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Mum Might have cancer
Millie2787
Community Champion Posts: 5,199 Part of The Furniture
Hey Guys ,
so I’m really stressed and agitated at the moment, mum is having tests done for bowel cancer ... and it’s stressing me out , it wouldn’t stress me as much but she’s had cancer twice in the past and she keeps saying “you know that they say once you’ve had it , it never really leaves you” and everytime she’s got it, it has come back every 7 years .... it’s been 7 years since she had cervical cancer.
Im scared , she will have to take a lot of time off work and we wouldn’t be able to afford that .. we’d be getting back into debt again and my care role wojld
get so much worse and I don’t think I could cope. That’s even if she could fight it , she’s much older now and I don’t know if she would cope with treatment/ surgery
she has to go for a CT scan next Saturday and were waiting for an appointment for an colonoscopy..
Guys I’m scared 🥺
so I’m really stressed and agitated at the moment, mum is having tests done for bowel cancer ... and it’s stressing me out , it wouldn’t stress me as much but she’s had cancer twice in the past and she keeps saying “you know that they say once you’ve had it , it never really leaves you” and everytime she’s got it, it has come back every 7 years .... it’s been 7 years since she had cervical cancer.
Im scared , she will have to take a lot of time off work and we wouldn’t be able to afford that .. we’d be getting back into debt again and my care role wojld
get so much worse and I don’t think I could cope. That’s even if she could fight it , she’s much older now and I don’t know if she would cope with treatment/ surgery
she has to go for a CT scan next Saturday and were waiting for an appointment for an colonoscopy..
Guys I’m scared 🥺
Sometimes all you need is one person to believe in you , for you to begin to believe in yourself.
8
Comments
I’m really sorry to hear that it must be absolutely awful and really scary.
I’ve no advice for you but just wanted to send you massive hugs always here if you need a chat
For the money worries, have you ever considered applying for benefits if things turn for the worst?
I don’t know maybe I’m jumping the gun abir but I’m just scared
It's okay to be scared hun and you've been doing such a fantastic job at getting by ❤️. Watching a loved one go through cancer twice let alone twice sounds so upsetting.
Hopefully something can be done to help relive the financial stressors. @The Mix what do you recon?
Take each day as it comes 💕
Macmillan have a Support Line you can call, which might be worth a try. Cancer Research UK also have some information on government benefits. Under 'available benefits', it lists a bunch of things you're entitled to claim so it might be worth looking at that and seeing what's viable for you.
@Mike Ill have alook at those links thank you ... I’m not a part of any community as I feel bad being there since she doesn't actually have cancer yet ... I know it sounds selfish but I worry about my future I worry that if she gets I’ll am I going to be able to go to uni , am I going to be able to carry on with work there’s just so many things going round it’s overwhelming.
i feel bad I can’t even go to the scan with her as I’m working that morning , guess I wouldn’t even be allowed in because of coronavirus
Thank you everyone for being so kind , it means a lot
Right now I’m trying so hard to push it to the back
of my mind In the hope of eases some of the anxiety and worry
How are you feeling right now?
Lucy
I'm glad to see that this thread is helping you to talk about what you are experiencing. Everyone's comments are so valid and I'd like to reiterate what @Mike has said both about feeling that you are welcome within those cancer communities and that the processing of this trauma takes much longer than the time of remission takes.
It's really great news about the all clears from the first two tests and fingers crossed about the final test. You mentioned that you are waiting for a hospital referral yourself, would you like to talk about that?
You also said that you were trying to push all these worrying thoughts to the back of your mind in order to try and relieve some of the anxiety you're experiencing. How has this been so far?
I can only speak for myself but sometimes I find it useful to confront the things that are making me anxious, and try and sit with them and accept them. Often that feeling anxiety stems from trying to take control over things that are out of our control. It's not an easy thing to do but would you say that what is going on right now is out of your control?
Sending positive thoughts and hugs towards you and your family
I’m just having some issues with my bladder nothing major but it’s like I don’t want to add to mums worry.
its been hard to keep those thoughts pushed back but it’s like when I do manage to my head just fills the space with another anxious thought
Take care, okay? listen an calm music, i hope this can help you a little..
and you have to talk to her, you know... or maybe to someone esle this is an impportant thing
Sending you huge hugs. This sounds so difficult, I am pleased you opened up here. Whenever you feel like you're pushing anxious thoughts away or your head is becoming filled with them, please always remember you can let them out here, always
Please do keep us updated - I really hope everything turns out for the best
Just want to check in and see how you are doing?
Have you seen your GP about your health issues?