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Debating Running Away from home

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 10 Settling in
edited October 2020 in Health & Wellbeing
Normally I am a super happy fun and jolly person, any of my friends would say that, whenever I'm out or at school i have fun and laugh and it great, even if I'm home alone, or on a VC through discord with people I'm happy. However, The Minute and I seriously mean within a minute of talking to either of my parents im holding back tears and as soon as the leave I run to my room to sob, and sometimes harm myself, I get shaky and severe anxiety this has got worse and worse for months, it started with me being mildly sad, and i told myself at least om not depressed, harming myself, panic attacks, but i can safely say check check check now. This has caused my grades which have always been A's and B's to drop to C's D's and even an F. A few weeks ago i had Covid, so I went to live at my grandmothers house as it is currently empty. (She is in a home) That was the first time in months i went a week without crying, and I actually didn't cry for two. I even pretended my symptoms lasted longer then they had so i could stay, But the day I had to go home I cried myself to sleep and harmed myself again. I seriously don't know if i can keep living like this, so im debating running away, my grandmas house is still empty, and i can go to school online, I have a laptop and there is wifi there. I rollerblade Miles a day all the time, so i can get to stores easy, I have a little money, but i mow lawns and such so i can get more, I also have friend who is getting food cards because he cant work as much cause Covid, but hes my age (15) so he doesnt use them for anything, and he can help me out. i dont think i'd leave for long, but maybe like 3 or 4 days just to get a break, and maybe catch up on school, as i wont have to be terrified thinking my parents might walk in. the problem is even though i could do i dont know if it is the smartest way to handle this.  I could really use some help, Thank you in advance. (btw im a 15 year old male)

[Minor edits made by mod]
Post edited by Ed_ on
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  • Past UserPast User Posts: 90 Budding Regular
    edited October 2020
    The user and all related content has been deleted.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 10 Settling in
    Whats a trigger warning?

  • Former MemberFormer Member Living the Zen life 🧘🏼‍♀️ Posts: 1,989 Extreme Poster
    edited September 18
    @Past User Welcome to The Mix! 

    A trigger warning it just a little note you would put at the top so people know that you may be discussing some tough topics, like a pre-warning. For example, if I was going to mention about self-harm, at the top I would say *Trigger warning (Self-harm)*. That way people know whether they should step back or not :) 
    Post edited by TheMix on
  • independent_independent_ Community Champion Posts: 9,016 Supreme Poster
    Hey,

    That sounds like a really tough situation to be in. Family can be really difficult sometimes as it's not always the supportive environment it really should be.

    Running away will always have some risk attached to it. How do you think your parents would react if you spoke to them about it and said how much you enjoyed staying at your grandmas house and you'd like to stay there again for a bit?

    If this is too difficult, how about school? How are things at school? If there's a teacher you can trust, it may be worth speaking to them about it. If not a teacher, perhaps it might be worth speaking to someone like your school counsellor - they might be eable to help you to find ways to cope with how you're feeling. 

    Take care I really do hope you find a solution. 
    “Sometimes the people around you won’t understand your journey. They don’t need to, it’s not for them.”
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1 Just got here
    hi im laine im new to here,
    i suffer from deppression and anxiety. im a self harmer and an anorexic, i have a toxic mom and im planning on moving away to japan once im old enough to get away from her abuse and i can live a happy life :)
    ive tried getting therapy my mom said no so im not alloud to ive commited suicide 3 times.
    and i wish i could get help from school but they would tell my parents and all my teacgers treat me like trash so.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Fruit loop Deactivated Posts: 2,762 Boards Guru
    Welcome to the mix!

    Sorry to hear of your struggles ❤️

    This is a pretty old thread so you may find it beneficial to make your own you cna look through the the forums and pick a topic that fits :)

    I hope you can get some support here I have no doubts you will!

    We also have group chats that run every night a general chat and a support one, as well as support circle, and U16s :)
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