the negative cycle

Former Member

Does anyone come from an abusive family and find they themselves have had some abusive traits from their family too? This is what I am struggling. I try my best not to be like my mum, who always manipulates and makes people feel worthless. But sometimes when i get really angry, i will say hurtful words. I know I need to control it. But it is difficult.

Former Member

Hi @Past User,

Sending so much love your way

I'm not from an abusive family myself, so I am not speaking from personal experience. However, I do understand that we often pick up traits from those around us. So if you find yourself saying hurtful words when you are angry, and you think this is because your mum acts this way too, this truly is not your fault

This post really shows how kind and caring you are. You are very aware of the way that you sometimes act, and wish to control this, and it seems you actively try your best to not mirror the actions of your mum. This takes strength and so much genuine kindness - what a lovely person you are

I'm wondering, have you ever spoken to anybody about how you feel, or to help you in controlling this? X