What to do? Not sure about girl I'm dating.

Former Member

So I went on a first date yesterday with this girl I've been texting for over a month. You'll have seen my other posts about this and my breakup with my ex (which I would say I'm still getting over).

I just wanna know what I should do if I'm not 100% sure about her. I was planning on ending it next week but after the date I think I like her a lot more after seeing her in person. I really don't know what to do.

I kinda feel like I wanna see multiple girls but I hate that cos I associate it with my ex gf. I just feel lost. Maybe I'm not fully over my ex and wanting to find something similar to that.

I should tell this girl how I feel but I honestly don't know what to put. Any ideas?

And she's an awful lot more into me it seems.

Like I'm scared I'll feel super lonely again if I end it completely. But then I can't have my cake and eat it cos that's not nice for her and something my ex basically wanted and I don't want to become something I hate.

Former Member

What I would say, is maybe go on one more date with her and see how you feel. I know it’s very hard to get over an ex, but maybe putting yourself out there and going on one more date might help a little. It sounds like a difficult situation, but maybe going on one more date might enable you to get to know her a little more and see what type of person she really is, as well as seeing how you feel about everything. 

If you walk away from it feeling as if you still aren’t 100% sure, then maybe consider just messaging her and being like 

“You’re a lovely girl, and the time I’ve spent with you has been nice, but I think we would be better suited as friends.”

However, if you’re feeling as if you wouldn’t want to go on another date with her, then just send her a polite message explaining that you just want to be friends and nothing more. 

Former Member

Hi @TiredSquirrel

I agree with @Past User. On the one hand you shouldn't have to majorly rush a decision, so it might be nice to go on one more date. This can give you more of a chance to reflect and figure out how you truly feel. On the other hand, I understand that you don't want to lead her on too much if you were to end it in the future. But that's why another date could really help, to help you in making a decision. 

Honesty is key and she will respect that, so if you did decide to end things then it's totally okay to tell her the truth. And if it comes to that, feel free to post on the boards and we can all support you with figuring out what you might say. But go easy on yourself - explore your feelings and give yourself a chance to reflect. You'll know, you really will