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ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 4,293 Community Veteran
Help drunk bad friends wat do I do
Crazy mad insane

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 57 Boards Initiate
    Hi @ellie2000

    I've just moved this to Drink and Drug, as people there will be able to help you more. The best advice i can give you is keep them hydrated and sat up right. 

    Hope you and your friend are safe <3
  • ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 4,293 Community Veteran
    im unable to make friends who won't pull my trousers down and other things. I tend to go after wrong crowds
    Crazy mad insane
  • JustVJustV Community Manager Posts: 5,577 Part of The Furniture
    @ellie2000 that's horrible and very very very wrong of them. :( Nobody has the right to make you feel uncomfortable, or to touch you without your permission (especially removing your clothes).

    I can't think of a 'nice' way to ask this (for want of a better word), but when this happens, do they make advances on you or do anything else that you're not okay with? How often do they do this?

    I know you haven't used the phrase 'sexual assault' and I don't want to worry you, but there are organisations out there that offer support specifically around these sorts of things, and that will understand what you're going through. We have an article titled 'was it sexual assault?' which might be useful to read, and they have a 'next steps' box at the bottom with some places you can go:

    Next Steps

    • Our Crisis Messenger provides free, 24/7 crisis support across the UK. If you’re aged 25 or under, you can text THEMIX to 85258
    • Rape Crisis offers support and advice to victims of rape and sexual assault, no matter how long ago the attack was. 0808 802 99 99
    • Find your nearest Rape Crisis centre here.
    • Chat about this subject on our Discussion Boards.
    • Need help but confused where to go locally? Download our StepFinder iPhone app to find local support services quickly.

    Not sure if I've made a misjudgement here but it would be good to know what you think. Well done for talking here Ellie and there are people here that care about you.
    All behaviour is a need trying to be met.
    The truth resists simplicity.
  • ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 4,293 Community Veteran
    edited October 2019
    someone who I tlk to says 'ur hitting the back wall stop it'.
     they do make advances towards me nd I don't like it. lack of trust stays with you 4eva, tht goes with 'professional' ppl too but with them its verbal bullying. ppl. nothings the same as it was. ppl tht I tlk to expect I can recover, but its not simple.

    TW: abuse
    I had footballs kicked at me too after they told me to strip nude, then I had a knife held up to me.

    the next group of 'freinds' I put my trust in the sexual assault happened. its hard to trust any1 now
    Post edited by JustV on
    Crazy mad insane
  • Former MemberFormer Member Lyrical Poster Posts: 5,462 Part of The Furniture
    Hey ellie :heart:

    Just wanted to send you some hugs :heart:

    Sorry to hear how you are feeling, we are here for you and care about you.

    How are you feeling today?
  • JustVJustV Community Manager Posts: 5,577 Part of The Furniture
    edited October 2019
    It's super brave of you to share that @ellie2000 - well done. What you've been through is so horrible and nobody should ever have to experience that. :( I don't really have the words, but I'm so glad you told us and that you're talking about it now.

    You mentioned talking to 'professional' people - what sort of professional people have you talked to? Are you getting any support right now? It sucks to hear you've had some bad experiences with people who are meant to be there to support you. Sometimes it takes a while to find someone (e.g. a counsellor) who you get on with and can really feel comfortable around.

    Also, you're right - recovery is not simple. It's not fair or easy either, and it sucks that anyone has to go through it. Even if recovery feels like a long way away right now (or even impossible to find), you can make steps in that direction and start that journey. Being here is one of those steps and shows that you're brave.

    Well done again, and keep us posted on how you're doing. Although the people in your life and your friends (if we can call them that) don't treat you well, this is a safe place for you to be. :)
    All behaviour is a need trying to be met.
    The truth resists simplicity.
  • ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 4,293 Community Veteran
    Ppl who abuse Thier power who bully u and get paid
    Crazy mad insane
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 33 Boards Initiate
    Hey @ellie2000, how are you?

    It's amazing that you have come forward and been able to talk about some of the terrible things you've had to go through. 

    You mentioned 'people who abuse their power'? Is this someone who you have been getting professional help from who is not treating you well either? If so, would you think about getting help somewhere else? You do not need to or deserve to put up with anyone who treats you unfairly. 

    No one deserves to go through what you have and I'm sorry to hear about it. Treatment is a difficult process, but worthwhile. I hope you are able to get the help you need and deserve. In the meantime, perhaps try and spend time with the people around you that are kind and treat you well. Do the things that make you happy and focus on yourself. 

    I hope you're doing well and look forward to hearing from you. 

    Sending all of the support  <3
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