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Don't know what to do - waiting list

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 199 Trailblazer
in Health & Wellbeing
Hi everyone

In finding something that can help me through I found this site. And you all sound really supportive from what I've read.

I've previously got professional help but it didn't really work for me. After some big changes and a mental breakdown I finally tried to get help again. After three weeks I got an intake, they said they couldn't help me. Seven months later I had my second intakes at a facility that deals with everything so they can't deny me. I got diagnosed with dysthemia and PTSD (which I have for nearly 8 years now).

It's now 9 months after I tried to get help, when it was already too late anyways. They can't tell me how long it will take. I don't know how long I can keep up with this. I'm losing hope. I'm losing my memories. I'm afraid I will be too far gone.

Does anyone have any suggestions that can help while I'm on the waiting list for treatment? Calling and writing a journal aren't an option.

Thank you so much
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Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 3,590 Community Veteran
    edited September 18
    Hey @Past User  Welcome to the mix :)

    im sorry to hear the help in the past didn't really work, and then they said they couldn't help you.. I know a lot of people on here have been refused help from services so hope they can comment with things to help.
    as far as I see things, it's never too late to recover, which I fully believe you can :)
    you say calling isn't an option, what about texting? the mix have a crisis messenger for when you feel you need them, theres also the chats in the evenings on here where everything stays confidential (unless the mix are concerned that your a danger to yourself (standard with any form of help))
    im sorry I cant offer more help, ive always been in services and got fast racked so never had to wait, but I do still struggle on weekends when there isn't really any help, somethings that get me though is talking to my friends, doing something artsy, doing some basic housework to keep me distracted and practising self care, do you do much of this? self care is so important and helps you feel better about yourself :) 

    hope some of this can be of use to you, take care <3
    Post edited by TheMix on
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 199 Trailblazer
    edited September 17
    @Past User Thankyou, I've been living like this for quite some time now so it's difficult to think that how I feel can be different. Texting is okay, I will definitely look into that.

    I'm so glad you got help fast. I wouldn't want this waiting for anyone else. And then to think I was an emergency case haha.

    My friends usually will try to change the subject when I try to talk about it. The only thing that gets me going is shopping right now. I do a bit of self care here and there, and I don't feel bad about myself so I've that going for me.

    Thanks a lot for your reply  <3
    Post edited by TheMix on
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,054 Wise Owl
    edited September 18
    Hi @Past User

    How are you doing today? :heart:

    I think the previous suggesting of texting rather than calling could be a great idea, and it would be good to hear how you get on if you do try that out. One more thing I just wanted to suggest was talking to The Mix on a 1-2-1 chat as a way of finding additional support in the meantime. You can explain to them that calling and journaling aren't currently options, and they can explore other available options with you. Sometimes we have to try a few different things until we find what helps us the best and that's okay - the main thing is that you are seeking help, this shows a lot of courage and is a great way to move towards getting the support you deserve :heart:

    Good luck - it would be good to hear how you get on! x
    Post edited by TheMix on
  • Former MemberFormer Member Moderator Posts: 1,084 Wise Owl
    edited September 18
    Hey @Past User

    Just wanted to check in to see how you are feeling? Also wanted to echo what has already been said :heart:

    We're here for you, and it's really positive that you are reaching out for some support here. :heart:

    Sending hugs :smile:
    Post edited by TheMix on
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 309 The Mix Regular
    edited September 18
    Hi @Past User 

    The Mix have a page here about what you can do while you're on a waiting list which might give you some ideas: https://www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/mental-health-treatments/im-on-the-waiting-list-for-counselling-now-what-24784.html

    Sending you hugs <3
    Post edited by TheMix on
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 199 Trailblazer
    Thank you all <3

    I've been trying the chat for three days now, hopefully I'll get connected this evening. I have sessions with a care provider and she gave me exercises to do at home. But to be honest, I'm almost done fighting. I know going outside, sleeping, meditating and writing will help but I can't get myself to it. It's like I don't even want to try anymore.

    I will talked to her about this and see if she has any other options. But I think the only thing that helps now is just talking about it.

    Thank you for your support! I tried some mindfulness exercises last night and I even skimmed a book (which is a huge deal since I haven't read a book in years)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Deactivated Posts: 508 Incredible Poster
    edited September 18
    Well done for attempting to reach out over the three days and trying to connect to the chat @Past User. It's sounds like things are difficult at the moment, so identifying something that helps is a positive step forwards :)

    Sometimes you'll be put in a queue, but you shouldn't have to wait for too long. We have contacted the tech team about possible issues with the 1-2-1 chat anyway, and they will have a look to see what could be causing this issue. 

    How did the mindfulness exercises feel for you? Also, which book did you choose to skim?
    Post edited by TheMix on
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 199 Trailblazer
    @Connor Thanks I will try again on other evenings. The exercises was mostly breathing and focussing on the tension in your body, to help with sleeping. But it only made it worse. So I'll try something else.

    The book was about the second world war
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 199 Trailblazer
    None of this is helping
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,681 Skive's The Limit
    Heyy,

    9 months is a long time to be waiting and thats really frustating. Im really glad you saught that help though and seekinng help on here and i know you said its like you dont feel like trying, although it may not feel like it but even coming on here to write is an achievement in time we feel like we sometimes cant be bothered. It shows real strength. Mindfullness is exercises is not for everyone and can make people feel worse. Its okay.
     Its good to try these things out and all these steps are you trying to take control which is inspiring <3

    i believe in you. I hope you get seen soon and dont have to wait much longer. I hope we can be some outlet for you in the meantime or til whenever if it helps 
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 199 Trailblazer
    edited March 2020
    Thank you so much @Shaunie <3 
    I know one side of me is still fighting, I hope it continues to do that
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 199 Trailblazer
    Going off on the average waiting time my treatment would start somewhere begin April.

    I'm afraid it's going to be postponed because of the virus. I feel like there's nothing I can do. Everytime I get close to getting help there will be a setback that prevents me from getting it. It's so tiring.
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,681 Skive's The Limit
    Hey I'm so sorry i feel so helpless as i Cant Make you're wait shorter ah. But i empathise. Its really hard. <3. I am so happy you have found this place as it seems some sort of support for you at the moment? I hope so anyway hugs!<3
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 199 Trailblazer
    Thank you! Yea it helps a bit. I read that some psychologists are doing video call sessions so hopefully it's my turn when the virus is onder control and we can go outside again. I don't have privacy at home so calling wouldn't be an option
  • Former MemberFormer Member Moderator Posts: 660 Incredible Poster
    edited September 18
    Hey there @Past User I just wanted to check in and see how you are feeling today?  <3
    Post edited by TheMix on
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 199 Trailblazer
    Not too great @Jade09
    It's getting worse
    I can't get help, I can't save money to persue my dream, the one thing that held me together. I can't stand all the sounds at home. I'm losing my mind
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,171 Wise Owl
    edited September 18
    Hey @Past User I'm really sorry to hear you feel it's getting worse. Do you want to talk a little bit more about what's going on at home and what you want to save money to pursue? Hopefully we can help by talking things through <3 

    Sending hugs, we're all here for you.
    Post edited by TheMix on
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 199 Trailblazer
    @Lucy307 thankyou. I need to think a lot and I need rest, but the sounds people make, like breathing and screaming kids are making me go crazy. I want to save for travel but can't do that before I get proper help
  • Former MemberFormer Member Living the Zen life 🧘🏼‍♀️ Posts: 1,989 Extreme Poster
    edited September 18
    @Past User Have you tried mindfulness meditation? Meditation can really help you to find a safe place within yourself so that when the outside environmental input becomes to much, you can sort of retreat inside yourself in a way that you feel safe and the outside can't get it. 

    It takes a lot of practice but once you can do it, it's amazing and it's a healthy escape/coping mechanism. My therapist has been helping to teach me how to do it so it's worth a shot! 
    Post edited by TheMix on
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 199 Trailblazer
    @MountainPeak
    Yes I've tried and I got some home excersizes from my gp, but it was horrible. It made my symptoms worse and I freaked out everytime. I do kinda live in my bubble but I'm trying not to because I don't respond to people or I lash out at them
  • Former MemberFormer Member Living the Zen life 🧘🏼‍♀️ Posts: 1,989 Extreme Poster
    edited September 18
    @Past User

    Ahh okay well that's great that you're giving things a go! Not everything works for everyone! 

    Your own bubble is probably the safest place to be when it comes to your comfort-zone but maybe little steps could help if you wanted to push yourself more? Set little goals that are manageable and achievable so that you can gradually come away from your bubble. Maybe if you're worried about not responding to people, have a goal of if someone says hi to you, you can smile back or if it feels okay to, then you can say hi back. 

    Anything is a step in the right direction no matter how small. Even if you decide that your're not ready to leave your comfort zone yet then that's also fine! Everything is at your own pace <3
    Post edited by TheMix on
  • Former MemberFormer Member Moderator Posts: 660 Incredible Poster
    edited September 18
    Just wanted to check in @Past User how are you feeling today?  <3
    Post edited by TheMix on
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 199 Trailblazer
    @Jade09 not good. I'm might be getting sick this week. I'm worried. My motivation for getting better is declining
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