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Am I gay? Or has past abuse made me not attracted to men?

AngrySocialDolphinAngrySocialDolphin Posts: 7 Confirmed not a robot
I think I am a lesbian as have realised I am attracted to women.
but I can’t help wonder if this has been affected by my rape from a previous boyfriend making me not attracted to men.
im so confused, any comments welcome x


  • independent_independent_ Resident Coffee Addict ScotlandPosts: 2,933 Boards Guru
    Hi @AngrySocialDolphin (I love that username, by the way).

    The thing with sexuality is that it is not set in stone and it can change significantly over time. It takes time to figure out who you are, and it’s ok for that to change over time.

    I can’t comment on whether your sexuality is influenced by your previous experiences, but either way, it’s ok to feel the way you do.

    You also don’t have to give yourself a label straight away if you don’t want to/aren’t quite comfortable with that yet. That takes time too, and it’s ok to admit you’re a bit confused and to experiment to figure it out.

    I wish you all the best, take care :) 
    “Sometimes the people around you won’t understand your journey. They don’t need to, it’s not for them.”
  • Tee ATee A Posts: 66 Boards Initiate
    Hey @AngrySocialDolphin !

    I totally agree with @independent_

    I also just wanted to reiterate that sexuality is so fluid and you don't have to label anything. You could be X now but Y when you're 60! I'm sorry to hear what happened to you in the past. 

    Live your best life!
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