Home Gender & Sexuality
If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Read the community guidelines before posting ✨

It’s Really broke me

Millie2787Millie2787 Community Champion Posts: 5,143 Part of The Furniture
I’m not sure where to put this so I’ll just put it here , feel free to move it if it isn’t in the right place .

For Years now I’ve always felt like there was a part of me that’s been missing , a part of me that I could never have found . Until at the start of the year I started playing around with my pronouns and realised They/Them was what felt right to me . 

Then a few months ago i realised I was Non-Binary, no I don’t know how or why all I know is that it feels right , it feels like that part of me that has been missing.

Anyways skip forward to last night I decided to put something about pronouns on my Instagram story , I was tired of hiding it away from Family .... my sister asked what are pronouns , I told her and all hell broke lose. She didn’t Accept who I was telling me I’m either “Female or male , he or she . There is no inbetween” . I then saw she text my mum saying “ ..... Not a he or a she now , hahahahaha , Get a fucking grip “ . I just know that my mum would of agreed with her she I can imagine them both laughing about me. 

When I told mum she just said I agree with her there is no in between and There’s always something wrong with you . This wasn’t something I just decided over night , it wasn’t an easy decision to make ! 

All of this has truly broken me , I spent hours last night just sobbing at the fact that my family don’t love and accept me for who I am. I mean they never did but this just confirmed it even more. 

I Basically don’t have a family anymore but I still have to live at home with mum and see my sister snd I honestly don’t know what to do. I can’t be around people who don’t accept me for who I am 
Sometimes all you need is one person to believe in you , for you to begin to believe in yourself.

Comments

  • LaineLaine Deactivated Posts: 2,762 Boards Guru
    Don't have much to offer but wanted to send all the virtual hugs! ❤️

    I think it's important to find and focus on the areas where you can be proud. 

    My best friend couldn't really be him at home but we had great times together. Focus on the people and places who love you for you.

    You know here we'll always use the correct pronouns, names, anything x

    Its great you've figured out what was missing and you should be able to live that with happiness! 

    Some things are limited with the current situation but if you can find an LGBT youth group those are great and really accepting :)

    🌈Positive thoughts🌈

    "This is my family. I found it, all on my own.
    It's little, and Broken, but still good. Yeah. Still good." ~ Stitch

    "Lately, I've been struggling with all the simple things in my life" ~ Cian Ducrot

    "I don't know if it's because my heart hurts or I'm insecure" ~ Juice Wrld
  • Salix_alba_2019Salix_alba_2019 Deactivated Posts: 1,646 Extreme Poster
    We're your family and we'll always accept you and be proud of you. 

    Love you to the moon and back @Millie2787 ❤️
  • Millie2787Millie2787 Community Champion Posts: 5,143 Part of The Furniture
    I love you guys @Laine @Salix_alba_2019 so much  :'(
    Sometimes all you need is one person to believe in you , for you to begin to believe in yourself.
  • _Tech_Addict_Girl_Tech_Addict_Girl Posts: 1,489 Wise Owl
    Sending hugs we are here for u🤗❤️🥰
  • independent_independent_ Community Champion Posts: 8,610 Legendary Poster
    Sending you massive hugs <3 I’m really sorry they didn’t react well. Some people will never understand, it’s really sad. You should be able to be proud of who you are and to be yourself. 

    I think @Laine is right that focusing on the places where you are accepted is a good plan. It’s hard when you’re living with the people who don’t accept you, but spend as much time in places that do (even if that’s online) as you can <3 
    “Sometimes the people around you won’t understand your journey. They don’t need to, it’s not for them.”
  • coc0maccoc0mac Posts: 1,054 Wise Owl
    Sending so many hugs your way :heart: You truly deserve to be loved and accepted for exactly who you are. You were so brave to share that piece of you with your family and I am so sorry they did not react the way you hoped. I sincerely hope that with time they can show you the love and respect that you deserve.

    I love what @Salix_alba_2019 has said - 'we are your family and we'll always accept you and be proud of you.' That is so, so true. We are immensely proud of you and you are totally accepted here, exactly as you are. You are a wonderful person - we will always be here to remind you of that :heart:
  • Lucy307Lucy307 Posts: 1,171 Wise Owl
    Just stopping by to echo everything that’s been said really @Millie2787. Really proud of you for realising this and being open about it. Your family sound like they don’t understand right now... maybe one day they will, maybe they won’t, but we will always be here for you and respect and accept you for who you are. 💜
    Treat yourself as you would treat a good friend
  • Kesh260807Kesh260807 Posts: 47 Boards Initiate
    I’m not sure where to put this so I’ll just put it here , feel free to move it if it isn’t in the right place .

    For Years now I’ve always felt like there was a part of me that’s been missing , a part of me that I could never have found . Until at the start of the year I started playing around with my pronouns and realised They/Them was what felt right to me . 

    Then a few months ago i realised I was Non-Binary, no I don’t know how or why all I know is that it feels right , it feels like that part of me that has been missing.

    Anyways skip forward to last night I decided to put something about pronouns on my Instagram story , I was tired of hiding it away from Family .... my sister asked what are pronouns , I told her and all hell broke lose. She didn’t Accept who I was telling me I’m either “Female or male , he or she . There is no inbetween” . I then saw she text my mum saying “ ..... Not a he or a she now , hahahahaha , Get a fucking grip “ . I just know that my mum would of agreed with her she I can imagine them both laughing about me. 

    When I told mum she just said I agree with her there is no in between and There’s always something wrong with you . This wasn’t something I just decided over night , it wasn’t an easy decision to make ! 

    All of this has truly broken me , I spent hours last night just sobbing at the fact that my family don’t love and accept me for who I am. I mean they never did but this just confirmed it even more. 

    I Basically don’t have a family anymore but I still have to live at home with mum and see my sister snd I honestly don’t know what to do. I can’t be around people who don’t accept me for who I am 
    i cant really give advice im sorry this has happended to you well done for coming out to your family it is really hard espically is they act like this i dont have much advice though i am gender fluid i understand my parents are both homophobic and transophobic so it has been hard to hide my self i dont have much advice have you tried explaining to them or not? if they tell you to decide how about pretend you did it can be really painfull if they do keep calling you a he or she try telling your freiends see if they expect you
    You are loved and you are amazing
  • _Tech_Addict_Girl_Tech_Addict_Girl Posts: 1,489 Wise Owl
    Sending hugs ❤️❤️
  • maryam852maryam852 Posts: 187 Helping Hand
    @Millie2787 I'm so sorry to hear you are going through this, it must be a horrible thing to go through. You have the right to be sad but remember how brave you are, having decided to come out. Your family seem to be forgetting that you are still the same person you were before you came out and that your gender does not change a thing. You are so much more interesting than your gender but if your family cannot see that and only associate that with you, then they are in the wrong- not you. I want you to remember that your feelings are valid and that your family don't seem to understand your feelings. It would be good idea to talk to an organisation that helps people in your situation or even arranging for them to talk to your family. Would you like me to send a link? Remember that above all, you are human and you deserve the same amount of respect any other human should get. Well done, I am so proud of you for coming out -I know how hard it must have been! Well done!
  • summerxo21summerxo21 Deactivated Posts: 321 The Mix Regular
    maryam852 wrote: »
    @Millie2787 I'm so sorry to hear you are going through this, it must be a horrible thing to go through. You have the right to be sad but remember how brave you are, having decided to come out. Your family seem to be forgetting that you are still the same person you were before you came out and that your gender does not change a thing. You are so much more interesting than your gender but if your family cannot see that and only associate that with you, then they are in the wrong- not you. I want you to remember that your feelings are valid and that your family don't seem to understand your feelings. It would be good idea to talk to an organisation that helps people in your situation or even arranging for them to talk to your family. Would you like me to send a link? Remember that above all, you are human and you deserve the same amount of respect any other human should get. Well done, I am so proud of you for coming out -I know how hard it must have been! Well done!

    hugs
Sign In or Register to comment.