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Little Miss Understanding.

JuiTHEvirgoJuiTHEvirgo Posts: 1 Just got here
Hello, I am not comfortable with putting my name out there so we are gonna go by E, if thats okay with you guys. i am 27 years old with 2 kids. im currently or been currently going through some very hard situations that has led me in a dark place. i am a genuine person and will give anyone the shirt off my back but it just doesnt seem to be giving me the same back in return. ive been in a relationship for 9 years since the age of 17. my oldest son had just turned 1 month. during those 9 years we both have been very TOXIC to one another but when it first started it wasnt suppose to go as far as it has gotten now. ... years down the line he has 7 kids out of those 7. 1 of them are MINE, he told me the truth about the first 3' so i decided to stay because he told the truth but 3' of them he lied about and finally admit to it last year (I already knew). we have been in about 3 real altercation that was physical everthing else is more so verbal and it has tore me down i will literally cry over anything at this point. his tone of voice is like he talking to me like he my master and not my man. he doesnt work so everything is on me .. finicially EVERYTHING. even when he had a job he did for everyone else but the one who really goes above and beyond. i never have time for ME. i put so much into my kids and this man i dont have time for ME and that has become a toll on me. in 2018 i became a victim of hurricane florence that wiped us completely out. and we had to start all over i am in area by myself no family just me my kids and this man, so fast forward to may 2020 where a phone was thrown to my eye and cause me to have surgery where now im currently gonna have to have catract surgery because i can not see out my left eye. i just truly need a friend i can talk to get things off my chest without being judge . or laughed at there is soo much more to me and i have so much in the inside i just dont trust anyone to let it out and here i am coming to a website for help . this is my cry because i have had days where i thought i was better off dead, only thing that has stop me was and are my kids. 
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