on that day or in that moment, you do not need to be angry at yourself for that, it was obviously something your body and mind needed at the time. Everyone goes through life differently, some people may have their dream job by 18 and do that for the rest of their lives, while some may not find their dream job until they are 40. The same goes for marriage, kids etc if that is something you are interested in. There is no such thing as falling behind in life as we all have our own trajectory of our own life. I know sometimes it can feel like we are when we see friends engaged, married or with kids, but it is important to remind ourselves that if that is something we want for ourself, it will come with time, and that time will be the right time for us. You do not need to be so hard on yourself

Kate_20

@daisyella12 That I will end up in the streets one day because I am useless. I know it is not like falling behind but it does mean losing a lot of friends because we are not in the same situation anymore. I feel extremely lonely. I can relate to those who are unemployed but most people don't have a MH issue. I feel like I am a lazy person for not being employed. I do want to get employed but nobody wants me. Who wants to hire someone who is in a mess?
Btw I really like your username.

Former Member

Hey @Kate_20

It sounds really overwhelming and exhausting dealing with these feelings constantly. It's understandable to feel so overwhelmed when you've been going through so much. You mentioned that you've been feeling lonely, is there anyone you feel safe and comfortable talking to about how you're feeling? You deserve to be supported through this. I don't think you're lazy at all, I'm unemployed because my mental health is too much for me to work in normal working environments. It doesn't make you lazy or a failure, our lives are a lot different and things that other people can do, we maybe can't and that's okay. We'll be good at some things others aren't, like empathising with others who are struggling and supporting people through difficult times. You mentioned that you want to work, I'm wondering if there's a specific area or career aspect you're looking at at the moment?

Sending you loads of love, you're doing incredibly Kate, I'm inspired by your strength to get through each day when things are so heavy

Former Member

@Kate_20 losing friends is such a scary thing, especially when it comes naturally from different situations. However, sometimes we move at different paces and we may not be in the same situation right now but in a few years time we might be. I lost friends when I went to uni because of us being in different situations, 3 years later we are in contact again because now we are both in a similar situation again. I agree with @Brookee, by no means does it make you lazy because you are unemployed. You have shown so much determination to work, which makes you far from lazy, you just might need some time to work on yourself until you feel like you could thrive in a work environment.

Thank you! It is my first and middle name

Durhamjaide

Sending hugs everyone