ARGHH not a Zoom meeting!!

Former Member

I have struggled with social anxiety for years.

Before the pandemic hit, I was just beginning to gain confidence in meeting new people (yay!).

Now though, I am having to try and adapt to meeting new people remotely. It's a nightmare.

I'm not familiar with video-calling. I find the whole process uncomfortable, overwhelming, and stressful. 

It's hard enough for me to feel comfortable meeting people in person, let alone in front of a camera with faces staring at me and making me feel self-conscious.

This is really affecting my job prospects at the moment and my ability to gain practical experience.

Could I get help in this area?

I have only been offered general breathing techniques to relieve anxiety, which doesn't really push me towards making a video-call and getting through it.

Former Member

I totally get where you are coming from @Past User. Video calls, which might not seem daunting to some, require adaption to use. I know that for me speaking on a Zoom call is completely different from speaking to someone in person.

I understand that you find the process uncomfortable and stressful, and that you might find this more daunting or equally as daunting as meeting people face-to-face. 

Have you thought about what it is about video calls that you find stressful? For example, is it that it is a new method of communication? Is it that you aren't use to using video calls? Or is it something else? If it's one of these things or something else, do you think there is something you could do to try alleviate the thing about it that is making you nerous?

If it's because you aren't use to using them, you could always see if you can get some practice in. If you have friends or family that you are comfortable speaking to you could try video calling them instead to get use to the feeling of the call

Former Member

I'm very uncomfortable speaking over the camera on zoom calls, although one thing I've found to help is to just go for it early on. It sounds stupid but the more you hold off speaking, the more nerves and anxiety will build up inside. 

Last semester I went through every week not saying a single word. I got to the stage where I knew what I wanted to say, but by this time it felt too late to start talking. 

Another option is using the chat box instead of speaking, and turning your camera off if that's allowed. 

It's useful to think that most people can only see a few people at once and often will only have it set to the person who is speaking. Even though there's lots of people there, only a few, if any will actually be able to see your screen if they've got it set normally. 

I hope this somewhat helps, as I know how much of a struggle it's been for me as well. 

Best of luck

Former Member

Some very good points from @Anch0r33 !

It's useful to think that most people can only see a few people at once and often will only have it set to the person who is speaking. Even though there's lots of people there, only a few, if any will actually be able to see your screen if they've got it set normally.

To add to this, when I am on video calls I am very rarely paying attention to peoples videos. I'll be focused on the slides of their presentation, my own notes, thinking about what I want to perhaps say next, or looking at another internet tab.