looking back on my life

ellie2000

i was looking back at my life, was i wrong trying to make ppl happy, were they expecting me to fail

ellie2000

do ppl set u up to fail on purpose and they dont like it wen u succeed?

Former Member

Hi @ellie2000

Do you mind me asking why these questions have come to mind? Could you give me an example of what people are expecting you to fail at?

You were not wrong for trying to make people happy. It is very common for us to try to please people, and wanting everyone to like us. However, it can never be possible to make every one happy. People that care about you should not be expecting you to fail, they should be encouraging you to succeed in whatever it is you want to do. Only those that do not care about you would set you up to fail on purpose. Sometimes people get jealous when we succeed at something they may been trying to succeed at, therefore may try to fail you on purpose. I find distancing myself from those that are jealous and want to see me fail is the best solution.

Hope this helps

ellie2000

sometimes i sleep, and my dreams go very very dark with flashbacks n stuff. i had narcersists as carestaff, aka bullies. n they would invent problems coz i was the youngest they knew i had no way of defending myself, every group of friends i made were nice at first and then got away with the most horrific stuff. i went to find friends coz where i were living. and the ppl who are nice either top themselves or they move away

ellie2000

even wen i did gd, the team leader yelled 'wat the hell u playing at' coz the others made stuff up about me doing stuff, they got angry 4 no reason. if i wasnt with cats at the weekend, i'll b . i only care about cats now not humans

ellie2000

this is one of the reasons i dont sleep

ellie2000

isit alright to go to bed at 9

Former Member

Hi Ellie @ellie2000
I think just like Daisy said, it's probably helpful if you can find a way of creating some distance from those that want to see you fail! We cannot please everyone in our lives but it is really good that you can write how you are feeling here.

You mentioned some issues with care staff that upset you or bullied you? If this is at a workplace, is there any way you can perhaps report this behaviour to someone with authority so this can be prevented? Here is a link to a page from the Citizens advice if you would like to read about workplace bullying and get some more advice!
https://citizensadvice.org.uk/work/discrimination-at-work/checking-if-its-discrimination/if-youre-being-harassed-or-bullied-at-work/

ellie2000

it sseems tht the complaind words dont words get acted on, they cover their uh hum

Stellaluna

@ellie2000 This sounds really difficult and horrible, especially if they don't want you to do well or are ganging up on you. Is there anyone at work who you feel you can speak to about your experiences? If you are struggling with flashbacks from work, it might be an idea to speak to your GP because these horrible experiences may be affecting your mental health. I hope you get the chance to have some time for self-care, relaxation and doing things you enjoy so you can look after your mental health.

ellie2000

mr c nd my mother r both now concerned, i feel bad for letting someone know who i know tht im really struggling. some ppl dont wna hear tht im struggling, y? my gp only seen emdr somewhere mentioned, i sed no to tht coz it'll bring more trauma, does it?
and does a list of types of therapies on u?, ppl tick off wat u had? so services decline u?